Who Am I
by mesmerizedbyceruleaneyes
Summary: My name is Fuji Syuusuke, and I'm a girl. Yes, you heard that right. FujiXMany, final pairing undecided... Post-canon, set mostly in high school. Disclaimer on my profile. "He doesn't say it, but he wants you to see him. Really see him."
1. Prologue

**Who am I?**

Prologue 

I'm a girl, and my name is Fuji Syuusuke.

Yes, you heard it right. It's a fact, so you can build a bridge and get over it. I'd show you, if it weren't exceedingly immodest.

Shock! Horror! The tennis tensai Fuji Syuusuke is a girl! The media will have a field day!

Well, they'd only find out if _you_ broadcast it to the rest of the world. Allow me to inform you that if you _do_ choose to do that, you will live to regret it every day for the rest of your life. Which won't be long, I can tell you now. I haven't come so far to get caught.

So why, you ask, why did I choose to make a name for myself as a male? I could easily have risen to the top as a female. Why did I pretend and lie so long that even I was almost convinced? Why did I cut my hair and close my eyes, making the transformation from a beautiful girl to a pretty boy, a bishounen? Why did I close myself within a protective shell of lies instead of flying free?

Even I do not really know the reason.

Maybe, I was curious. I wanted to know why boys seemed to be more important to society than girls. I wanted to understand why boys were thought to be superior to girls in all aspects. Perhaps, I wanted to prove that a girl could as much as a boy could – no, that a girl could be better.

Six years old, and already something to prove. Six years old, and already aware of the suppressed but still present gender discrimination. My formless plans and unproven theories took shape slowly; tennis was the catalyst. When my coach of that time jokingly suggested I register as a male to participate in the boys' competition because I was almost certainly on par with the best boys she had taught, I jumped at the chance. In an effort to humor me, she registered me in a regional competition, and was stunned speechless upon sight of my trophy. From then on, I always registered in boys' competitions, and since I didn't want to be found out, I had to be a boy the rest of the time too. Thus my masquerade began.

Naturally, I never tried to… shall we say, _look_ at my male friends. What kind of pervert do you think I am? I always waited for the showers to be empty before entering; if the shower was not especially necessary, I would forgo it entirely. In other aspects I tried to emulate my teammates' behavior; as much as possible, I tried to avoid attracting attention to the feminine characteristics I possessed – well, I wasn't about to actually go for a sex change, which meant I retained most female attributes, making an almost too-perfect bishounen.

By now, I've spent two-thirds of my life as a boy. Even my own family is accustomed to referring to me as a son and brother; Yuuta always calls me his Aniki, even when there are no other people around. This act, this deception – I think I'm grateful to it. So many of the close friends I have made since I started – Saeki, Eiji – if I were just a girl, they would have been unreachable, untouchable; immensely popular, I would have been crushed by their fan clubs had I even tried to get to know them. But as a boy, nobody minded that I was their friend. Why, even _I_ had a fan club; girls do seem to like bishounen for some reason.

Sometimes I wonder how that extensive fan club of mine would react if they received information that their beloved 'Fuji-sama' was a girl. Probably a drastic decline in the amount of Valentine's Day chocolate, love letters and confessions. I do like the chocolate, but the love letters and confessions were just too awkward, so that would be an improvement. The downside is that I'm likely to get fanboys instead, which isn't the most appealing thought either.

Now that you know who, why and what I am, let the story begin.


	2. Perception

**Chapter 1: Perception**

(Flashback)

"Fuji-sempai, why is it that you always only go and shower after we're all done?"

I glanced at Echizen in mild surprise. The freshman wasn't usually the type to initiate a conversation. "Saa, you're in a good mood, aren't you?"

He just stared at me with his gold, cat-like eyes. "You're avoiding the question."

"I know. That's what makes it fun, ne?" I smiled, while mentally casting around for something to throw him off my trail.

"You're scared, Fuji-sempai. Never mind; I'm sure we'll know soon enough. Chez…" Echizen tugged his cap lower and headed out of the school.

As I watched him leave, I breathed a sigh of relief. When had Echizen become so perceptive? I wondered, before taking my things and going to the vacated showers.

(End Flashback)

"Fujiko-chan…? Anybody at home in there?" A bouncy redhead waved a hand vigorously in front of my face.

"Ah, gomen Eiji," I apologized to my best friend. "I was thinking."

"Ohhhh scary… What were you thinking about?" he asked, bouncing in his seat – his hyper energy made sure that he could never sit still.

"Echizen," I said truthfully.

"Why were you thinking about Ochibi? Mou, I thought you might've been thinking about me; I _am_ your best friend, right? Right?" Eiji peered at me with navy feline eyes, searching for reassurance.

"Of course you're my best friend," I replied. "I was just wondering whether he'll be immediately made buchou once Tezuka and the rest of us graduate, even though Momo and Kaidoh are older. Neither of them are real buchou material, in my opinion."

"Nya, you're right… that's certainly something to think about…" he nodded sagely. "I think Ochibi will be buchou immediately; he's the best after all."

"Perceptive too…" I mused under my breath. Aloud, I said, "Mm, that was my conclusion too."

We sat in comfortable silence for a few moments, thinking our own thoughts. Eiji broke it first.

"Nya, Fujiko…" he began.

"Yes, Eiji?" I turned to him. He didn't answer immediately, but I knew he was just trying to phrase himself before saying anything.

I don't want to graduate!" he cried at last, grabbing my shoulders to emphasize his point.

"Maa, neither do I, Eiji," I replied, as calmly as I could to counter his loud reaction.

"You don't sound like you care, Fujiko! Why are you always so… unemotional?" he complained.

Smiling, I said, "Because you're _too_ emotional, Eiji. There needs to be a balance somewhere."

"I can't win against you nya…" Eiji sighed. "Demo! _I don't want to graduate_!!!"

Later, I found myself walking among the presently bare cherry trees that abounded the grounds for no particular reason. Well, maybe I wanted some privacy to just… think. The time and space to think in peace had been in short supply for a while; next week was graduation for us seniors and there was much preparation going on to that end.

My conversation with Eiji replayed itself in my mind's eye: "I don't want to graduate!"

I didn't want to, either. This school had many memories… fun and painful, happy and sad, angry and resigned as well as joyful and triumphant. I had lived my entire school life here as a boy. I had lied for the whole three years to everybody whom I met since I stepped across the threshold. I had deceived even my best friends, my teammates.

Yet, none of this was new. The same held true for my time in elementary school, where not even Saeki knew I was a girl. Still, somehow I felt as though I had left something unfinished here. It was almost as if I _wanted_ to tell them I was a girl.

Was I getting tired of my masquerade? Would I have the courage to tell these friends with whom I had just about literally shed blood, sweat and tears all the way to the Nationals – these friends who thought I had nothing to hide, that they knew me as well as I knew them – would I truly be able to tell them that I had lied to them for the whole three years I had known them? Would I be able to bear the certain skepticism and suspicion, the hurt and anger that I had never told them the truth?

Would I? _Could _I?

I couldn't. I couldn't face the inevitable distancing, the loss of these people who had come to mean so much to me.

I knew all the other senior regulars' high school applications – all of us were going to the affiliated high school, Seishun Koukou. Tezuka, Inui, Eiji, Kawamura, Oishi – they would definitely make sure that I could no longer pretend to be a male, either because crossdressing was against their principles or because they simply thought it was wrong for girls to act, play and behave as a boy.

And I wouldn't even be able to explain myself, because although I may originally have had a motive, as time went by, it simply became habit. Habit, a shackle for the free, as defined by the devil's dictionary. It had lived up to its name. The smile that always adorned my face was bitter with the irony of it all.

"Fuji-sempai…"

I suppressed the urge to leap a foot into the air with some difficulty and instead settled for whirling around. "Echizen…?"

"You're a girl, aren't you?" The freshman picked his way over the snow towards me, golden eyes meeting mine with confidence in his discovery.

I remained silent, waiting for him to say more.

"You never shower when we're around. You never roll up your sleeves or take off your shirt. You always wear loose-fitting clothes to hide your true shape." He rattled of the reasons dispassionately, almost like Inui. "Yuuta seems to treat you more as a sister than as a brother, even though he calls you Aniki. You look and sound like a girl. Really, Fuji-sempai, it's a wonder nobody else seems to know."

My smile was as artificial as plastic by now, but in an effort to conceal my emotions and thoughts, I held on to it. "You're smart, Echizen."

The cocky brat shrugged. "I know. When are you going to tell them? Or are you going to continue lying all the way to high school; to university; even after you start working?" His eyes burned into mine. "Do you really want to be a pretty boy for the rest of your life?"

The force of his words smashed into my mind, repeating, questioning, _doubting_. With a great effort, I pushed it away, and instead something else floated to the surface – a memory of almost a year ago, when I had first played Echizen.

"Where does your true self lie, Fuji?"

Those words that Tezuka had spoken so long ago returned. At that time – and now, still – I had no answer to give.

**A/N:I hope nobody sounds too OOC. And really, this wasn't supposed to be so angsty. I'll try to cut down… Review please!**


	3. Truth

**Chapter 2: Truth**

I didn't want to be a pretty boy for the rest of my life. Perhaps, I thought, perhaps it was indeed time to show the truth. To let the world know that the almost unbeatable tennis tensai who had played and won in the Nationals was in reality a girl. To prove that girls were as good as – no, better than – boys, if they were born to be, if they tried to be. To show that we were not always the weaker sex.

But the problem was, I had lied for so long that the familiar falsehoods fell from my lips even when I tried to speak the truth.

"Eiji…"

"Hoi, Fujiko-chan? What's up?"

"What would you do if someone told you that I was a girl?"

"Nya, of course I wouldn't believe them! Calling you a girl is a total insult! If anyone called you a girl, tell us and we'll do something about it."

Such response was not exactly encouraging. As such, I procrastinated, delaying longer and longer, always wanting to say something, yet when the moment came when they might actually be receptive, I found that the words were no longer there.

Graduation day came and went, and still I had not said anything. I knew Echizen watched me, waiting, knowing that I was delaying. I pretended – how easily, with so much practice – that I did not notice, that all was right with my world, while behind the serene smile the turmoil raged.

People always said I was creative, but sometimes a good imagination is a bad thing. Every time I thought of telling someone, all the possible reactions from that person and the potential results from those reactions surfaced in my mind, convincing me that it would simply be a self-made disaster if I chose to speak out. Thus I remained silent, half-hoping that someone else would speak for me – that Inui would search for my birth certificate and find that I was actually a girl, that someone would hold a swimming party and force me to go… things that I had originally prevented in my attempts to hold on to my false identity.

In the end, though, Echizen, who seemed to have become impatient with me and chosen to just get it out, over and done with, took matters out of my hands. He told the team after they'd showered (remember I always go in after they're done) when I wasn't around – I suppose I should have been grateful for that one mercy from the blunt freshman. As it was, thing did not turn out the way I expected.

I walked out of the showers only to find my teammates staring at me as if I were something or someone the likes of which they had never seen before. Trying to ignore the sinking feeling, I raised my eyebrows at them, smiling as always. "Is something the matter?"

There was a _very_ strained silence, which Eiji, being the hyper person that he is, broke. He exploded – in more ways than one.

"Fujiko-chan!!! Mou, why didn't you ever tell us? We wouldn't have minded, really we wouldn't!"

"Ouch! Eiji, you do realize that you happen to be bigger than me, right?" With some difficulty I extricated myself from his straitjacket grip, only end up face-to-face with Inui.

"As a penalty for deceiving us, you get to try my latest Inui Juice. "He shoved a glass of potent-looking dark blue liquid into my face. "The Blue Danube."

I smiled wryly. "Your naming sense had taken a sentimental turn, Inui."

Momo was talking to nobody in particular. "I always thought Fuji-sempai was scary, but this is even more scary. How can a girl be so evil?"

"Fssshhhhhhhh…" Kaidoh hissed in assent.

"This is bad, very bad… how will you tell everyone? What will the media do? Will you be okay?" Oishi, ever the mother hen of our team, fussed anxiously at me.

"Well, tomorrow's the last day of school, then it'll be holidays and high school," I reminded him. "I think I'll be okay. Just don't treat me differently."

Eiji glomped me again. "Of course not, Fujiko-chan. I'm too used to you being you; I don't think I _can_ treat you any differently."

"Me too," said Oishi stoically. Kawamura nodded, as did Inui. The sophomores shrugged; Echizen smirked. But there was still someone who was unaccounted for…

"Tezuka?" I ventured, trying to hide my apprehension.

Our silent buchou's mouth tightened, and he turned away. "Do whatever you want," he said emotionlessly. "I'm leaving now."

Tezuka –" Clambering out of Eiji's grip, I went after him. "You're… angry with me?"

Fixing me with fathomless dark eyes, he said tonelessly, "I do not like liars. Now, if you'll excuse me."

"You haven't even heard my reasons!" I flared up at him.

He didn't even turn around. "You don't have any."

I stopped. I really hated it when I couldn't win an argument.

"Fujiko-chan, are you okay?" Eiji peered at me.

"Of course I am; why wouldn't I be?" I smiled at him. But inside, something seemed to break. I'd already lost at least one of my best friends.

Probably he felt betrayed. I think, somehow, with the passage of the years, he'd allowed me to draw closer to him, let me glimpse the tiny curve of his lips which was his version of his smile, permitted me to begin to recognize his moods, to know when he was sad, angry or amused. He must have believed that I had hid nothing from him either.

Now he knew that I had had secrets that he'd never even thought possible. If I knew him well, by now he was mentally berating himself for letting his guard down. The little things that showed I had managed to somehow infiltrate his security – the way he didn't edge away when I stood less than three inches away from him, the way he would let me share an umbrella with him even though if it were anyone else he would just have braved the weather – I had a feeling I wouldn't see them anymore.

"So you've decided to become a girl again?" Yumiko-nee-san smiled happily. "I'm so glad! We can finally behave like real sisters!"

My smile was slightly forced. "Eto… Nee-san, you do realize I have next to no idea of how to be a girl."

"Exactly! That's why I'm going to teach you! We have the whole holidays before you start high school!"

Mother nodded. "She's right, Syuusuke. I'd help if I could, but your father and I have a business trip…"

"We'll be okay, Mother," Yumiko-nee-san reassured her. "Just enjoy yourself. I'll take care of Syuusuke."

"I'm right here, you know…"

"Sorry, Syuusuke. How did your friends take the information?"

"Most of them took it quite well…" Avoiding her eyes, I added more wasabi to my ramen.

"You're not saying everything; you know that I can tell," she reprimanded.

I sighed. "Tezuka was pretty upset."

"Ah well, there had to be at least one," she said sympathetically. "Do you want me to do another tarot reading for you tonight? I'd think that you'd want as much advice about the future as you can get at the moment."

"Thanks, Nee-san," I replied, smiling. "I'd be grateful."

I watched Yumiko-nee-san with some trepidation. Although I did have some foresight, hers was truly scary. Her tarot readings had a record of 100 correct. Anything she predicted would come true. Like all people getting a reading from such a seer, I was at once excited, eager and scared.

The results were… encouraging, in a way.

I slowly digested the information she had given me. "So… in the end, what you are trying to say is that I'll be shunned by some and pursued by others, but at the time when I feel the most painful rejection, I will find the thing that I am looking for in the unlikeliest place?"

"Something like that," she agreed.

"I see. Arigato, Nee-san," I said.

"No problem. It's getting late; try to sleep early. You've gone through quite a bit today."

"Okay. Ja, oyasumi, Nee-san." I bid her goodnight, returning to my own room to think over her words.

**A/N: I think I may be rushing… Reviews are truly appreciated. ******


	4. Discovery

Chapter 3: Discovery 

Learning to be a girl was much harder than it had been to learn to be a boy. When I told my sister as much, she had laughed and reminded me that most girls didn't have to unlearn being a boy.

True to her word, the moment school was out, she had whisked me off to the bewilderingly huge maze of Tokyo's shopping complexes. The key word is _complexes_. Not malls. These giant monstrosities also known as department stores really knew how to make a person feel small. Plus, having been heterosocial for more than half my life, I felt extremely awkward in the throngs of women all busily searching for the best bargains and talking knowledgeably about the latest fashions. After all, it wasn't like I'd paid any attention to this kind of this before.

One good thing about the size and anonymity of these crowds – I was generally able to stay out of the line of sight of those people who I knew by sight to be from Seigaku. Even though my teammates did try to act normally around me even knowing my secret, I still got that different, uncomfortable vibe from them. I was beginning to despair of ever being able to be normal again.

"Syuusuke, would you mind if I left you on your own for a moment? I've got a terrible stomachache…" Yumiko-nee-san pressed a hand to her stomach, her face drained of color.

"Sure, Nee-san. Would you like me to go with you?" I inspected her situation rather worriedly.

"No; I'll be fine. I'll call you when I come out." She passed the bag of clothes we had bought between us to me and hurried off to find a toilet.

"Saa… now, what shall I do while I wait?" I asked myself under my breath. A shop sign caught my eye, and on a sudden impulse I went in.

It was a sports shop, and it had a good stock of tennis equipment. I fingered the latest lightweight rackets with not a little nostalgia – I did love tennis, and now that I had revealed my true sex, the likelihood of ever having those thrilling games against those exceptional boys was almost nonexistent. Inui would probably have given the exact statistics at 0.01. Well, that was an estimate, but in any case the chances were _very_ slim.

A vaguely familiar voice cut through my reverie. "Are? Now this is interesting. Fuji, I didn't know you were a crossdresser."

I turned to meet my accuser, and my eyes flew open. "Yukimura, what on earth are you doing here in Tokyo?"

"I'll tell you if you'll tell me why you're dressed as a girl." Leaning towards me, he smiled disarmingly. "Would it – by chance – have anything to do with your buchou?"

Years of practiced lies made an answer before I could stop. "Pot calls the kettle black, ne, Yukimura? What about you and Sanada?"

The pretty buchou grinned, showing teeth. "Lets sit down and have a proper conversation, why don't we?" With that, he dragged me off to the nearest Starbucks.

"A _girl_?!" Yukimura all but yelled.

I winced. "Keep your voice down, please."

"Sorry. But you have to admit it's quite a shock," he defended.

Warily, I asked, " Are you going to start telling everyone or something?"

He shrugged. "With you dressed like that, they'd know without me saying a word. My team can be rather imaginative, and I suppose that would help."

I glanced at my clothes. They weren't pink and covered in lace and ribbons, so surely I wasn't that obvious. I wasn't even wearing a skirt; my outfit comprised of dark dress pants and a loose blouse, the model of unremarkable. Normally people's eyes would just slide over me, I looked so ordinary and 'just another person in he crowd'. I'd thought it looked rather ambiguous, but apparently this was not so.

Sensing his eyes on me, I looked up. "What?"

"Nothing… I just thought that you really don't make a bad girl," he replied, smiling.

Firmly quashing the urge to flush, I said, "You said that if I told you, you'd tell me why you were here in Tokyo."

"Ah, I nearly forgot. Sanada dragged me here because he wanted to see some kendo master or other and didn't want to go alone," Yukimura explained. Sipping delicately from his cup of frappucino, he continued, "Plus, I wanted to visit the kids in my old hospital. They used to keep me company when my team couldn't come, so it's only right that I return the favor."

"They were hospitalized around the same time as you, ne?" I asked, interested.

"Mm. Most of them should have recovered by now, but there are a few who are there on a long-term basis; those should still be around. Ne – " he smiled,– "want to come with me? I'm going to go and see them now."

I raised an eyebrow. "Saa… the first – the sadist – of the Rikkai Trioka is surprisingly nice when it comes to kids. Who would have known?"

"I _am_ the angel of my school's Trioka… so, will you come?" His wide indigo eyes made refusal impossible, so I nodded.

"Mura-nii-san! Mura-nii-san came!!" Several kids who looked to be between the ages six to ten came running towards us the moment we stepped into the children's play ward.

"Maa maa, I promised I'd come back, didn't I?" Yukimura reminded them, smiling.

One of the younger girls stared accusingly at me. "Mura-nii-san, who is she?"

"Ah, I knew I'd forgotten something. Everyone, this is my friend Fuji Syuusuke."

"Yoroshiku," I said politely.

Immediately I was flooded with a deluge of names as all of them introduced themselves at once.

"Satou Yoshiko –"

"Jun Kagarou –"

"Koushin Rika –"

"Aiko Sakuya–"

"Izuma Yutarou –"

"Kobayashi Taiya –"

"Shuuki Okiyu –"

"Sujuuta Sakuhiko –"

And altogether, they chorused, "Yoroshiku onegaishimasu!"

**A/N: Are the names okay? Is Yukimura OOC? Review!**

**PS: Trioka means 'three demons' if I remember correctly. Fuji is one of Seigaku's Trioka, the other two being Tezuka and Ryoma.**


	5. Friends

Chapter 4: Friends 

The kids actually tried to include me in their games and conversations with Yukimura. However, they did have plenty more to say when I was out of the picture. This I found out when I left to answer the call of nature and happened to hear someone mention my name just before I opened the door to the ward on my way back.

"Mura-nii-san, are you going to marry Fuji-nee-san?" The speaker sounded to be Sakuya.

With an effort, I suppressed the cough that begged to escape my throat.

"Saa… Why do you ask, Sakuya-chan?" Yukimura was definitely smiling. I could hear it in his voice.

"Because when I grow up, I want to marry Mura-nii-san, so Mura-nii-san must wait for me," replied the childish voice. Well, Sakuya _was_ only six, the youngest of the group.

"We'll see," was the remote answer.

"Mou, Sakuya-chan! You promised not to tell Mura-nii-san!" complained another girl, presumably Taiya.

"But if I didn't tell Mura-nii-san anything, he wouldn't have known and he wouldn't wait for us to grow up!"

"It's okay, Taiya-chan, calm down. It's not Sakuya-chan's fault," Yukimura tried to smooth things down.

Good Kami-sama… I tried to recall all the personal information on Yukimura that Inui had had the last time I had peeked at his precious notebooks. He had mentioned that Yukimura did seem inclined towards guys; he _was_ the true bishounen, unlike me, and it was entirely possible.

Suddenly the door opened, and Yukimura was grinning at me. "I knew you were out here," he said triumphantly.

"Saa, I never knew you has extra-sensory perceptions," I smiled.

"Oh, it's not that. I know the normal hospital sounds and what you hear when you have visitors; it's much the same," he explained.

"I see…" Walking into the room, I looked around for Taiya and Sakuya. Both were innocently playing with their dolls as if nothing had happened.

"You heard them, didn't you?" asked Yukimura. "Taiya-chan and Sakuya-chan?"

I did not answer, instead asking, "Did Sakuhiko-kun and Yutarou-kun kick up a fight while I was out?"

He smiled. "That obvious, is it?"

"They wouldn't be ignoring each other like that if they were getting along well," I pointed out. "And maybe you shouldn't tell Taiya-chan and Sakuya-chan you're… not as straight as you could be."

"Be that as it may… I was planning to leave soon; Sanada said to meet him at four. Want to come along?"

Since I didn't really have anything else to do, I agreed. Of course, the kids heard us.

"Mura-nii-san, you're going already?" mourned Sakuya.

"Mataku, you said you'd stay for the whole afternoon!" complained Yutarou.

Yoshiko, the eldest of the girls, said, "Do come back soon, Mura-nii-san; things aren't as fun without you."

We were outside the train station waiting for Sanada to show up. The kids only let us go after making us promise to visit again, and soon. Even me.

"Ne, Fuji, the kids do seem quite taken with you," remarked Yukimura.

"Probably only because I came with you," I demurred. "They really like you."

"I _am_ a famous tennis player – as you are. In fact, I'm actually rather surprised that none of them recognized you," he commented. "They either play or used to play tennis, and they know most of the good players on the scene."

"Well, they're not going to see me anymore – I'll have to play on the girl's team in high school; Tezuka definitely won't hear of me playing as a boy again," I said, attempting to keep the bitterness out of my voice.

It didn't work, because he apparently still heard it. "If it hurts you so, why don't you stay as a boy? Most people already know you as one," he reminded me. "And why won't Tezuka not let you play as a boy anymore? Of all people, I'd have thought he'd know that you love tennis, and that your gender is of no concern."

Before I could think of an answer, a very large and fancy car drew up. The door opened to reveal Sanada – and Atobe Keigo.

"Yo, Genichirou… Hello, Atobe," greeted Yukimura. I saw his eyebrows rise in question.

Sanada looked a bit sheepish. "I ran into Atobe on my way here, and he insisted on fetching me," he muttered.

"Hello, Sanada," I said. A bit late, but I hadn't wanted to interrupt the silent reprimand from Yukimura.

He blinked, stared at me, rubbed his eyes, blinked and stared at me again. It would seem that he was speechless from shock.

"What is going on out there?" demanded an imperious voice. "Ore-sama commands you to get out of Ore-sama's way, Sanada."

"Ah – um – sorry," choked the disconcerted Rikkai fukubuchou, obeying. Atobe climbed out from behind him.

"Hello, Atobe," I greeted, rather enjoying Sanada's reaction and hoping for something similar from Atobe.

I wasn't disappointed. His eyes widened, and he stared at me for a full ten seconds without blinking – or breathing. Feeling slightly concerned, I waved a hand in front of his eyes. "Atobe?"

"_Fuji_?! Ore-sama demands to know what is going on!"

"I would like to know that, too," added Sanada, who seemed to have recovered from his previous distress.

Yukimura smiled. "What say you fetch us home, Atobe, and bring Fuji along for the story? It would certainly provide entertainment for the journey," he suggested.

"An excellent proposition, Yukimura. Go on in," he commanded. "Be awed by the superiority of Ore-sama's car."

There was a collective sweatdrop as we obeyed the egoistical diva. Though it was true that his car was really luxurious, it wasn't as if we wouldn't have realized it if he hadn't told us.

Atobe closed the door behind him, gave the driver his instructions and then raised the partition that ensured some privacy for us without the driver eavesdropping. Settling himself onto the soft, cream-colored leather of the seats, he fixed me with dark silver eyes. "Fuji, spill."

Naturally there was no other course of action, so I spilled.

There was silence after they'd heard everything. I took advantage of this to check the course of our journey; we were still quite a way away.

"You know," said Sanada suddenly, "even though you're a girl, you're one of the best in our year at tennis."

"The cream of the crop, along with Ore-sama," added Atobe. "It'd be a waste for you to play on a girls' team. Why don't you just continue crossdressing, at least for high school? Only your team knows, and Ore-sama is sure that they wouldn't mind at all; after all, you're one of Seigaku's Trioka, and the loss of you would greatly diminish Seigaku's chances in the high school tennis circuit. Even as a rival, Ore-sama would prefer to have some measure of competition."

I shook my head. "Tezuka was not exactly… happy with me. You know how proper he is. He would make sure that Yamato-buchou – the high school team's buchou – knows what I am if I try. And that would mean that the coach would know –"

"Which would in turn lead to the teachers, the principal, and finally the rest of the school knowing," finished Yukimura. "It's the domino effect."

Sanada looked troubled. "Tezuka is right, though. Girls should not participate in boys' tennis. It is against the rules, and if anyone from another team knows, that might be enough to disqualify Seigaku from the competition."

Yukimura elbowed his fukubuchou. "Genichirou, you're supposed to be supportive, not a wet blanket."

"I can't help it, Seiichi. What if I promise that no member of Rikkaidai shall breathe a word of this?"

"Good. If word _does_ get out, I'll know whom to blame," replied his delicate-looking buchou. "There'll be retribution, believe me."

Sanada shivered, and not because he felt cold. Not that it _was_ cold, since Atobe's air-conditioner was set at exactly twenty-four degrees Celsius and these particular seats seemed manufactured to trap heat.

**A/N: Hmm… Sanada is bullied by his pretty buchou, ne? Is the story going too fast? Review!**


	6. choices

Chapter 5: Choices 

"If it's so bad, maybe you could change schools and stay as a boy?" proposed Yukimura after some thought. "A boarding school, preferably not well known?"

"But if I played tennis against Seigaku, they could disqualify me because they know I'm a girl," I reminded him.

"They wouldn't," said Sanada with conviction. "The Nationals trophy that you won with them would be declared null and void once the public knows that there was a girl on the team, and after working so hard to get it, I'm sure that even Tezuka wouldn't want to relinquish it so easily."

Atobe nodded. "Tezuka would likely think of it as undermining his reputation as a buchou. Unless you were in his team again in high school, there is a very slim chance that he would reveal your status as a female to outsiders."

Suddenly I laughed. "You know, you all sound as though you're trying to convince me _not_ to go to Seigaku Koukou."

Yukimura chuckled. "It's perfectly reasonable. You're a magnificent player and student; whichever school you go to, you'd do it credit. And us being the selfish people that we are, we'd all like you to choose our respective high schools over your own."

"Well, you're doing a good job of it so far," I remarked. "I'm almost half convinced to take back my application form to Seigaku Koukou."

"Then we'll work for the other half," smiled the pretty blunette. "Atobe, would you like to go first?"

"Ore-sama indeed deserves that privilege. Now, Fuji, Ore-sama is sure that Hyotei would be greatly pleasured should you choose us," began Atobe. "With your undisputable skills, your place as a regular on our tennis team is assured. As we have boarding facilities, it would be a good choice, since you will still be in Tokyo – albeit further from your house than Seigaku – and able to see your family and friends regularly."

"Is that all?" inquired Yukimura. At Atobe's nod, he turned to me. "Rikkai is also a boarding school, but sufficiently distanced from Tokyo that you wouldn't be bumping into old schoolmates and teammates at every turn. Like Hyotei, your skills would ensure you a spot as a regular on our team."

"Are you done?" I asked when he paused.

He smiled, his entire face lighting up. "No – one more thing we have over Hyotei is –"

"Arn? You have an advantage over Ore-sama?"

" – is that our team is much saner," finished Yukimura, still beaming.

"_What_?! Ore-sama's team _is_ sane!" protested Atobe.

"With you in it, that's pretty much impossible already," I pointed out with as much innocence as I could muster.

Before he could think of an appropriate comeback, the limousine slowed down to a butter-smooth stop. Sanada glanced out of the window. "We're home, Yukimura."

"You go first, Genichirou. I have something to say to Fuji," said his buchou. The other boy nodded and climbed out of the door that the driver had just opened.

The blunette gave the other occupant of the car (excluding the driver) a pointed look. "In private, Atobe.'

His eyebrow twitched. "Ore-sama shall see to Sanada," he said quickly, following the aforementioned boy out of the car.

I watched Yukimura with not a little curiosity. "Private?"

He smiled slowly, and I was suddenly acutely aware of the fact that he was right next to me, with a large expanse of seat on his other side. "Yes."

Hurriedly stamping on my strong urge to blush, I met his eyes defiantly. "What do you want?"

In my stare, I tried to remind him that I was just another tennis player, tried to tell him that I wouldn't swoon at his feet like one of his fangirls – I'd spent years in the company of extremely good-looking boys, and by now was as immune to them as any girl could hope to be. But unfortunately, he didn't seem to notice – either that, or he simply disregarded it.

Leaning closer, he whispered, "Choose Rikkai… We'll be waiting for you, Fuji Syuusuke." His breath ruffled my hair, warm against the sensitive skin of my ear. The very way his soft voice seemed to caress my name made the breath catch in my throat.

This wouldn't do at all! Summoning all the willpower I had, I pushed myself backwards, trying in vain to banish the heat that flared in my face.

As if he'd sensed my need to get away from him, he very considerately shifted back to a more decorous distance, though the teasing, amused smile still adorned his face. Raising his voice to a normal volume again, he repeated, "We'll be waiting for you, Fuji. Ja ne."

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By the time Atobe had gotten back in and ordered the driver to head for home, I had managed to give myself a stern talking-to. "He's not going to try that on me again – it was just emotional blackmail to make me choose Rikkai," I told myself.

What was more troubling was the way he had so easily played me. After all, I'd been among to-die-for guys for years, and I'd never been strongly affected by any. Perhaps I'd learned to be a boy so completely that I almost had the same mindset as they did by now. I knew that I used male words – rougher words; ruder words – and long gotten used to the coarse jokes certain members of that sex seemed to find irreplaceable…

"Fuji." Atobe's sharp voice snapped me out of my musings. "What did Yukimura want with you?"

I shrugged nonchalantly. "He tried to persuade me with more… physical methods, I'd suppose you'd say."

Dark silver eyebrows ascended his smooth forehead. "Ore-sama believes he'd have noticed if Yukimura had done anything of that sort."

Glaring at him, I said, "I did _not_ ask you to think in that way."

"Precisely why Ore-sama did," replied the Hyotei diva. "Personally, Ore-sama does not know why Yukimura chose to use such an approach. Considering the fact that you have only the barest semblance of a teenage female –"

"What is _that_ supposed to mean?!" I demanded.

"Well, for one thing, you have no chest to speak of." He looked pointedly at my front, and I fought the urge to cross my arms over it.

"Atobe, you are being an insensitive ass," I informed him. "Has it not occurred to you that I may just be a late bloomer? There are plenty of girls our age who are as flat as I am."

"None that Ore-sama has seen."

"Well, they're just not part of the cohort of girls who shove their chests into your face, then," I retorted. "Remember, I _did_ have fangirls of my own. I know what they're like."

"Point," he conceded. "Those noisy, demanding sluts… They most certainly do not deserve Ore-sama's –"

"In any case," I said, attempting to get off the uncomfortable topic of my own bodily assets, "how did you find Sanada?"

"Arn? Ore-sama happened to spot him by the road on the way back from a function, and being the infinitely kind soul that I am –" I coughed, but he ignored me " – I told the driver to stop before him. Upon hearing his destination, Ore-sama generously decided to give him a ride, Ore-sama had time to spare."

"Just as well, considering it's already more than an hour since you picked us up," I commented. Then suddenly I remembered something. "Oh! I forgot about Nee-san!"

"Your sister? What happened to her?"

"I left her behind at the shopping mall more than three hours ago… and my cell phone battery is dead…"

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**A/N: Hehe. Yukimura sounds a bit perverted… but he's more fun that way, ne? Poor Yumiko got left behind too… naughty Syuusuke… Review, nya!**

**PS. I may not be able to update regularly… or keep up with all your expectations… so don't kill me, kayz? I know you'd want to; I totally hate unfinished fics T.T**


	7. Scrying

Chapter 6: Scrying 

I flung open the door of my house. "Yumiko-nee-san!"

She looked up from the book she was reading – "The God Delusion" – and smiled at me. "Ah, Syuusuke. Where did you go?"

"Never mind me; what happened to _you_?! I'm really sorry for leaving without telling you, you must have been worried sick –" I knew I sounded very like the anxious mother hen Oishi, but I didn't really care.

"Me? I searched around for a while, then tried scrying in my compact mirror," she replied serenely. "It showed you coming home, exactly as you just did, so I knew that you'd be back soon enough. Did you know you forgot the clothes? Just as well that I managed to find them – in the sports shop."

Immediately, I deflated. Good Kami-sama, I should have known… when your sister is able to scry the future in three different mediums – namely water, crystal and mirrors – it's a very high probability that she'll never be worried about what happens to you, even when she's not there to supervise.

Yuuta came home to dinner, which was a good thing because I wanted to discuss the option of changing high schools with my whole family. Not that I wouldn't have wanted him there otherwise. In any case, my parents were both away, so the family circle was still incomplete.

Nevertheless, I still broached the subject to them. "Ne, Nee-san, Yuuta; do you think it'd be a good idea for me to continue crossdressing, but transfer schools so that the secret wouldn't leak out?"

"_What_?! But I thought you said that you'd be a girl for high school!" exclaimed Yuuta. "And you've already told you teammates, haven't you? You can't take it back anymore! They know!"

Yumiko-nee-san, on the other hand, slowly chewed the mouthful of fish she'd just consumed and swallowed it before saying thoughtfully, "That idea does bear some consideration."

"Nee-san! How could you say that?!" demanded Yuuta. "Aniki –"

"By rights I should be Ane," I commented. "But I don't really mind."

Yuuta shrugged my remark off as if it was an irritating fly. "Oh, to heck with that. _Nee-san_ –"

"Hush, Yuuta. Hear Syuusuke out first," admonished Yumiko-nee-san. "What schools are you considering?"

"Well, Hyotei's Atobe and Rikkai's Yukimura both tried to convince me to join their respective teams," I explained. "Personally, I wouldn't mind either of them – they each have their pros and cons."

"Why don't you just stick to Seigaku Koukou and get it over with?" grumbled Yuuta.

"I think I'd do better as a boy, at least in public," I replied. "I can't unlearn being a boy so easily. And you see, these people already know I'm a girl, but they don't mind at all. They want me on their team, Nee-san…" Why did I sound as though I were begging?

"Let me think about it; I'll tell you tomorrow," said Yumiko-nee-san – which, translated, meant that she was going to scry for it.

Yuuta was still adamant. "Just be a girl, why don't you!"

Puzzled by his obstinate views in this particular matter, I asked, "Why do you want me to be a girl so badly? I'd have thought you're more used to having a brother than a sister…"

"I just think that you ought to be who you really are!" he protested, blushing suspiciously.

"Never mind, Yuuta – I'll find out sooner or later," I told him, smiling. Inside, though, I wondered – who was I, really? A female, and proud of it? A girl who wished she had been born a boy? A person who just simply couldn't decide?

I was both all of them and yet none of them at the same time.

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The next day, Yumiko-nee-san left for yoga early in the morning before either Yuuta or I woke up, so we didn't have the chance to interrogate her about her little scrying session the night before. On top of that, Yuuta was on edge all through our late breakfast, and I was curious as to why.

"Ne, Yuuta, why are you so jumpy today? Did you have a bad dream?" I asked, half-jokingly.

He nearly leapt out of his seat. "Aniki, don't scare me like that –"

"Saa… I scared you? Since when were you so easily scared?" I countered.

A flush was creeping up his face. "I wasn't –"

"Then why did you say so?"

"I – I – Stop interrogating me!" he finally exclaimed. "I'm jumpy because I told Mizuki-san that you're a girl, okay?"

This time it was I who nearly fell out of my chair. Spitting out of the mouthful of water I'd just drunk, I choked, "You… you told _Mizuki_?!!"

His face was now beet red in color. "_Yes_! Are you satisfied now?!"

"You – okay, wait." I took a deep breath in an attempt to control myself. Opening my eyes, I smiled dangerously. "Yuuta… You're my brother, and I'd hate to have to do anything to you, but drastic times call for drastic measures. In case you've forgotten, that purple freak has an unquenchable thirst for _data_. Any kind of data, inclusive of _personal _data."

"Yes…?" Yuuta looked puzzled. "So how does _that_ relate to you being a girl – oh."

'Oh, indeed." Shaking my head sadly at his ignorance, I continued, speaking as though to a young child. "He'd make sure that the whole city knows – no, the whole _country_ would be more like it. And then were would I be?"

He shuffled his feet, apparently having discovered something very interesting in his fingernails. "Eto… in Seigaku Koukou?" he ventured hopefully.

I kicked him. "Baka. I'd be in _court_, by the eight arms of the goddess of mercy. With innumerable charges, such as indecency."

"Ouch! What goddess has eight arms, anyway?"

"Kwanyin, the Chinese goddess of mercy," I answered. "But that is _not_ the point of contention. Of all people, why _Mizuki_ – "

The doorbell rang, and without waiting for an answer, the purple freak walked in, all decked out in his favorite color – radioactive purple.

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He stared at me. I stared right back at him, meeting him eye for eye. Electricity crackled throughout the room, and Yuuta was backing away, his hair rising slightly from the high voltage.

"So, what are you going to do about it?" I bit out.

"About what?" That purple freak was definitely depriving a certain village somewhere of its idiot. He actually thought he could pretend not to know?

"You know that I'm a girl, don't you?" I demanded. "Don't you dare deny it; Yuuta told me that you know."

"Oh yes, that little matter of your questionable gender." Twirling his hair in that despicably condescending manner of his, he said, "I have taken the liberty of –"

"Of what?" I asked dangerously. If he'd notified all the news anchors and tennis organizations, I would have no choice but to wring his neck like a chicken for the pot. I'd probably enjoy doing it, too.

"Of keeping that particular data to myself," he finished. "I always take pride in having data that other people do not. Also, there is the more important issue of your tennis –"

"In other words, you just don't want other people to know that you got trashed by a girl," I cut across him, hiding my relief with a sharp tone.

The purple freak shrugged nonchalantly. " Well, that can't hurt. It's a win-win situation after all."

He did have a point there. Not that I was about to admit it.

"In any case, I can see how you managed to conceal your true sex," he continued meditatively. "Most teenage females of our age would have a chest to waist to hip ratio of –"

Not wanting to go into a discussion of my bodily assets – or rather, my lack thereof – for the second time in two days, I grabbed a convenient ball cactus on the nearby windowsill and efficiently stuffed his mouth up, ignoring the eardrum-bursting scream that resulted.

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It had been with some reluctance that I'd let Yuuta leave for the street tennis courts with the purple freak, who had somehow managed to stage a miraculous recovery a few hours after the cactus episode – albeit he wouldn't be able to talk normally for the rest of the holidays without feeling some pain. I got a measure of fierce pleasure out of the fact that he still paid for his knowledge of my secret – paid in blood, no less.

I'd mooched around the house for a while, not quite bored enough to watch the mind-numbingly dull television programs on air at the time, yet not quite able to get up the courage to call Eiji or go for a walk. After all, Yumiko-nee-san might come back at any moment, and until I knew what school I should choose, I didn't think I'd be able to carry a normal conversation with my best friend.

By the time three o'clock rolled around, I was out of the house and in the backyard, just about bored out of my mind. Yumiko-nee-san wasn't answering her cell phone; I couldn't focus on any of my books, games or music – or rather, on _anything_ – until Yumiko-nee-san told me of her scrying results.

Would I go to Hyotei, Rikkai or Seigaku's respective high schools, or to somewhere else entirely? Would I continue as a crossdresser, or would I revert to my original gender? Would the people accept me?

Sakura petals shook themselves loose from the branches above me, drifting down, lifted by the warm spring breeze. The smell of freshness enveloped me – the heady sweetness of the flowers, the clean sharpness of the grass, and the dark, earthy undertones of the honest dirt beneath them all.

Springtime, a time for new beginnings. Perhaps I had indeed chosen an auspicious time to reveal my true sex to my friends… Soft petals caressed my closed eyelids, gentle as a loving hand, and I smiled.

"Syuusuke?" Footsteps sounded; I sat up on the wooden bench where I'd originally been lying.

"Nee-san? Where were you?" I inquired.

"Ah, my friend introduced me to one of her colleagues. He's smart, and not to mention easy on the eyes," she replied, sitting down beside me.

I raised an eyebrow. "Saa… you're interested in someone, ne?"

She coughed somewhat embarrassedly. "Anyway, I'm sure you want to know what I found for you last night, right?"

My eyes flicked open in anticipation. "Of course. I've been waiting the whole day, Nee-san."

"You have? I'm sorry, Syuusuke," she apologized, looking genuinely contrite. "I was rather diverted by Ryuuji – that's his name, Kohaku Ryuuji."

Ryuuji? So they were on first-name terms already… but I could tease Yumiko-nee-san later, _after_ she told me what she'd found. "Oh, I see. So what did you scry for me?" I asked.

Suddenly, she wouldn't meet my eyes, seemingly developing a strange fascination with the petal-strewn grass around us. "Nee-san?" I repeated. "What did you see?"

"I saw…" Her voice was halting, soft and faltering. "I saw you… in the uniform of Shuubijou Gakuen."

"Shuubijou… Gakuen…?" I echoed slowly. "Isn't that… the all-girls boarding school on the outskirts of Tokyo?"

She nodded. "Yes, it was their uniform you were wearing, and their school gates you were entering."

I buried my face in my hands. Now I knew what she has scried… but it was in no way what I'd expected.

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"I'm going to an all-girls high school… and of all the all-girls high schools there are here, it _has_ to be Shuubijou Gakuen," I grumbled to myself in the privacy of my own bedroom.

Shuubijou… its kanji characters were 秀美娘, literally meaning 'beautiful lady'. And I, a crossdresser with almost a decade of experience, was going to attend it.

Kami-sama, I decided, could be a truly sadistic bitch at times.

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**A/N: Saa... I decided against sending her to either Rikkaidai or Hyotei in the end… it'd be different from the other crossdresser fics, this way. XD Review, please!**

**PS. I know I said that this chapter would be called 'Decision', but I changed my mind. It wasn't as if she was the one making the decision here; more like Yumiko scried it.**

**PPS. If the scrying is too supernatural, sorry… it seemed more interesting to make Yumiko able to actually scry the future. Yeah. :-X**


	8. Figure

Chapter 7: Figure 

"I won't go," I repeated for the _n_th time.

"You will eventually," replied Yumiko-nee-san. "My predictions are never wrong."

"There's a first time for everything!" I said obstinately.

"Not in this case," she said with absolute confidence in herself. "It'll happen, Syuusuke. It's not even as if it's outside the imagination. Plenty of girls go to Shuubijou."

"It's a _girls' school_, which might just explain _why_ so many _girls _go," I retorted. "Nee-san, I've been heterosocial for more than half my life. Do you actually think I can so easily step into a completely female environment?"

She smiled. "You're a tensai, aren't you? You can do it."

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Staring up at the huge gold-plated gates of Shuubijou Gakuen, I heaved a resigned sigh and walked in, impatiently tugging at the indecently short skirt of the uniform.

"I just hope nobody I know will ever see me in this," I muttered blackly. "I'll never live it down."

(Flashback)

"Unya, Fujiko-chan, I still can't get used to thinking of you as a girl," complained Eiji for the dozenth time.

I finally snapped. "Then just don't. Think of me as a boy. I already look almost like one, don't I?!"

He backed off in a hurry. "Sorry, Fujiko-chan; I didn't mean that! You look like a girl, really you do!"

"Well, Atobe and Mizuki obviously don't think so," I said bitterly, still pretty pissed at them over that particular subject.

"They just didn't look closely," he said reassuringly. "Maybe you ought to wear skirts and, like, clingier clothes?"

I stared at him. "You know, Eiji, that just sounds wrong."

"N-no! I wasn't thinking that way! Nya, Fuuuujiko-chaaaaaaan!!!" he whined. "Stop _doing_ that kind of thing!"

Relenting, I smiled. "Okay, I'll stop. But no, I am _not_ going to wear a skirt. I feel indecent in skinny jeans, for heaven's sake."

"But you'd look nice!" cried Eiji.

"And how would _you_ know?"

"Eh? Fuuuujiko-chaaaaaaaaaaaan!!!! You said you'd stop!!!"

"Saa… gomen ne?" I grinned, but there and then made up my mind never to let anyone I knew see me in a skirt.

(End Flashback)

It was actually a good thing that Shuubijou was not actually _in_ Tokyo – there was a much slimmer chance of my bumping into my teammates; a much smaller window of opportunity for being spotted by former schoolmates.

I'd come to the school during the holidays to apply for entry, and having received it almost immediately, I'd been shown around the compound by a helpful staff member. I'd thought I'd know where things were and what was going on by now – but I was proven wrong.

How could the mere presence of people change the look of an area so drastically? There were students, teachers, parents _everywhere_ – I was hard pressed to recognize the place at all. Instinctively I hunched over, trying to hide in plain sight.

It was futile. Almost immediately, a teacher spotted me and bustled over. "A newbie, aren't you? For high school? This way; follow me." She towed me in the direction of the high school block – Shuubijou Gakuen consisted of grade and middle schools as well as high school.

We waded through the sea of people and managed to arrive more or less safely in the high school hall. The teacher finally let go of me and instead turned to inspect me closely. "What's your name?"

"Fuji Syuusuke," I replied, hoping that she wouldn't have any idea of who I was.

No such luck – my name had been broadcast over the whole of Japan in the Kantou and National finals, along with the rest of my teammates. Her eyebrows soared so high that they vanished into her red-dyed hairline. "Fuji Syuusuke…? This had better not be a joke, girl. Everyone knows that tennis tensai Fuji Syuusuke is a boy, no matter how feminine he looks."

"I _am_ Fuji Syuusuke," I said, looking as earnest as I could. "Really. And I'm a girl, too. Do you want me to show – "

"W-well, I r-really don't think there's any _need_ to go to such m-measures," she stuttered, fumbling with her wire-rimmed spectacles. "I think this needs to be checked with the principal. Wait here, please." With that, she hurried off, disappearing into the crowd.

Amused by her reaction, I leaned against a wall, where I could unobtrusively observe the room. A group not too far off squealed in delight at a poster I couldn't see – obviously some famous star. Closer to me, a brunette was blushingly confessing something to her grinning friends. Further off, a dark-haired girl sat in the corner of the hall, books open around her and writing busily.

Intrigued by the odd difference in behavioral patterns – remember, I'd had next to no normal interaction with people of the same gender – I strolled over to get a closer look.

When I reached her, I crouched down, pleased that I'd remembered to wear shorts under the miniscule skirt. "Saa… Is there always homework to hand up on the first day of school?" I inquired.

Her head jerked up; apparently she hadn't noticed my approach. "Wha… who in the wonks are _you_?!"

I smiled pleasantly at her. She seemed to be more outspoken than most girls I'd seen. "I'm Fuji Syuusuke. And you?"

"Hideko Misaki." Still suspicious, she stared at me defiantly. Her eyes shifted over me – perhaps trying to place my name and face, but apparently unable to do so. Which was good, because that meant she didn't know who I was.

"You're also a new girl, ne?" I asked, sitting down and crossing my legs.

She blinked, then frowned. "Are you a lesbian?"

My eyes snapped open; had I been standing, I'd probably have sat down hard. Good Kami-sama… this girl was _really_ blunt. Most people would have put it in a rather more _indirect_ manner.

Mustering as much composure as I could in the face of such a strange accusation, I said, "You didn't answer my question, Hideko-chan."

"No, I'm _not _new, and _you_ didn't answer _my_ question either. Well?" Folding her arms across her chest, she shot me an accusatory look. "Lesbian?"

"I'm perfectly straight," I assured her. "But why did you ask, anyway? Are there a lot of them here?"

"It's a girls' school. There's bound to be _some_, what with the absence of a healthy interaction with the opposite sex. Especially if you've been here since grade school," was the nonchalant reply. "Plus, you look like one."

Curious, I asked, "What _do_ they look like?"

"Look in the mirror and you'll know."

"It was an entirely reasonable question," I retorted. "And I want an answer."

Sighing exasperatedly, she set aside her book and began rattling off reasons with absolutely no feeling in her voice. "You walk and talk like a boy. You don't have the body shape. And you've got much more muscles than most normal girls." At this last, she glanced pointedly at my legs.

I followed her gaze and grimaced when I realized that she did have a point. All those laps and other grueling training exercises under the threat of Inui Juice had really given me the lean, hard muscles that I relied on for tennis – and this was the first time I'd shown so much skin in public after leaving middle school, since I preferred long slacks or jeans and long sleeves to counter the remaining chill in the mornings.

Also, the talking and acting like a boy was true. I still used the more casual – a. k. a. more masculine – word "僕" instead of the politer – a. k. a more feminine – word "私" when referring to myself; I still sat cross-legged, something usually considered indecent for girls.

Oh, Kami-sama… I was going to have to undergo a major makeover, behavior-wise. The muscles, on the other hand, I would like to keep – if I ever play tennis again, I'd need them.

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**A/N: That was definitely the suckiest chapter in this fic. (hides in a dark emo corner) Please review anyway, even if it's to complain. I'm not averse to deleting and rewriting chapters… though if it were avoidable, that'd be good…**

**PS. "****僕" ****(boku) is one of the male words for 'me' or 'I'; Fuji uses this one (other characters use "****俺" ****(ore) which is rougher). "****私" ****is the formal (polite) way for saying 'me' or 'I' and is normally used by females or when speaking to a superior. Sexist, isn't it?**

**PPS. Sitting cross-legged for females **_**is**_** considered indecent. Girls are expected to kneel or at least keep their knees together. Males sit cross-legged. Oh, this is definitely gender discrimination… girls have to cut their own blood circulation! T.T**


	9. Found

Chapter 8: Found 

Before I'd spent a week in Shuubijou, I was greatly regretting that I'd taken up Yumiko-nee-san's challenge to go and prove that I could do anything, just because I was a tensai. There were some things beyond tensais… and _this _was one of them. Good Kami-sama; I'd gotten accusations of homosexuality almost daily! It was truly embarrassing to walk down a corridor minding your own business and suddenly hear someone shouting "_Lesbian!!_" at you – and when you turned around, no one would meet your eyes.

The only exception so far to this trend was Hideko Misaki. She was never polite – I'd realized that the first time I met her – but when she said something, it was true. She wasn't a gossipmonger, nor did she exaggerate things; she was blunt-worded but talked straight.

Happily, these first few days were only orientation for us high school freshmen, so the fact that I was the famous tennis tensai Fuji Syuusuke hadn't been spread around; not much, anyway. Or at least, I hoped not. Hideko knew, that was for sure – but it being Hideko, she wasn't likely to spread it around much. She'd taken the revelation with as much calm as had my old teammates. For the moment, though, I did my best to stay anonymous in this huge group of girls.

Even after only four days of observation, I'd learned quite a lot of new things about this strange, unfamiliar world completely made up of females. I'd never really experienced firsthand a girls' catfight – one occurred during break on the second day. Two of our fellow freshmen were yelling at each other, flushed with anger; screeching like crows. When I asked Hideko later, she told me that they had been fighting over another girl's older brother.

"So girls really _are_ as shallow as I'd thought," I'd said, shaking my head.

Hideko had shrugged. "Some are. Some aren't. You opinion will depend on which one gives the more lasting impression."

"My only experience with girls worth speaking of before I came here was with my sister and my fangirls," I'd admitted. "Nee-san's a famous seer, and she's about as smart as I am –"

"Which means she's _smart_," she'd commented. "You're a tensai, after all."

I'd chuckled slightly. "Maa… the fangirls were so shallow, they could probably reflect themselves. I personally tried to ignore them as best as I could."

"I assume this means that you've never had a very good impression of your own sex," had been the cool remark.

She was right. I hadn't – but was it really my fault?

A voice at the back of my head laughed maniacally. You're still trying to put the blame on someone else? On fate? Well, too bad. It's your own fault and you ought to learn how to deal with it.

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I picked up the ringing cell phone and checked the caller ID. It was Eiji. I rejected the call and collapsed onto my bed with a deep sigh.

My old teammates had been calling almost incessantly for three days running, immediately after they'd found I'd withdrawn the application to Seigaku Koukou. Not just them, either; Yukimura and Atobe had both called too, to ask which school I'd chosen – but no way was I about to let them know I'd gone to Shuubijou.

I'd surely never be able to live it down… plus, they'd find out soon enough without any information from me. Seigaku's Inui and Rikkai's Yanagi were both data maniacs and experts at finding out things without permission from people, while Atobe had a legion of secret agents and spies at his beck and call. It was only a matter of time before someone came storming in to demand why the (bleep)ing hell had I chosen an all-girls' school and deprive the high school tennis circuit of my talents.

This was truly much more troublesome than if I'd turned down Yumiko-nee-san's challenge and gone to Rikkai or Hyotei. Had I done so, the team I chose would easily fend off the others, not wanting to let go of their prize.

Was I half wishing that someone would march into Shuubijou, toss me into a car and drive me off to another school? It wasn't really unrealistic – Atobe would have no qualms about doing such a thing. Who knew? He might actually do that. My knight in shining armor… oh, what a stupid thought. I shoved it to the back of my mind and reached for my cell phone, which had begun ringing yet again.

It was Atobe. Feeling rather irritated, I rejected the call. If they were really desperate to speak to me, well, it wasn't as though my house's location was classified information – anyone could just walk in if they wanted to.

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When I walked out the school gates after school the next day, I noticed a large group of girls fangirling over something… or somebody. Curious, I headed over for a closer look – but was arrested by a hand on my shoulder. Looking around, I saw Hideko.

"There're some guys over there. That's why everyone's squealing," she explained, as if knowing exactly what I had been about to ask.

"Guys? What are they doing here?" I asked, rather puzzled.

"I don't know. Perhaps they are looking for girlfriends," was the cynical reply. "But it won't hurt to check it out – of course, there is always the danger of getting trampled by fangirls…"

Ignoring the second part of her sentence, I headed towards the huge group. Hideko followed me silently.

"Kyaaa, he's so _hawt_!" exclaimed a girl next to me.

Beside her, her friend bounced excitedly. "What's his name? I'm going to cover my notebook with it!"

I quickly shoved past them, making my way towards the hub of the group. When I saw who it was, though, I froze, and Hideko, who'd been following in the path I'd carved through the other girls, walked into me. "What happened?"

There, surrounded by females, stood Atobe Keigo, looking as coolly aloof as he always did. Next to him was Kabaji, blank and subservient to Atobe as usual. And a slight distance away from them, Oshitari Yuushi leaned against the wall beside the gate, with his patented bored-but-mysterious look on.

Good Kami-sama, what on earth was Hyotei doing in front of Shuubijou's school gates?!

Suddenly Atobe turned, and our eyes met. His eyebrows rose slightly before he smiled – or perhaps 'smirk' would be a better word. Turning to Kabaji, he said something inaudible under the thrilled squeals of the girls around. The huge boy nodded, lips forming his trademark word 'Usu', then walked towards me.

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"I can't believe you did what you did," I repeated for the umpteenth time.

Atobe just smirked. "Did you never think Ore-sama would do such a thing? Ah… Tensai Fuji Syuusuke is losing her grip in this unconducive environment…"

Glaring at him, I retorted, "You didn't need to do it in front of half the school."

(Flashback)

Kabaji lumbered towards me, and instinctively I tried to push back out of the crowd to safety. Unfortunately, it seemed that more girls had joined in, and thus getting out of there was perhaps as futile as parting the Red Sea for someone who _wasn't_ Moses.

"What's wrong?" asked Hideko, pressed up beside me in the crush.

"I need to get out of here," I explained, shoving a smaller girl out of my path and stumbling into a momentarily empty space.

"Is the big guy after you?" she inquired, still keeping her composure as she followed me again.

I quickly hopped into another opening. "You could say that."

However, I'd just managed to reach the outskirts of the huge group when Kabaji appeared in front of me. "Kabaji-kun, what –"

"Usu." The giant grabbed hold of my collar and held me up in the air off the ground. Hideko was gaping in shock; most of the other girls didn't even seem to notice, fixed as they were on Atobe and Oshitari.

"Let me down, Kabaji-kun," I gritted, grimly hanging onto the mask of politeness.

"Wait there, Kabaji," came the familiar, imperious voice – Atobe. Twisting around in Kabaji's grip, I saw him walking through the magically opened path in the crowd, Oshitari behind him.

"Usu," replied the huge guy, and he obediently waited for the diva of Hyotei to reach us. I could feel everyone's eyes fixed on me in curiosity and amusement; I prayed that nothing more humiliating might happen.

My prayers went unanswered, for Atobe snapped his fingers to call up his limousine. When the chauffeur opened the door, the silver-haired boy gestured to Kabaji – and the giant tossed me into the car, much like a bag of trash.

The three boys followed swiftly; as the door closed behind them, I could see the shocked faces of the fangirls and the amused one of Hideko.

(End Flashback)

"Good Kami-sama, Atobe, I think I've died of embarrassment and come back to life," I grumbled. "Wasn't there a more _civilized_ way to go about this?!"

"Considering it was _you_, I didn't bother," retorted the diva. "And it was effective enough. Na, Yuushi?"

"Finally remembered I exist…" remarked the blunette. "It would have been more interesting if you'd kissed Fuji in front of all those fangirls, though."

Atobe sighed in exasperation. "This is _not_ one of your trashy romance novels, no matter how much you wish it was."

"I never said it was. It _would_ have been more interesting," defended Oshitari. "Probably the only interesting thing about this little excursion."

His buchou – or perhaps not his buchou any longer, since they were now in high school – ignored the comment. "Anyway, Fuji, you shall be coming with us to my mansion. You can't have expected us to believe you'd come here of your own accord."

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**A/N: My writing is deteriorating… T.T I'm sorry; I know that this chapter is really not up to standard. But in any case, now Fujiko's going to Hyotei – for the moment, anyway… XD**

**Those who were complaining about the lack of boys, well, here they are. I hope it's okay… :-X**

**Reviews are truly loved!! **


	10. Conference

Chapter 9: Conference 

"Ne Atobe, why of all your team did you bring Oshitari?" I inquired, curious – and a tad bored too, since it was taking a while to get from one side of Tokyo to the other. Shuubijou was on the southern outskirts of the capital; Atobe's mansion on the northern – even Atobe, rich as he was, would take at least three hours by car to get there. Of course, if he decided to go by helicopter, it would be _much_ faster.

The blunette looked vaguely affronted. "Do you have a problem with my presence?"

"Ore-sama brought Yuushi because Ore-sama decided that someone more favored by females would be a good accessory when visiting an all-girls' school," said the silver-haired diva. "Naturally, Ore-sama's predictions were spot-on."

"Do you mean that you _wanted_ that troop of fawning girls?!" I demanded.

"Well, having them caught your attention. Not that we _wouldn't_ have without them, of course," he replied.

"So, I was just an _accessory_," repeated Oshitari, sighing dramatically. "Why am I not surprised?"

I laughed at his spectacular comedown from fukubuchou to accessory. "Don't worry, Oshitari. You make a good accessory."

"I shall take that as a compliment."

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When we finally reached the mansion, I followed the three boys, admiring the grand décor meant to awe any visitors to the place. Well, considering that it was _Atobe_, it wasn't something unimaginable.

The maid that had accompanied us curtseyed low as she showed us into a large, brightly lit room. Huge French windows allowed the late afternoon sun in, glittering off the gilded furniture and making the deep velvet of the cushions glow richly. And around the room – standing, sitting, reclining – were the rest of the old Hyotei regulars, Shishido, Ootori, Gakuto, Jirou, and Hiyoshi.

My eyes flicked open on sight of them. Weren't Ootori and Hiyoshi supposed to be in middle school? And surely not _all_ of them were automatically high school regulars. For heaven's sake, it was only the first Friday of the school year! They certainly wouldn't have had time to hold so many tryouts, not with the ginormous tennis club they had in Hyotei.

A breath tickled my ear. "Atobe invited the second years because they are part of our old team. The high school tryouts haven't begun yet," came a low whisper.

I held myself perfectly still, realizing that the blunette was barely an inch behind me and that if I moved the slightest bit I'd brush against him. What on _earth_ was he thinking?! He was so close I could just about feel his body heat – wait, perhaps that was his _point_. Good Kami-sama, Inui's notebooks really hadn't lied when they said that Oshitari was a womanizer.

"Now, Ore-sama has generously agreed with Yukimura and Tezuka on having a meeting here in Ore-sama's mansion." Atobe lowered himself elegantly into a russet velvet couch next to a snoozing Jirou. "They will, naturally, bring their own former teams to the conference. You people –" here he looked around at the other occupants of the room " – are on strict orders to behave yourself."

"A question, Atobe," I said, before he could go on with his monologue. "This meeting is about… what, exactly?" Was it about me? I wondered silently.

"You, obviously," he answered, looking surprised that I hadn't figured it out for myself.

"_What_ about me?" I demanded, sensing that I was out of my depth.

"Who gets you, of course," he replied. "We all want you. To have you go to Shuubijou is something we have all agreed is a criminal waste of your talent."

"You sound like I'm a… _geisha_ whose favors are extremely sought for," I said contemplatively.

"In a way, that's the idea," observed Oshitari. "By the way, Atobe, you may have more guests than originally intended."

"And why?"

The Kansai boy shrugged, sitting down in a vacant armchair. "I told Kenya by accident, and knowing Kenya, he'd definitely inform Shiraishi –"

"Which adds Shitenhouji to our happy circle," I finished dryly. "Wonderful." Knowing these guys, they're not going to want to lose, not even in such a trivial matter, I thought. This is going to be troublesome.

"Na, Yuushi, I didn't know you were such a gossipmonger," commented Gakuto.

"What exactly did you tell him?" asked Ootori. "Did you mention that Fuji-san is a… girl?" He glanced at me when he said that last, and quickly looked away, blushing deeply.

I grinned inwardly; it was actually quite fun to watch these people get unnerved at the sight of me in a skirt. Obviously he still unconsciously thought of me as a boy, even though he had been told that I was not.

"I can't remember," said Oshitari carelessly. "But I'm pretty sure they know – or they will, once they get here."

"But Shitenhouji is from Osaka; they can't just uproot and come," I pointed out.

"You never know how these Osaka people work," said Shishido darkly. "They can do _anything_. Well, just about. They couldn't beat you lot."

"In any case, when is everyone else supposed to arrive?" I inquired. "Nobody's here yet, apart from you people."

Atobe checked his expensive silver Tag Heuer watch. "Soon. They said they'd come after tennis practice."

"How come Hyotei doesn't have tennis practice?" I wondered aloud.

"Coach was sick," answered Hiyoshi tersely. "No relief coach."

"…I see."

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"Hoi hoi!! Fujiko-chan, we missed you so!!" Barely had the door to the room –apparently called a 'solar' – opened to reveal the blue and white of Seigaku jerseys when I was bowled over by the overenthusiastic glomp I remembered so well.

Pinned down by my old friend's weight, I smiled up at him. "Hello, Eiji."

"E-Eiji! Don't do that! You might have done permanent damage to Fuji!" scolded Oishi, tugging his doubles partner off me.

"Not to mention that it looks rather indecent," quipped Gakuto. It seemed that he and Eiji still weren't on very good terms.

Echizen tugged at his cap. "Mada mada dane, Kikumaru-sempai. Chez."

"Do you not have a better greeting in the face of Ore-sama, brat?" demanded Atobe.

"Monkey King. Yo, Fuji-sempai."

I sat up, laughing at the look on Atobe's face. "Hello, Echizen."

"Is there any food around here? Buchou rushed us off without dinner!" complained Momo.

"It's your own fault you have a hole for a stomach, fshhhhhh…" muttered Kaidoh.

"Say that again, Mamushi!"

"Momo, Kaidoh, please!" Oishi entreated, hurriedly stepping between them. "Just think of the amount you'll have to pay if you break anything in this room –"

Inui adjusted his spectacles. "I have estimated the cost at US$1000 and above."

Eiji was staring at me with huge eyes. "Nya, Fujiko-chan, I _told_ you you'd look nice in a skirt!"

"Thank you, I think," I replied, standing. When he quickly averted his eyes, I chuckled. "I'm wearing shorts underneath it, silly. I'm not used to it yet; it still feels indecent."

"Oh." He was staring unashamedly at the ultra-feminine uniform; I twitched slightly, wondering why his scrutiny felt more uncomfortable than that of Hyotei.

"It's rude to stare, Kikumaru," said a deep voice behind him.

"Ah, mengo mengo, buchou!" apologized Eiji, grinning at me and bouncing off towards Momo. "Nya, _Momo_, don't hog the sandwiches!"

"I only want the ham! You can have those with weird orangey stuff, Eiji-sempai!"

"Uwah? What _is_ that?! I want the ham too, nya!"

Atobe sniffed. "After Ore-sama went through all the trouble to order caviar, all they can think of is _ham_. Your teammates are uncivilized morons, Tezuka. All except Fuji, anyway – she knows how to appreciate Ore-sama's generosity."

My eyebrows rose; all I'd done was remark that Atobe was very lavish when it came to entertainment. However, I decided not to comment on this, and instead turned to my former buchou. "Tezuka."

Fathomless mahogany eyes met mine. "Fuji."

Was it because I hadn't seen him for a while and been in very bad female company, that I felt myself shiver a little under his gaze? He's just another guy, I admonished myself silently. Our team's best buchou. Just another of the many amazing guys with whom I'd spent my middle school years.

I didn't melt at the sight of Atobe or Oshitari, though if I looked at them from my present schoolmates viewpoint, both _were_ seriously hot. I certainly didn't coo over Eiji or Ootori, who would be considered 'cuties'. So why in the name of Kami-sama was I going to pieces over my buchou?!

Before I could continue my self-analysis, the door opened again, and the Rikkaidai team trooped in. Yukimura spotted me easily. "Ah, so you _did_ decide to become a girl again," he commented. "Hello, Atobe, Tezuka."

"Yukimura."

Kirihara peered at me. "You just look like a crossdressing guy. I _can't_ believe a _girl_ beat me!!" he moaned.

"Hey, she beat _me_ too," Niou reminded his kouhai, cuffing him over the head. "Don't complain. At least you can say you're younger; I can't."

Marui popped his bubblegum. "Y' know, with Mura-buchou around, nobody looks like a girl, not even you… 'specially when Sanada-fukubuchou's with Mura-buchou…"

"Care to repeat that, Bunta?" invited Yukimura, smiling dangerously. Sanada shot the culprit a glare that spelt death, and soon.

The redhead immediately backpedaled. "N-no! I'm sorry!"

His pretty buchou grinned. "Good. Now, shall we?"

"Ore-sama wouldn't mind, but Yuushi here has apparently leaked information to Shitenhouji, and they may or may not be joining us," explained Atobe.

I stifled a laugh as the three buchous all fixed Oshitari with their own individual death glares – namely, Tezuka's 'You are about to run a thousand laps' patented glare, Yukimura's 'Your training menu has just been doubled' sadistic smile, and Atobe's 'You are unworthy of Ore-sama's attention' snooty stare.

Amazingly, though, the Hyotei tensai didn't seem remotely affected – he only readjusted his glasses, smiling mysteriously.

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**A/N: Only when I wrote this chapter did I realize how much I missed playing with my boys. :-X sorry for depriving my beloved readers of having them around…**

**Don't know why I added Shitenhouji, really. I just rewatched OVA 15 and thought that Fuji **_**really**_** looked like a girl there; it helped that Shiraishi looked so cool… :-X which means that there will likely be some ShiraishiXFuji – maybe even ChitoseXFuji – along the way! XD**

**So far, the pairs seem to be Smiling Pair, Perfect Pair, and Dream Pair… I know everyone likes Perfect Pair, but somehow I don't think I can write it properly. Most likely because I don't really like Tezuka. Rawr… I tortured myself to put just this little bit of Perfect Pair in… T.T I'll try, ne?**

**Review please! I'm inspired by reviews; the more I get the faster I'll update!! (for now, anyways… since I'm having a holiday…)**

**PS. From next week on, please don't expect more than once a week updates. If I manage to get two out, well, that's good, but there may be weeks when I just don't have the time to write… or I may be off updating my MaruiXOC fic 'Love Me Hate Me'. :-X So… I'll do my best to get one chapter up every week, if I'm lucky I can do two, and if I don't have time I'll update the next week. Promise. But for what's left of this week I'll write as much as I can; make use of the holiday. Next chapter is in progress already. XD**


	11. Premonition

Chapter 10: Premonition 

Shitenhouji came, though how they managed to get to Tokyo from Osaka in what had to be less than five hours was beyond me. Kintaro immediately announced their presence with a loud shout of "KOSHIMAE!!!"

"Kintaro-han, be quiet," rumbled Gin. "We are already invading Atobe-han's hospitality. Do not make matters more uncomfortable."

"He's right," added Shiraishi. "Of course, if you do not obey, I will have to remove the bandage on my hand –"

"EYAH!! N-no need for that, buchou! I don't want to die before I can play a proper match with Koshimae!!"

Echizen lowered his cap again, but I could see he was hiding a smile at Kintaro's behavior.

Their second doubles pair, Koharu and Hitouji, had their arms around each other again – obviously they had made up from the spat after their match at the National semifinals. "Ooooi! Momo-jiri!" called Hitouji.

Momo momentarily abandoned the very important duty of stuffing himself to shout, "I am _not_ an ass, you homos!"

Kaidoh coughed loudly in an attempt to hide a laugh, but Momo heard it anyway. "You laughed, didn't you, Mamushi?! You!" He rounded on the homo pair. "Why don't you call him Mamushi-jiri, if you call me Momo-jiri?!"

"Mamushi-jiri just doesn't sound as good as Momo-jri," explained Koharu. "By the way, our offer to you to join us and become a threesome still stands."

"NO WAY AM I GONNA JOIN YOU HOMOS!!" yelled Momo.

"Quiet, Momo!" ordered Tezuka. He nodded a greeting to the newcomers.

Chitose grinned. "Ah, it's the thief-nii-chan. You still haven't congratulated my sister on winning her school's tournament, you know."

"I refused," Tezuka reminded him.

"Please? She still thinks so highly of you…"

I chuckled at the sight of Chitose practically begging Tezuka to congratulate his younger sister – Chitose was significantly taller than Tezuka, so it was really quite a funny scene. Rikkaidai and Hyotei were watching us with various expressions on their face, from amused, to bored, to disgusted; I assumed that that last was because of Koharu and Hitouji's antics.

"Long time no see, Fuji Syuusuke," said someone. Turning, I saw Shiraishi. "Allow me to say that this was not the way I'd thought to meet you again."

"You thought we'd meet on opposite sides of the net, ne?" I asked, smiling at the only boy to beat me in singles in an official match.

He smiled, too. "Actually, yes. No hard feelings about that match?"

I shook my head. "No; in fact, it was a good thing. Without that match, I'd probably have lost to Niou in the finals."

"Is that supposed to comfort me?" complained Niou from the sofa where he was sprawled, Yagyuu sitting near his feet – his partner had taken up all the space.

"Hush, Niou-kun," said the gentleman. Looking at Shiraishi, he commented, "We haven't been introduced, have we?"

"You've never heard about Shitenhouji's Shiraishi from Yanagi?" I asked, genuinely surprised – Inui made it a point to fill us in on _any_ potential opponent we might face, and if Shitenhouji had beaten Seigaku in the semifinals, Rikkaidai would have met them in the finals instead of us.

"'Heard about' is different from 'being introduced to', Yagyuu pointed out.

Shiraishi laughed. "Very well then, I'm Shiraishi Kuranosuke, freshman in Shitenhouji Koukou – yoroshiku. I seem to remember that someone from Rikkai crushed me the year before last in singles one."

"Yagyuu Hiroshi; yoroshiku onegaishimasu. You have a good memory," he replied, shaking hands.

"Oh no; it's just that I'm rarely beaten so badly," said Shiraishi dismissively. "And this is…?"

The trickster opened one lazy eye. "Niou Masaharu. Puri."

"… I see. Yoroshiku."

"Ne, where are our data masters? They don't seem to be around," I said, scanning the room.

"Renji said that he and Inui had information to share. Apparently, the exchange of data between data masters is always done out of the subjects' hearing," explained Yukimura, who'd just walked up. "Hello. You must be Shiraishi. I'm –"

"Yukimura Seiichi, the Godchild," finished the other buchou. "You are famous, even in Osaka – my sister is probably one of your most devoted fangirls."

The pretty blunette laughed. "Is that so? Well, I'm sure you have plenty of your own, Shiraishi."

Feeling a bit left out, I looked past them to see how the rest were getting along.

Kintaro was jumping around Echizen with a vigor that surpassed even Eiji's; Echizen was keeping a tight hold on his poker face through the begging and yelling coming from the other boy. Momo and Kaidoh were still arguing with Koharu and Hitouji, though it seemed that Hyotei's Silver Pair had been dragged into the situation. Eiji was hurriedly getting at the food while Momo and Echizen were distracted; Chitose was still pleading with Tezuka. The Oshitari cousins were talking quietly in the background, though I could see quite clearly that Gakuto was trying to eavesdrop. Jirou had woken up, having realized that Marui was in the same room as he was, had gone _very_ hyper; Marui was just about running for his life. A giggle escaped my throat.

Suddenly, a pair of hands covered my eyes. "Now, don't get distracted, Fuji," came a soft, teasing voice. I was spun around and found myself inches away from Yukimura's face. My eyes snapped open in shock as I tried to back up, only to find that I was trapped by his arms – like me, he was much stronger than he looked.

Somehow, his gentle eyes managed to hold a glint of mischief; the placid smile had a strong hint of sadism. "You were ignoring me," I reminded him, trying in vain to keep my composure. "There wasn't much to pay attention to in the first place, Yukimura-_san_. Besides, I'm sure flirting isn't allowed in the competition to get me into your school."

"Fuji is right. Ore-sama is sure that he informed you of that, Yukimura," came the familiar arrogant voice, not far off.

Yukimura's smile broadened. "Has the competition already started?" he asked, pulling me ever so slightly closer. I felt heat mantle my face at the extreme proximity. Kami-sama… it wasn't fair that he was gorgeous and he knew it too…

Abruptly, hands wrenched us apart and I looked up to see Tezuka's unreadable face. "Tezuka…?"

Was it just me, or was that anger that flickered in his eyes? Before I could get a closer look, though, he turned away from me and faced Yukimura. "Sexual advances are strictly disallowed, Yukimura. It was stated clearly in our discussion on this matter."

The Godchild glanced pointedly at the hand that still clenched around his wrist. Tezuka, however, did not let go until Yukimura said, in a low but dangerous voice, "Let go." When he did, the blunette's normally soft eyes had turned hard; he rubbed the red marks left by Tezuka's hands as he looked up. Their gaze met; tension crackled through the room. Everyone, even Kintaro, went still and turned to see what was the matter.

Instinctively, I took a step back. These two could be really dangerous when they wanted to be. Though neither was the type to launch into a free-for-all brawl, they were certainly giving off a fighting vibe… but what exactly was it that had made them so uptight?

Before anything actually happened, though, Shiraishi stepped in. "Oi oi, there's really no need to get so fired up," he said, trying to placate them.

They glared at each other for another ten seconds before Yukimura laughed – albeit a little forcedly. "You're right, Shiraishi." Turning to me, he said, "I'm sorry for taking advantage of you. Friends?"

I smiled too, relieved that it had dissipated to easily. "Friends." We shook hands; I stole a look at Tezuka to see his reaction to the sudden giving in.

He made a noise in his throat that sounded very like a "Hn", then said, "Do as you want. I have no more control over you, Fuji."

It was probably just my imagination, but I thought I detected a hint of regret in his monotonous voice.

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I was just making my way back from the restroom when a hand darted out from one of the other rooms and tugged me in.

Expecting that it was Yukimura again, I turned around to remind him that he'd already agreed to stop jumping me. To my surprise, it was Inui. I smiled serenely at him, quickly masking my momentary discomfiture. "So _this_ is where you and Yanagi got to for your exchange of data."

Yanagi nodded. "Sadaharu had some very interesting personal data on Tezuka. We agreed that to disclose it anywhere within audible range of him was potentially hazardous; thus we relocated to this room."

"So… how does it involve me?" I asked, sensing that something was up.

"My source of this data was this." Inui held up a nondescript notebook, though obviously different from his customary army-green one. "This…" he flipped it open, riffling through the pages "… is Tezuka's top-secret diary."

"I didn't know Tezuka kept a diary," I remarked, eyeing it curiously. "Is it really so interesting?"

"See for yourself," he invited.

"We decided to alert you to its existence because in the later entries there are several mentions of you," explained Yanagi. "Several, rather _interesting_ mentions. We recommend that you take a close look at it. It might clarify many things previously unexplainable."

"Renji is right," said Inui. "It is extremely informative. We have acquired much insight on Tezuka's concealed personality through this diary of his." Closing the diary, he stroked a finger over its spine almost lovingly before handing it to me.

The moment I touched it, I had a strong premonition that what I would learn was going to affect me, and not a little, but significantly. Yumiko-nee-san always said I had a bit of her gift; whether this premonition came true or not remained to be seen.

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**A/N: Fuji is totally getting OOC… T.T and so is Yukimura… DARGHONE it!**

**Perfect and Smiling Pair are so major here… minor ToFu (someone really needs to come up with a name for them) and hopefully a little ShiraishiXFuji as well. Shitenhouji is really fun to play with too!! Everyone loves them, ne? XD**

**Sorry, there will be no Thrill Pair in this fic. At all. It'd just be **_**weird**_**; I mean, **_**Fuji**_**'s the girl, and she's older than Ryo-baby!! Pairing them up here would be… hmm. I can't think of a word to describe it.**

**Lolz, Tezuka's jealous. XD Let's see what's in his diary!! Since I planned this one, it should be up soon… I hope… (bleep)ing school… -shakes fist-**

**PS. If the story is getting draggy, I'm sorry. I finally seem to be getting an idea on how the plot should be like… and judging from my other fics and the length of this one so far, I think I'll be hitting 30 to 40 chapters with ease if the plot goes right. Stay with me, ne? And if you really like it, advertise to your buddies!! I've allowed anonymous reviews!! (I know I sound pathetic… but authors live on reviews, ne?)**


	12. Trepidation

Chapter 11: Trepidation

I settled down with the innocent-looking diary in an inconspicuous place – a place where, if someone happened to glance over, would be immediately passed over without actually being noticed. If someone discovered I was missing, they would look for me; if I hid in the most deserted corner, someone would be sure to notice me. This kind of place was best.

With some trepidation, I opened the diary. It seemed that Inui had used the wrong word to describe it – it was more like a journal than a diary. Well, Tezuka wasn't really the type to keep a diary in the first place. A journal made more sense for someone like him.

Even so, it wasn't new. The first few entries were dated near spring the year before last year; when I turned to the last page, I found it to be written in spring last year. Tezuka's journal from two years ago? Well, maybe that was how Inui had managed to get away with stealing – no, perhaps _borrowing_, as he'd said he did plan to return it to Tezuka eventually – it and taking his time to analyze it.

Yanagi had said that the later entries were those with the most interesting data – that is, personal data. I flipped through it before deciding to just read the last few pages, so that I'd be done fast and no one would notice my absence.

_16__th__ March_

_I cannot get him out of my mind. He gives me headaches, even when he is not present. Why?_

Just that first sentence had made my eyes snap open. Good Kami-sama, just what on earth went on in Tezuka's mind!

_Fuji Syuusuke… he drives me mad. Surely it is impossible for a male to look so beautiful._

… It wasn't impossible. What about Yukimura? He gave the name of 'bishounen' a new definition.

_Why do I feel so unsure when he is around? Why does my pulse quicken when he turns that teasing smile on me? Why am I unable to feel real anger towards him, no matter what outrageous pranks he plays on all of us, even me?_

_I have suddenly realized that I notice certain things about him that I should not even be thinking of. He is a __male__, no matter how feminine he may look. __I__ am a male. It is wrong for me to have such thoughts, yet I cannot stop._

This was wrong. I felt as though I was invading into the most private part of his mind. Plus, these descriptions were his thoughts about _me_. It made me feel even _more_ uncomfortable than I already did.

_I still remember that match, almost a year ago now, yet I can see it so clearly in my mind's eye; it is ingrained into my memory. It was as if I had finally glimpsed his true self beneath the playful exterior. It was then, I believe, that I first wondered if I was in love with him._

In love… with _me_! The seemingly heartless Tezuka-buchou had been in love – with none other than his own teammate. I could feel an irrepressible urge to laugh bubbling up inside me; hurriedly, I stamped it out.

_I had never before considered that I might be homosexual. It is against the rules of society, against the laws of nature. Also, it was more than likely that he would be averse to it. I would not press him; better to suffer in silence than to endure the painful rejection that would surely come from him._

Would I have rejected him? Really, would I? Perhaps I would have, then, because of my pretence – bishounen, I did not mind being, but gay I would not stand for. Even if one was a crossdresser and that meant neither you nor your partner were really homosexuals. Still, it was rather amusing to read his inner turmoil over the issue. He didn't want to be different, at least not in this way.

_Yet, the flashes of pale skin whenever he sped to retrieve my shots… the soft hair dark with sweat and clinging to the smooth contours of his head…. His eyes had been open, but that time they did not tease – they challenged, they taunted, they seemed to see right through me. Even in the heat of the game – or perhaps, because of it – I wanted to touch him, to taste him, to know him, regardless of rules and propriety._

The handwriting seemed to have become messier, faster, as if it had just poured out of him. At the sight of the raw words, I felt my face heat up a little. After all, it was about _me_. Anyone would blush if they knew they had that kind of effect on someone they'd thought untouchable.

_It hurts, this need, this want. Forbidden. Shunned. I almost wish I had never met him, for if I had never known that Fuji Syuusuke existed, I would not have ever fallen for him._

So he _had_ fallen for me. How unexpected. By now, after reading the entry, it had seemed inevitable. I had already inferred it from his previous words.

_I had fallen for him without knowing it. I had unknowingly let him draw closer to me, slowly let him discover the tiny chinks in my armor. I knew he knew he was different to me, that I treated him in a slightly different way from the rest of the team, albeit so slight only one such as he could have observed it._

I had noticed that he did let me come closer; know him better than the rest. I'd assumed he just thought of me as a friend. Apparently, though, it was more.

_Though the school year is about to end, I know we will be together in Seigaku Koukou. I will still be able to watch, to listen, to love him in obscurity._

How cheesy. How un-Tezuka-ish – but strangely, sweet. I turned to the next page; the last page of the journal.

_20__th__ March_

_She lied to me. To everyone._

_Fuji Syuusuke, a girl._

_I do not know what to think anymore._

So this was the entry of the last day at tennis practice, when Echizen had told everybody about my secret. Maybe this would explain what he had been thinking behind the cold façade…

_For all that I still want her, she deceived us, through and through. Perhaps the very fact that she is a girl is what makes her even scarier. Manipulative. Calculative. Still, female or male, I am exhilarated, for reasons yet unknown._

Interesting description of me. I liked it. Feeling my smile widen slightly, I continued reading.

_My doubts about my own sexual orientation were solved; my fears that society would reject us as a couple dissipated. Heterosexuals were normal. Even if she was once a crossdresser, surely if she decided to return to her true gender, all would be well._

Obviously Tezuka had been quite relieved at the confirmation that he was straight. Going against the rules was not something he greatly enjoyed.

_But her very feminity would be what takes her away from me._

_She would no longer be a teammate by my side, the way I first knew her, the very reason I loved her._

_The pale lips and vivid blue eyes, already rare – I'd never see them again, so closely, so clearly. She would be far removed from me, from the team. Even without counting my own personal desires, the subtraction of her from Seigaku would be a major setback in the high school tennis circuit._

_Perhaps I could speak for her; get her special permission to join the boys' team. I certainly do not want her to begin crossdressing again. Call me selfish, and I would not deny it._

So he had really been willing to allow me back on the team! Well, he should have _said_ so! Then I wouldn't have gone off to Shuubijou in the first place!

_Would she stay? Would she not? I cannot blame her should she choose to leave. But if so, I want to follow._

The sappiness looked strange, especially when written in Tezuka's exact, no-nonsense handwriting. Saa… he could be sweet, it seemed. On the inside, where no one saw it.

_This is the last page of this journal. How fitting, that it should hold these thoughts. Of course, no one will ever read this… I shall begin a new one, with the new school year._

There, the journal ended. I closed it slowly, thinking over what I'd read.

Tezuka Kunimitsu was in love with me. According to the journal, he'd first wondered about it a year ago. And judging from the last entry, the feeling was unchanged.

How should I react? Was _I_ in love with him? I didn't think so. Plus, he'd know I'd read his journal, because how else would I have known?

Wait. Inui and Renji had read it. The blush, which had faded slightly, returned back in full force, and I stared at the book that had said both so little and so much. Knowing those data masters, they'd squeezed it dry of any personal data they could wring from it, read between the lines and come up with extremely mortifying conclusions on my part –

A shadow fell over me, and someone grabbed the book from my loose grip. I looked up; if it were Eiji or Echizen or even Yukimura, they would pay –

It was Tezuka. The very Tezuka whose journal I had been reading. And he did not look happy. Oh no, not at _all_ happy.

"You were reading my journal." It was not a question; his voice was completely toneless.

Well, since I'd been caught red-handed, there was no point in denying it. "Yes, I was."

He was silent for a second, then two. I couldn't tell what he might be thinking behind that stony stare.

Suddenly, he tugged me roughly to my feet, and then, to my utmost shock, he slammed me against the wall and pinned me there with his body. And it was all heat and surprise and shouts and the distant realization that the person who had taken my first ever kiss was my former team captain.

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**A/N: That was really crappy and really rushed… -sob- and plus, it's Perfect Pair; remember I can't really write it. Both of them were so OOC! –cries- I really hope the journal was up to expectations – probably not, though… T.T**

**Only pair in this chapter is Perfect Pair… all Perfect Pair fans, I hope your eyes didn't burn when you were reading this… all non-Perfect Pair fans, please wait till the next few chapters come along; I think I can get the other pairs in on the way… can't say more or else I'll be giving spoilers… :-X**

**Reviews would totally make my day. I need them to live. Really. **

**Depending on whether or not I have inspiration, I might update this weekend too – because it's Good Friday and we have a day off! –cheers- But then again, I might be updating something else – so, like I said, it depends on whether or not I have inspiration. XD**


	13. Rulebreaking

Chapter 12: Rule-breakingChapter 12: Rule-breaking

The scratch of pen against paper was the only sound in the otherwise silent room. I could feel twenty pairs of eyes burning into me, even though most of my mind was occupied with the _reason_ behind the stares and the silence.

I was in no way experienced at kissing, but even as inexperienced as I was, I could tell this wasn't at all good. Kisses weren't supposed to make you feel like your teeth would be bruised when they ended, neither were they supposed to be so… well, messy. But that was exactly what this one felt like.

When Tezuka finally released me and stepped back, I let my eyes slide open as he searched me for a reaction. Hmm… I don't think I'd ever seen him actually looking _anxious_, the way he did now…

"Ii data," said somebody. "See, Renji, it is as I predicted." Apparently, it was Inui speaking.

"Indeed, it is as you said. What was the percentage chance?" inquired Yanagi.

"There was a 97.5 percent chance that letting Fuji read the diary would prompt the beginning of a romantic relationship between them," answered Inui.

"You also predicted that a side effect of instigating this relationship was that Tezuka would not be able to bring himself to punish you for 'borrowing' his diary," said Yanagi shrewdly.

"Well, it is simply a matter of killing two birds with one stone," Inui replied. "Though, the percentage of that happening is 89.8, which is fairly favorable."

Suddenly, the rest of the room seemed to find their tongues. Everyone started talking at once.

"Uwah!! Tezuka likes Fujiko-chan!!" cried Eiji.

"Mada mada dane, buchou," commented Echizen.

"Ore-sama was sure that it was _you_, Tezuka, who insisted that sexual advances be strictly prohibited." Atobe's arrogant voice carried over the chaos clearly.

Yukimura smiled, showing teeth. "To think you were just keeping her for yourself…"

"So tensai Fuji Syuusuke and stony buchou Tezuka Kunimitsu are actually human," observed Yuushi, smirking slightly.

Kenya groaned and hit him. "Just shut up, will you? You're ruining the mood –"

"It was already ruined by Inui and Yanagi," replied Yuushi, ducking the shot.

Niou grinned widely. "Y' know, Hiroshi, that kiss looked kinda hot, somehow. Don't you think so?"

The Gentleman managed to keep a straight face even when confronted by such a very _wrong_ statement. "It was their first kiss, Niou-kun."

"Now you see, there is absolutely nothing wrong with having intimate intra-team relationships," said Koharu, adjusting his glasses importantly.

Shishido and Momo growled at exactly the same time and whacked Koharu – or at least they _tried_ to whack him. Unfortunately, each ended up whacking the other instead of their target.

"_Ow_!! You (bleep)!!" yelled Shishido, nursing an injured head.

"Hey, you hit me too!!" shouted Momo as he clutched his stomach, which had been the victim of the book Shishido had used.

"Shishido-san, are you okay?" Choutarou quickly grabbed some ice for his doubles partner, not even waiting for an answer.

Momo sweatdropped. "Why isn't anyone coming to help _me_?!" he complained.

"Because he hit your stomach, so hopefully it'd shrink a bit, and then you won't eat so much!" cried Gakuto, completely exasperated by the absolute mindlessness of the whole situation.

Oishi suddenly came running over with a tray of things in his hands. "Sorry I took so long! Here's balm for the bruise, bandages if you need it – oh yes, there should be a painkiller somewhere –"

This time, _everyone_ including me sweatdropped at Seigaku's resident mother hen's… well, motherly ways.

Suddenly I realized that Tezuka had been saying something that I hadn't heard under all the chaos. Tilting my head to face him again, I asked, "Sorry, what did you say again?"

He looked rather frustrated – his eyebrows were twitching slightly – probably because he'd said whatever he'd said quite a few times already. "I asked if you'd come home to Seigaku, Fuji. I…" his eyes were such a wonderful deep brown… did you call it golden mahogany? And why hadn't I ever noticed? "I want you back. _We_ want you back. Seigaku isn't the same without its tensai."

I frowned. Just because they wanted me back, it didn't mean _I_ would want to go back myself. True, my teammates were entertaining and fun, but with this opportunity to see other schools, other teams – why not? I was particularly interested in Rikkaidai and Shitenhouji… Hyotei was an alleged school or rich brats, of which I certainly wasn't a part of; plus, I didn't think I'd be able to put up with Atobe for the whole three years of high school.

If I simply chose a school, the others would demand a reason. And as yet, I didn't have one that could stand – most could easily be torn down, especially with people like the data masters and the other tensais Yuushi and Koharu. So…

"Tezuka, sexual advances are against the rules. You said so yourself," I reminded him, pushing away. "If I decided to go back to Seigaku just because of you, none of the others would be happy, now would they?"

Frowning, he asked, "Don't you _want_ to come back?"

Yukimura suddenly intervened, saving me from having to think of a plausible answer. "Now, Tezuka, back off. Rules are rules, aren't they? If you can try to persuade her like that, so can _all_ of us."

Atobe fixed Tezuka with his snooty stare. "Ore-sama believes that Seigaku should be disqualified from the competition."

Smiling crookedly, Shiraishi glanced at me. "Come up with something we can actually compete in. Until now –" he gestured towards the windows, which framed a full moon already well on its journey up the sky " – we haven't done anything but bicker."

A finger traced my cheekbones and ran down my neck, sending shivers down my spine. I looked around to see – who else? – Yukimura, smiling in his completely irresistible manner. "He's right, _Syuusuke_." His voice caressed my name, as if he rolled it around in his mouth and enjoyed the taste completely before actually speaking it. Not my surname or even my full name, but my _first_ name… "Let us have something we can really fight over. I'm sure we can all promise to do our best to win you." The way his eyes glinted was just too suggestive for comfort…

Did he even know how _wrong_ that had been? But then again, they did have a point about actually having something to fight about. Yet the only thing that was universal about them was… tennis. And a tennis match among all of them would be unacceptable in my situation. For one thing, it'd be troublesome, and I wouldn't necessarily want to go to the winner's school – Seigaku _had_ beaten them all before. Still, at that time _I'_d been a part of the team…

Then a light bulb appeared in my mind, and I grinned. That was it!

The smile on Yukimura's face widened slightly. "Thought of something, ne?"

Shiraishi sighed. "Yukimura-san, let her have her personal space back, won't you?" he asked, tugging at the blunette's arm.

"Fine, fine…" Yukimura stepped back, still smiling sadistically. Almost immediately, I found that I could breathe easier without the extreme proximity.

"Don't you ever go so close to Fuji again, Yukimura." It was Tezuka, and he was glaring daggers at the pretty buchou of Rikkai.

"Oh? And why not? You violated the rule of 'no sexual advances allowed' that you created yourself; you have no right to tell others not to do so." Now his smile was almost poisonously sweet; his eyes were challenging the other buchou.

Not again… the testosterone level was rising every second that their staring match continued, and it was distinctly uncomfortable.

Atobe frowned, then shrugged. "Ore-sama shall not get himself involved in this."

Warmth appeared on my shoulder; Shiraishi had apparently rested a hand there. "You know, Fuji, you'd better tell them exactly what to fight over, because they're more than ready to start the war," he remarked, again with that infectious, crooked grin.

Nodding, I went over and grabbed the two buchous by their shoulders. "Yukimura, Tezuka, stop it. I want you to know how I'll decide which school to go to," I said loudly, so that the whole room could hear me.

At once they broke the stare and turned to me. Atobe and Shiraishi, as well as most of the rest of the people in the room, closed in to hear my announcement. "Well?" demanded Shishido. "Hurry up!"

I paused to let the suspense build up a little before declaring, "I'll go… to the school that can beat me. In tennis, of course."

**A/N: I'm SO sorry for such a late update!! I know the last time I uploaded I said I'd upload again before Easter, but my inspiration kind of got stolen by 'Love Me Hate Me' so I just **_**couldn't**_** write this one at all!! Believe me, I **_**tried**_**, really I did!! –dodges rotten fruits thrown by pissed reviewers–**

**In any case, I did say **_**once a week updates and two if you're lucky**_** so I'm still updating this week aren't I?! I didn't do anything wrong!! –cringes under attack of outraged reviewers–**

**Ahem. Oh god, that was **_**such**_** a crummy chapter. Even though I rewrote it twice. It was **_**even**_** crummier before… and now it's still damn short!! T.T maa, it **_**is**_** kind of like a transitional chapter… feedback is loved, as usual, so please REVIEW!!**


	14. Tennis

Chapter 13: TennisChapter 13: Tennis

All four buchous blinked simultaneously. "Beat you… in tennis?"

"That's what I said," I replied cheerfully, and prepared myself for the outburst that was on its way.

I wasn't wrong. The whole room was almost immediately resounding as everyone tried to make himself heard.

"What the –"

"That's so com–"

"But Fujiko-"

"Why didn't you just –"

"We thought you –"

"Just tennis?! That's –"

"Who plays?" This last rang out clearly over the pandemonium.

Glancing at the speaker – Shiraishi – I allowed my smile to widen even further. "Saa… I thought that that should be decided among yourselves, though I personally expect that I would be playing you captains. One person _only_, and he must be in high school now – it just doesn't make sense if I go to the high school when he's in middle school, ne? So Echizen, Kirihara, and Kintaro are out, as are the rest of the present middle-school students."

"Che," mumbled Echizen, obviously displeased.

"Whatever. Buchou or fukubuchou can crush you easily," grunted Kirihara.

Kintaro looked clueless for a moment before grinning widely. "Ah, but Shiraishi beat you before, ne Fuji-san?"

My eyes flickered open as I showed teeth in my smile. "Ah, but this time it'll be different."

"Fujiko-chan, this is _dangerous_!" exclaimed Eiji, worried. "Remember what Ishida-san did to Taka-san last time at the Nationals? You can't do power stuff like Taka-san's Dash Hadoukyuu –"

"He's right, Fuji. You can't stand against somebody like that!" Oishi chimed in.

"Saa… who said it was _normal_ tennis?" I inquired, inwardly cackling with glee at the shock I instigated with that one sentence.

"It's _not_ normal tennis…?!"

Shiraishi massaged his temples. "So, to sum up, what we have to do is play with whatever restriction you give us – like what again?"

"Like, you only play with your backhand, or only do net play," I said. "And I'll play with the opposite handicap. In other words, if I restrict you to net play, I'll play only at the baseline. Makes sense?"

"_No_," came the resounding chorus.

"Well, deal with it," I replied mercilessly. "After all, if it were just _normal_ tennis, it'd be boring, now wouldn't it?"

"It'd be _normal_," grumbled someone.

I grinned and shrugged. "Well, normal _is_ boring, ne? In any case, I'll also have a handicap. At least some of my Counters will be sealed; others limited. It'll be difficult on both sides, so don't complain."

Tezuka spoke up suddenly. "How are the handicaps decided?"

"I choose, naturally," I said, as if it were the most obvious thing in the world – which it _was_. "I'll tell you what it is directly before the match – no preparing allowed. In fact, I won't even let you know when I'll play you until the day itself."

Now Atobe frowned. "This will have to be carried out some other time? That is unacceptable. The decision is supposed to be settled _today_, or at least by the start of the next school week."

"Maa, I can play two of you this weekend and then another two next weekend," I pondered. "In the meantime, I'll just go back to Shuubijou –"

Four very flat and final "_No_"s cut me off before I could go further.

"You are _not_ going back to that… _place_," spat Atobe. Tezuka looked furious at the very suggestion, or as furious as was possible for him to look. Yukimura and Shiraishi also had rather forbidding expressions on their faces.

Although I _had_ expected this kind of reaction, I feigned surprise. "I can't just play _truant_."

"Pretend sick leave or something," ordered the silver-haired diva. "On no condition shall Ore-sama –"

"_We_," interrupted Tezuka, with a harsh glare in the direction of the Hyotei buchou.

" – _we_ allow you to return there. It is detrimental to your mental health, as we have already observed –"

"Mou, that hurt," I protested.

" – and thus we have deemed it unfit –"

"Oh, just say that you're being possessive and don't want her to go to a girls' school, why don't you?" complained Gakuto. "I _still_ don't see what's the point of all this fuss –"

"Quiet, Gakuto," Yuushi hushed the temperamental redhead.

Once again, Shiraishi stepped in. "The gist of it is, none of us think you should go back to that school. A week's 'sick leave' should be enough, and plus if you do so, you can always challenge any of us during that time. Which means that this gets resolved faster."

"I can fix the 'sick leave' fairly easily," I said thoughtfully. All I needed to do was get a hold of Hideki and persuade her to tell the teacher I was confined to the bed with terrible bronchitis or something of the sort –

Yukimura's soft voice broke through my plotting. "This sound interesting… I look forward to playing against you, Fuji-_kun_."

"As do I," added Shiraishi, with that crooked smile that seemed to be his trademark.

Tezuka nodded, and Atobe inclined his head in acknowledgement.

I blinked in pretended amazement. "Oh, so I am indeed playing the buchous?" Inside, though, I grinned. It was exactly as I had predicted… not only that, this way I wasn't going to have to think up some other way to avoid getting pulverized by someone like Ishida.

"Of course," declared Atobe. "It is the duty of the buchou –"

"Whatever. Nobody's listening to you anyway, Atobe," Yuushi informed his buchou. Looking my way, he added. "Though, you'd beat me easily – which probably means the rest of our team, too."

"Speak for yourself!" exclaimed Shishido. "Have you no pride in –"

Choutarou, predictably, tried to calm his doubles partner down. "Shishido-san, please!"

Yuushi glanced at Shishido over the rim of his spectacles. "I'd like to see _you_ beat Fuji Syuusuke, Shishido."

That shut the dash specialist up, at least for the moment. There was a short silence as we all wondered what to do next.

It was interrupted by a huge yawn from Kintaro, and, like a disease, it spread through the whole room – everyone was yawning like they hadn't slept in ages. Sweatdropping, I said, "Saa, maybe we should call it a day."

I arrived home slightly less than an hour later – Atobe had insisted that he send a limousine to fetch me home. Since I'd called home to inform my parents I'd be home late, it hadn't been much of a problem – well, my parents were generally quite open minded and let us children have something almost like free rein. They _had_ allowed me to crossdress for years, after all; that definitely said _something_ about them.

I wasn't too sure what exactly happened to the rest, though. It seemed that Atobe was putting up with Shitenhouji and Rikkaidai in his mansion – after all, it _did_ have much too much space to spare. I'd probably play one of them first, just to be considerate. I really wasn't as sadistic as some people thought I was.

Then again, I hadn't been able to resist teasing Echizen – "Saa, who knew that you and Kintaro-kun got along so well, Echizen?" – just before Seigaku had left Atobe's mansion. Our 'Ochibi' had actually allowed the hyper redhead _hug_ him when the time came to leave. Who'd pass up such a chance?

Still, though, Yukimura and Tezuka had been at odds with each other. One could almost have felt the cold aura emanating from them as they shook hands in farewell. Sanada had ignored it, since that was what he did best. Oishi had acquired the familiar look of anxiety in his eyes but pretended not to notice – after all, nobody with sense would want to be caught in the middle of two fearsome buchous when their blood was up.

Not just that, but Tezuka had also been quite… _possessive_ of me – he'd grabbed me then kissed me, _hard_, immediately after breaking the chill handshake with Yukimura – almost as if to say "She's mine and you're not going to get a chance at her" or something to that effect. I personally thought that had been quite unnecessary, being as I was quite sure that Yukimura was more inclined towards guys and he was just flirting with me for sadistic pleasure. At least, that was what it seemed like. I didn't really get the same 'I want you; you're mine' kind of vibe from him, the way I did from Tezuka.

Turning over on my bed, I sighed. I would have to decide who to play against tomorrow, or at least this weekend. And I'd have to locate Hideki Misaki and tell her that I needed to take a week off from school…

Before I could finish planning, the events of the day finally caught up to me, and sleep pulled me under. I could always plan when I woke up.

**A/N: Argh, another crappy filler chapter. I hope this cleared up the stuff about the tennis competition and all that whatnot… T.T**

**Sorry if I didn't take your suggestions for the competition, nya… I kind of had a mindblock and wasn't exactly thinking straight when I wrote this – which accounts for the overall crappiness. Sometimes I really can't believe I write such things. –sighz– If it's really terrible, I can always just delete/rewrite this chapter and the previous chapter to change the competition into something else or whatever… damn, my brain really isn't working… - sobz–**

**I hope I'm making sense… and that most of them are IC (in-character…?) because people are complaining about the OOCness… OOCness is my greatest enemy by far!! –cries–**

**PS. As you may have noticed by now, there is some RyoTaro, Platinum and Silver pair… these will be shounenai side pairings, though the main shall definitely be het since Fuji's a girl. Just a warning, in case anyone feels squirmy. Check my profile for my information! (well, when and if I update it, there'll be more information…)**

**PPS. If my linebreaks aren't showing up, please tell me so that I can change them to something that **_**can**_** be seen. Thanks, nya – and please REVIEW!!**

**(side note – my crossover fic Music of the Night may be up for adoption due to complete lack of inspiration and extreme homework overload. Please read it; PM me or tell me through a review if you'd like to continue it for me. thanks!)**


	15. Osaka

Chapter 14: OsakaChapter 14: Osaka

The next day, over breakfast, Yumiko-nee-san kept shooting amused glances in my direction. I waited for my parents to leave the table – my mother to the kitchen, my father to the living room – before demanding her reasons (Yuuta had left the house before I'd woken up, for tennis training if I remembered correctly).

"Well, I was just thinking that you must've had some _fun_ yesterday at your friend's house," she said. The glint in her eyes did not inspire much confidence.

I gave her a suspicious look. "And what is _that_ supposed to mean?"

"Put it this way – some time after you called to tell us about your situation, I decided to check in on you. Apparently, I caught you at a bad moment," was the placid reply. "You seemed to be getting rather… intimate with that blunette bishounen I spotted during the finals of the Nationals last year. Then Tezuka-kun appeared and shoved him off."

Not for the first time, I thanked Kami-sama for the fact that I didn't blush easily. "Yes, you did catch me at a rather inopportune time," I commented.

She smiled. "Oh, that's not all. I checked in a little while later, and what do I see? My little Syuusuke getting orally raped by her former tennis club buchou."

This time I choked on the mouthful of juice I'd just taken and spat it out. _Very_ unladylike, but I really couldn't care less. Since when did Yumiko-nee-san state events in so crude a manner?

"Why, Syuusuke? Shocked by my language?" teased Yumiko-nee-san. "Anyways, while you were off playing around last night, Father informed us that we're off to Osaka."

My eyes snapped open and I barely managed to stop myself from spitting out my second attempt at a mouthful of juice. Swallowing hard, I gasped, "_What_?!"

"You _know_ he's forgetful," she reminded me. "Apparently he's promoted and has to join the headquarters – in Osaka. We're leaving within the week."

--

"Atobe, it's not like I had any say in the matter!" I protested. "For the record, I was only informed about it _one hour ago_!"

In a lesser man, his tone would have been described as pissed. Then again, the diva probably never woke up before noon on a weekend. He sighed. "Fuji… do you mean to say that after that whole fiasco yesterday, you're just hopping off to join Shitenhouji for no better a reason than that your dad's transferring your entire family there?"

I smiled rather sheepishly, even though I knew he couldn't see me over the phone. "I suppose so."

Another sigh. "Ore-sama is quite displeased, Fuji Syuusuke. And Ore-sama can bet you that Yukimura and Tezuka are going to be equally – if not even more – displeased than he is about this. No doubt Shiraishi will be overjoyed that he doesn't need to get beaten by you – you're sure to beat him this time, what with your new counters and all – so that you can join his team."

"Maa… do you mind informing Yukimura and Shiraishi, since they're staying in your mansion? Besides, I don't have their contact numbers," I said. "I do have Tezuka's, him being my former buchou."

I could almost see Atobe drawing himself up to his full height. "Since when was Ore-sama your messenger boy?" he demanded.

"Since I said so," I replied cheekily. "I'm sure you wouldn't mind having an excuse for catching your guests with their pants down, now would you?"

"_What_?!" he exclaimed. "Are you implying something?!"

Grinning, I answered, "Saa… it's all in the mind, A-to-be-_kun_. Will you tell them or not?"

"… Ore-sama shall condescend to pass on your message. However, your presence may be required – they're going to have plenty to say. No, _Ore-sama_ has plenty to say too," Atobe corrected himself. "And make it snappy, boy – girl. Ore-sama does not wish to have to entertain the response of his guests to this particular piece of news."

--

The diva had arrived in his stretch limousine barely fifteen minutes later to pick me up. Yumiko-nee-san smiled knowingly at the sight of the 12-meter-long (or longer) vehicle pulled up outside the house with a white-gloved, liveried chauffeur sliding out to open the door – revealing Atobe-obbocchama in a particularly posh, designer-tailored outfit and branded sunglasses that somehow spoiled the effect.

"Syuusuke, your friend is here!" she called – rather unnecessarily, since I was not three feet behind her and perfectly capable of seeing who it was.

Atobe glared at her, still in a bad mood. "Get Fuji out here _at once_."

"I'm here, Atobe," I informed him, stepping outside. "Nee-san, tell Yuuta that he can have my share of lunch – and probably dinner, too. I'll call to let you know."

"Sure, Syuusuke. Have some fun with your friends today," was her very suggestive reply. I ignored the uncomfortable connotations and followed the silver-haired boy to his limo.

Having settled on the top-quality leather seats, he gave me a sharp look. "Have you informed Tezuka?"

I paused as the limousine started, smoothly and silently – as expected of Atobe. "No… I told him to come to your mansion. You haven't said anything either, have you?"

The diva sniffed. "Ore-sama _intended_ to do so. However, neither of the other buchous were awake at that unholy hour that _you_ woke Ore-sama, and their roommates did not believe in the purity of Ore-sama's intentions in barging in on them at such a time."

Suppressing a laugh, I said, "In other words, Sanada and Chitose kicked you out."

"You could say that," he conceded.

--

When we arrived back in the mansion, Shitenhouji and Rikkaidai – as well as Hyotei – were lazing around the same solar that we'd occupied the day before. I noted that Niou and Yagyuu were squeezed into an armchair, sitting closer than was absolutely necessary; Gakuto was being particularly clingy, especially to Yuushi – who looked like he was trying to have a conversation with his cousin Kenya and failing due to his doubles partner's antics.

Meantime, Shitenhouji was just being Shitenhouji – Kintaro was being a nuisance, Ishida was being a rock, Koharu and Yuuji were staging a public display of affection and encouraging others to do the same, Zaizen was watching everything and Shiraishi was trying to keep his team under control. He was the first to spot us and paused in his chasing of Kintaro. "Atobe – Fuji?!"

"Hello, Shiraishi," I greeted.

"Fuji!" Yukimura came over, smiling as usual. "You decided to play one of us today? That was quick."

"Actually…" I stalled. Where was Tezuka and the rest of Seigaku?

"Yes?" prompted the pretty blunette.

Suddenly, Atobe intervened. "Yukimura, explain the behavior of your fukubuchou. He _booted_ Ore-sama out of the room Ore-sama had so kindly lent to you while you were asleep."

"Ah, did he? That _does_ sound like something Genichirou would do," mused the Rikkai buchou. "Did he give you time to explain yourself?"

"No!" fumed the silver-haired diva. "He took advantage of Ore-sama's hospitality in a huge way!"

"Now, Atobe, that's just his way," soothed the other boy. "I apologize on his behalf. So, Fuji – " he turned to me " – who're you going to play today?"

I thought fast. "I'll announce it when Seigaku gets here."

He pretended to pout. "Fine."

As if on cue, the door swung open to reveal Tezuka and the rest of the team. I was immediately glomped by Eiji. "Fujiko-chan!"

"Kikumaru," said Tezuka warningly.

"Ah… mengo-mengo!" apologized the redhead, quickly letting go of me.

"It's okay, Eiji," I reassured him. Tezuka could be so possessive; it _was _sweet, but also a little irritating.

"Nya, it's not! I don't want Tezuka on my case for hugging his girlfriend!" he replied, shaking his head violently. Then he grinned widely. "Ne, ne, when are you two going to start dating?" he asked in a stage whisper that everybody heard.

I smiled rather sadly. "Not anytime soon, I'm afraid."

Tezuka blinked, then frowned. "Fuji?"

"You see…" I opened my eyes, looking at each of the buchous in the face to show that I wasn't lying. "I'm moving to Osaka."

One.

Two.

Three.

"_WHAT_?!"

--

**A/N: Argh. I'm really sorry for the rather long wait and the short, pointless, filler-ish chapter. And for ending in a cliffie of sorts. PLEASE REVIEW!!**

**I actually didn't really want t write four tennis matches, which accounts for the sudden plot twist (again). If you don't approve of this, tell me – depending on what kind of feedback I get for this chappie, I'll see whether I continue with the plot twist or whether I delete it and rewrite **_**without**_** the plot twist. :-X**

**Once again, IT IS THE ATTACK OF THE OOCNESS. T.T Yumiko and Syuusuke in particular. I do like the way Atobe got kicked out of Yukimura and Shiraishi's rooms, though XD**

**PS. Eiji's 'mengo-mengo' is actually his cutesy way of saying 'gomen-gomen'. Yeah. Really. O.o**

**PPS. Those who haven't seen it yet, do check out my OT6 oneshot 'Parental Issues'!! It's from their adopted kid's POV; hinted but not explicit yaoi – my first shot at a shounenai main pairing!! **


	16. Laughter

Chapter 15: ReactionChapter 15: Laughter

"But –"

"Fuji –"

"You can't –"

"I'm _sorry_; I didn't even know until this _morning_!" I protested.

There was a determined look in Yukimura's eyes. "Well, there's still the option of boarding."

Shiraishi laughed. "Is it really that bad of an idea for her come to Shitenhouji?"

"Shitenhouji rocks!!" yelled Kintaro. Everybody ignored him.

"Look," I interrupted, "I agree that I _can_ go to the boarding schools like Rikkai and Hyotei, but Seigaku…"

Tezuka was frowning, but he nodded. "It will be too troublesome for you."

"Exactly." Ignoring the guilt that was creeping up on me, I continued, "Attending Shitenhouji would be the most convenient, but that should not affect the rest of you. So if you'd like to advertise for your school's boarding facilities, please do. I'd like it as soon as possible; today is preferable."

"Fuji." It was Tezuka. "I'd like a word with you. In private."

Well, it wasn't unexpected. "Sure. Eto…" Where, though?

Wordlessly, he tugged me through a side door into a much smaller room. I had the sudden amusing notion that Atobe's walk-in wardrobe would probably be about this size. Bigger.

"So… What did you want?" I inquired once he'd closed the door firmly on the excited faces of the others.

He was silent for a few seconds, and I waited patiently for him to grow into his answer. "Fuji."

"Yes?" Still waiting.

"You're trying to get away from me." It wasn't a question, but that didn't mean I couldn't refute it.

Facing him and opening my eyes, I asked, "Why would you think that of me?"

For the first time in a long time, I saw a Tezuka who was unable to meet a gaze squarely. He seemed to be focused on something behind me. "You sounded so unlike yourself; it seemed to have been an excuse you made up. It's also too coincidental," he replied slowly. "Plus, Yukimura wants you and you don't mind. I'm not blind, Fuji."

"It was _not_ an excuse," I retorted. "I never said we'd have to break it off if I moved away; you made that up yourself –"

"Tell me that what I said was not true, Fuji," he cut across me.

"I –" About to make an angry comeback, I pulled up short and thought about my answer before saying anything. "_No_, it's _not_ true. Yukimura was just flirting for fun. And if you really don't think I'm going to move to Osaka, I can call my family and they'll confirm it."

Tezuka just stared stonily at me, and I began to get exasperated. "Why don't you believe me?! Is it so difficult –" Suddenly, he stepped forward, pinning me against the wall the way he'd done yesterday. "What the –"

The pressure of his lips on mine made me shut up almost unwillingly; I automatically relaxed into his grip. After a long moment, he released me. "I believe you, Fuji. Even though that is dangerous more often than not."

--

An arm slid over my shoulders, and I turned to see Yukimura. "You shall have your information on our schools once you decide to check your email," he purred softly.

It seemed that I was getting used to Yukimura's little flirtations, but Tezuka definitely wasn't. Ignoring the death glare he was sending across the room, I said, "I'll be able to tell you my decision soon. But until then, I have to attend Shuubijou –"

"No you don't," interrupted the pretty blunette. He didn't seem to be about to remove himself from me for a while. "If you can't come up with a suitable excuse to get your out of school for a week, you're not the tensai I take you for, Fuji Syuusuke."

"A challenge?" I asked, my eyes sliding open.

"If you prefer it that way," was the playful reply. Twiddling his fingers in a small wave, he headed for his teammates.

Barely had I settled onto a nearby sofa when Chitose flopped into the seat next to me, wearing the friendly grin that seemed to be his trademark. "Don't you feel loved, Fuji?" he drawled.

"'Loved'? In what way?" I inquired, though I knew perfectly well what he meant.

"Now don't play innocent," he replied. "Tezuka wants you. Yukimura wants you. I'm pretty sure Shiraishi wants you too, if you look at it that way."

I pretended to think about it. "What about Atobe?"

He snorted. "Atobe? That narcissist loves himself and himself alone. You'll have to be content without him."

"Point," I conceded. "But I don't think Shiraishi wants me in _that_ way."

An eyebrow rose teasingly. "Or so you think."

"And so I _do_ think," I informed him. "If it were otherwise, things would get rather troublesome. Besides, Yukimura was just flirting for the fun of it."

"If you say so, dear Fujiko-chan," he grinned.

Now it was my turn to raise an eyebrow. "Have you been hanging out with Eiji?"

He laughed, and I found that it was strangely nice to listen to – so easy and carefree, not forced at all. Maybe if I _did_ go to Shitenhouji in the end, I'd see how many times I could make him laugh like that. "Maybe I have, maybe I haven't," he drawled teasingly. "But here comes Shiraishi to make sure I haven't been corrupting you. Have a nice time and don't maim him too bad, ne?"

"I have no idea what you are talking about," I retorted, holding back a laugh of my own.

Shiraishi leaned on the back of the sofa. "I hope you didn't say anything unnecessary, Chitose."

His friend looked hurt. "Why, do you really think that of me? I'm hurt, Shiraishi, really –"

"Ignore him," interrupted the Shitenhouji buchou, speaking to me. "I can't believe I know him, sometimes."

Chitose did an overdramatic mime of stabbing himself in the heart. "That hurt, Shiraishi…"

I patted him on the back. "You'll be fine, Chitose – you'll have to be."

"What's that supposed to mean?!"

--

"Mother, why weren't we told about this whole 'moving to Osaka' thing earlier?" I wanted to know. "The company _must_ have told Father at least a month beforehand –"

'Syuusuke, you _know_ how forgetful your father can be when it comes to mundane things like informing his family of his whereabouts," sighed my mother as she ladled out miso soup for us. "It just, well, slipped his mind…"

"Like so many other things," added Yuuta grumpily. He wasn't as affected as I was about the move, as he was already boarding at St Rudolph, but he was still quite pissed about the late notification.

Yumiko-nee-san was still criminally cheerful. Apparently, she had been the first to get wind of it, and had already done all the appropriate preparations for the move. "I think this move would do us good," she commented. "According to the readings I've had from all of you, we should all be quite pleased with the results."

"Yeah, in how many years' time?" demanded Yuuta. He did have a point – Yumiko-nee-san's predictions were never wrong, but often took a while to happen.

Of course, she did acknowledge that fact. "Soon. But Syuusuke, I believe a lot depends on your choice of school."

"Helpful, Nee-san…" I muttered. "I gathered that much."

"Don't be like that, Syuusuke," admonished our mother. "Yumiko is just trying to help. But what schools are you thinking of? Maybe we can help."

My eyes flew open. Why had I never thought of that?! "Rikkaidai, Hyotei and Shitenhouji. They sent me the information on them, as well as their boarding schools."

Yumiko-nee-san sent me a knowing look as my mother nodded. "I see. Well, show them to me after dinner, ne? Itadakimasu!"

"Itadakimasu!" we all chorused before digging in. I smiled. Maybe it wasn't so hard to decide after all – or maybe not. I'd have to wait and see.

--

**A/N: Agh, I'm so sorry for the super-short chappie and long wait… not my fault that the midyears are here, right? –puppy eyes–**

**OOCness!! T.T The pain!! But it's supposed to be in keeping with what they were like before – digging my own grave, aren't I… -sighz-**

**Not much A/N this time. Exhausted. -.-**

**REVIEW PLEASE!!**


	17. Smile

Chapter 16: SmileChapter 16: Smile

"Shitenhouji." My mother folded her arms firmly. "It's the most convenient."

"Rikkaidai." Yuuta looked defiant. "It's got better tennis players."

Yumiko-nee-san just smiled mysteriously. "They're both equally good."

"What's going on? Why's everyone here?" My father, curious, came into my room. "Did something bad happen to Syuusuke –"

"I'm fine," I assured him. "It's just the matter of the school I should go to…"

He looked at the computer screen, quickly scanning the information. "Are you entering as a girl or a boy?"

"A boy," I replied. "They want me to play on their teams, and I agreed."

"Doesn't Tezuka mind?" he asked, shrewdly if absently. "You _were_ Seigaku's tensai; leaving them to go to another school would definitely be a hard blow."

I nodded slowly. "Yes, but Tezuka said he was alright with it." As long as he can have me in other ways, I added silently. Who knew Tezuka could be quite so possessive?

"I see…" Turning, he faced me. "You do realize that in applying for a new school, they will want your data – which, of course, includes your gender? Seigaku middle school took you without question because you applied to it through tennis skills, playing as a boy – and thus they assumed you _were_ a boy. They probably never thought that a girl would want to play against males, as they are supposedly stronger."

Yuuta snorted. "_Supposedly_…"

"I did know that," I said. "But…?"

My father chuckled. "Of course, there's the _but_. You are now applying to these schools after the school term has started. As strong tennis schools, they would be very meticulous as to the details of their members – in other words, you wouldn't be able to fool them just by playing dazzling tennis. The late application also would raise questions, simply because it's late." He paused. "So, you have to make sure that the people on the team you are entering either have extremely good connections and can make sure that nobody in the need-to-know loop leaks information, or can just blackmail the authorities into submission."

I thought about it. He did have a point. Who was capable of that…?

Atobe had the entire Hyotei school board twisted around his little finger. That was for sure. But Hyotei wasn't really my first choice of a school – I rather preferred the idea of attending Rikkaidai or Shitenhouji.

As for Yukimura and Shiraishi, I wasn't too certain. They would probably wield a formidable amount of influence among the students, but not necessarily the authorities. Yet… if one were to consider blackmail, Yukimura seemed more likely to get blackmail that works.

Yukimura, so that meant… Rikkaidai.

--

In the end, it seemed that _I_ was the last one who knew I'd be going to Rikkaidai. Atobe and Shiraishi had both sounded disappointed, but as though they'd expected my decision. And Yukimura had been almost _smug_.

"Ah, Fuji! You've decided to come to Rikkai?"

"… Yes, but I could have been calling to tell you I was going to attend Shitenhouji."

"Oh no, I was sure you'd eventually come to us – and you did. We'll be waiting for you… _Syuusuke_. See you tomorrow!" The call ended before I could make a comeback to that particular statement.

The next day being a Sunday, we didn't waste time dawdling – I enlisted Yumiko-nee-san's help in packing my things, while my parents (who had called up the school the night before) brought me there for registration. The first person I recognized upon arrival was Kirihara.

He was leaning against the school's main entrance, obviously bored and waiting for somebody – that somebody being me, I assumed, because the moment he spotted me, his eyes widened and he quickly vanished into the school. Hardly had we found the school office (which wasn't hard to find) when he reappeared with Yukimura in tow.

"They're from the team?" asked my mother out of the side of her mouth.

I nodded. "Ohayo, Yukimura-san, Kirihara-kun." Kirihara made a face at me, disappearing again.

Yukimura sent me a knowing smile before bowing to my parents. "Ohayo gozaimasu, Fuji-san. I am Yukimura Seiichi, from the Rikkai tennis team. You are going to register Fuji-kun now?"

"Yes, we are," answered my father. "I believe we may require assistance from you, though."

"I had thought that you might," said the pretty blunette. "I would be all too glad to help you."

--

"So… where are we going now?" I inquired, following Yukimura as he led me back into the school after he and my parents had finished the registrations and they had left.

He smiled. "To your new room. You get a single in the boys' dormitories… for obvious reasons."

I returned the smile. "Obvious reasons, indeed." A 'boy' staying in the girls' dorms would not only raise a _lot_ of questions, it'd also be suicide on my part. I knew how crazy fangirls could be. And I got a single room – because no parent in their right mind would think their daughter rooming with a boy who was not closely blood-related to her – for whatever reason – was a very good idea.

"Do all of you stay in the dorms?" I asked as we climbed the stairs.

"No; Sanada for one stays at home – his family's very traditional," explained Yukimura. "Jackal and Yagyuu also don't stay here. But Akaya, Renji, Niou and Marui and I do – Akaya, Renji and Niou have been here since middle school; Marui and I just moved here when high school started."

I glanced at him. "Why did you want to stay in the dorms? If you didn't during middle school, transport shouldn't have been an issue, right?"

Surprisingly, he laughed. "I actually wanted to stay in the dorms since middle school – and that was only because dorms weren't available for the grade school students at that time, though they are now. You see, most of my family loves to garden, and we're also pretty possessive over our stuff. It's the kind of 'that's mine and mine _alone_' sort of thing."

"So the garden couldn't be divided in a way that satisfied everyone?" Yukimura, possessive? I'd never really thought that of him…

"It does boil down to that," he agreed. "And, as you may have noticed, Rikkai has very, very large grounds that we don't really have any need for. What is more, not many students here like to do gardening, so I can have an area almost the size of the whole garden at home."

We turned into a corridor. "Do you have siblings?"

He nodded. "Yes; an older brother. His name's Yuichi; he graduated a year ago – almost five years older than me."

I thought of Yuuta. "Are you ever compared to each other?"

"Generally, no," was the answer. "We're sort of… too similar to be compared. Apart from age, that is. Grades, status, type of friends… it's really almost exactly the same; so similar that it's scary. My parents sometimes accidentally call me Yuichi and him Seiichi even though we aren't anywhere near twins."

My eyes slid open. "That _is_ pretty scary. Yuuta and I are always compared against each other…" My voice was almost wistful. "He hated me for years because of that."

He cast me a sympathetic glance. "It must have been terrible."

"It was. We used to be wonderful friends before that," I told him. "But when he entered Seigaku… comparing was unavoidable. They called him 'Fuji Syuusuke's little brother', instead of Fuji Yuuta. By being the school's tensai, I unintentionally trapped him in my shadow…" Realizing I was rambling, I stopped. "Sorry; you probably couldn't care less. It's the past, after all."

"No; it's really quite interesting," Yukimura reassured me. "_You_ are interesting in yourself, Fuji Syuusuke. So far, you're one of the only people I've known who has gone through something like that, and can still smile so."

I had to let out a laugh at that. "And this coming from you, Yukimura Seiichi, who smiles almost as constantly as I do."

"But that's it. I know how hard it is to smile through the pain." His eyes were earnest. "Whenever my teammates came to visit me in hospital, I knew I had to smile, for them if for nothing else. I knew that they held on to my smile as a proof that I was still the Yukimura-buchou that they fought for on the court. They thought that as long as I could still smile, things were okay."

"I smiled for everyone but myself," I informed him. "My teammates, my classmates, my teachers, my family. I smiled to hide the pain Yuuta's hate caused me. I smiled because tensais weren't supposed to be affected by human emotions. I gave those around me a cheerful façade, though I was broken inside."

We came to a stop outside a door right at the end of the corridor, and he turned to face me. "Well."

I stared back at him. "Well."

About to say something, he stopped himself and instead took hold of my arm, pulling me over. I let myself relax into his warm hold, though I never broke our gaze.

"This isn't Seigaku," he whispered softly. "This is Rikkai, and we'll give you real reasons to smile. I promise."

--

**A/N: Rambling… I didn't realize it till Fuji did, actually, but… yeah. I know it's kind of odd that the chappie ended with them just outside the room, but it seemed the best time to end the conversation. It'd just be so anticlimactic if I added that they went into the room, and then I'd have to describe the room, and do all the stuff that should come up in the NEXT chappie.**

**OOCness… I think… they went pretty emo because I reread the first few chapters of this fic, and there was some emoness there, so it got carried down to here. O.o**

**And it's SO cheesy too. Ignore that. This chapter was… crap. I think. T.T**

**Review please!**


	18. Connection

Chapter 17: ConnectionChapter 17: Connection

Somebody was shaking me. "Fuji. _Fuji_. Wake up."

"The canteen will close if you're not up and dressed within the next two minutes," added someone else, almost conversationally.

"Mmmf…" I mumbled. "'m tired; the bed's nice, so lemme sleep."

"I think she's the first one who's said the dorm beds were nice," commented the second person.

"_Fuji_," repeated the first. "Akaya, get a sponge soaked with cold water. I think she needs it."

"Okay, buchou." Footsteps receded, and the sound of a running tap signified where he'd gone. The taps here were much noisier than those at home.

… Wait, if I wasn't at home, then…

I sat up suddenly in the bed, accidentally hitting whoever it was who was bending over me at that time. "I'm sorry! What time is it? Did I oversleep?!" Glancing beside me, I noticed Yukimura standing there, massaging a cheekbone. "Sorry, Yukimura; I –"

He smiled at me. "It's fine. But now Akaya won't be able to have his fun. He loves waking people up with cold water…"

As if on cue, Kirihara reappeared. "Buchou, I – Oh. She's already awake." The speed at which the unreasonably large grin on his face vanished was almost comical.

--

Marui grinned, watching me wolf down my breakfast in what little time remained before the canteen closed. "I hear from Mura-buchou that you deprived our brat of his pleasure this morning?"

"Akaya wanted to drown me in cold water," I replied tartly. "I'm _happy_ to have deprived him of the opportunity."

He popped his bubblegum. "He's done that to me before. Fortunately I woke up in time to dodge."

Had I not been so preoccupied with my food, I'd probably have joined him in laughing. Instead, I tossed down a glass of juice and got to my feet. "Let's go. Class starts soon, right?"

Shrugging, Marui nodded and followed me. "Yeah. Mura-buchou and the rest are probably showing off to our sempais. "He winked. "It's really fun, you know. They get this really pissed face and make mistakes – which only serves to make us look even better."

"I see." Hurriedly, I grabbed a set of uniform and rushed to my bathroom. "By the way, might I know why you have been assigned to follow me around?"

"You don't want me to follow you around? I'm hurt, Fuji, wounded," came the mock-hurt voice from the main room. "In any case, it's actually because Mura-buchou said to."

Trying to knot the tie – and failing miserably – I commented, "He must be _so_ concerned for me."

"I'm supposed to bring you to class and if you're late or don't look presentable, he's going to trash me later," was the breezy reply. "Do you need help with the tie?"

I gritted my teeth. "No."

"If you say so." I could _hear_ the grin in his voice. "Did you know that you, Mura-buchou and Yanagi are in the same class? The best one, too – class 1-A. As befits the former tensai of Seigaku."

"Well, _you're_ supposed to be the tensai of Rikkaidai," I countered. "Why aren't you in 1-A then?"

He sounded rather miffed as he answered, "Nobody here can appreciate my genius… it is a sad, sad fact..."

There was a short pause, in which I struggled with the tie and Marui pondered upon the sad facts of life. He spoke first. "You know, I really don't mind helping you with the tie…"

I threw up my hands in defeat. "Fine." Checking that I looked otherwise decent, I exited the bathroom.

Seeing the state of that particular accessory, the redhead grinned. "It would seem that you aren't on very good terms with ties. Give it here," he said, holding up a hand.

"Refrain from commenting," I ordered, tossing it over.

"A bit late, since I already commented," he pointed out, catching it easily. "Wow. This is one hell of a –"

"_Refrain from commenting_," I repeated, sending him a killer glare.

Laughing, Marui held up his hands in surrender. "Yes ma'am."

--

Yukimura nodded his approval when he saw me waiting outside the classroom with Marui. "Thank you, Marui. I'll take care of her – him now."

The redhead nodded. "See you later, then." He slipped into the class next door with a quick twiddle of his fingers in my direction, which I took to be a wave.

Sanada looked vaguely pained. "Yukimura."

"Yes, Sanada?" The pretty blunette smiled at his friend, who went speechless for a second.

"I believe he was trying to say something to the effect of 'do not forget that Fuji's supposed to be a boy'," remarked Yanagi.

Yukimura shook his head sadly. "It's a pity when Sanada thinks we won't be able to get along without him, ne Renji?"

The data master's lips twitched in a small smile. "Indeed it is. Shall we enter the classroom? We – or rather, you and Fuji – appear to be attracting a significant increase of 2 percent more attention every second we stay here in the corridor."

"Ah, is that so?" Yukimura turned to me. "Saa… after you, Fuji_-kun_."

"You don't have to emphasize the _kun_,' I informed him. "Just Fuji is fine. And it'd be better if I went in after _you_ –"

"But since Sanada here wants me to remember to address you as a boy –" began Yukimura.

"Hn." Sanada pushed open the door, walking past both Yukimura and I. Yanagi followed, his smile slightly more obvious than before.

I folded my arms with a sigh. "So, shall we go in or not?"

"Of course." Yukimura gently gripped my shoulder. "Together." Surprised, I looked up and was met by laughing eyes. "Then we won't have the whole 'after you' problem."

Yanagi, who was standing just inside the door, looked at us with amusement. "It wasn't a problem to begin with."

--

"Ohayo, everybody! Now, before I take the attendance for today, I'd like to introduce a new student who has just transferred to Rikkaidai," the homeroom teacher began. "Fuji-kun, please come up here and greet your new classmates!"

Strange that such a cheerful, young woman who looked like she was barely two years past graduation from university was the homeroom teacher of the best freshman class in Rikkaidai Fuzoku Kou. Not that I minded much; I'd just expected a stricter teacher, like those in Seigaku who taught the A classes.

"I'm Fuji Syuusuke, formerly from Seishun Gakuen, Tokyo," I introduced myself. "Yoroshiku onegaishimasu."

The teacher smiled at me. "Thank you, Fuji-kun. I believe the others would have already told you that I'm Hideko Misaya, your homeroom teacher for the year."

Hideko… Misaya? Why did that sound so familiar – why did _she_ look so familiar and yet not familiar at the same time?

"Sadly, I'm not one of your sempais – that is to say, I didn't graduate from Rikkaidai," she said. "All the girls in my family went to our mother's school, Shuubijou Gakuen in Tokyo – I'm sure you've heard of it, Fuji-kun? One of my sisters just entered their high school…" Suddenly she stopped short and smiled sheepishly. "Sorry, I'm rambling. You may go back to your seat."

"It's okay," I assured her, returning to the seat next to Yukimura that he'd insisted I take.

As the lesson (biology, it so happened) began, I studied Hideko-sensei closely. Hideko. A sister in Shuubijou. Maybe if she were our age, and talked a little less, she'd might just be Hideko Misaki, the one girl I'd managed to get along with in my short time as a student in Shuubijou.

--

"The tennis tryouts are the day after tomorrow," Yukimura informed me over lunch. "If you want to practice – which I'm sure you do – the courts are always open, and there'll almost definitely be one of us there."

I frowned slightly at his tone. "I don't need to be looked after, Yukimura. You've been keeping an eye on me since you woke me up, whether directly or indirectly." At this last, I shot a look at Marui, who unfortunately didn't notice – he was too busy eating and bickering with Niou.

The blunette had the decency to look contrite. "I'm sorry. I do know you can take care of yourself; I just feel as though I need to look after you – because I _was_ the one who made you come here."

"You didn't _make_ me come," I pointed out. "I came of my own accord. You just gave me the idea."

He shrugged. "As you say." And just like that, he went back to eating his lunch, as if the case was closed already. Which it most certainly wasn't.

But just as I opened my mouth to continue my assault, Yanagi spoke up. "Fuji, don't argue here." He had that tiny, mysterious smile on his face. "Yukimura's fangirls won't appreciate a newcomer face off with their idol. And you don't have enough of a following as yet to keep them under control."

Niou leaned over and filched some sushi from Yagyuu, who was sitting on my other side. The gentleman acted as if he didn't notice. "You're getting them, though, and fast," commented the Trickster. "There'll be a fan club in your name very soon, don't you worry."

"If you're going to practice today, I don't mind discussing matters over a light rally or two," remarked Yukimura. "How about it?"

"It's best to familiarize yourself with our facilities," added the data master. "We have very different equipment, or so I hear from Sadaharu."

Sighing, I finished my ramen and put down my chopsticks. "You knew I'd come, right?"

Niou winked at me, and half the cafeteria swooned. "Of course."

Yukimura smiled, and the remaining half fainted. "So, we have a date?"

"_Yukimura_, I'm a _boy_," I reminded him firmly.

His smile only widened. "You're not, but that's why it's all the more fun."

--

**A/N: … Right. **_**Finally**_** finished this chappie. Sorry for the late update; I was totally out of inspiration and rushing Sanada's birthday ficcy 'Don't Think Sick' as well… so yeah. Check it out! XD**

**I think I'm really getting them OOC. But I loved Fuji's struggle with the tie. LAWLZ. Seigaku doesn't have one, and Rikkai does (or the middle school does) so I though she'd probably be unfamiliar with it and all… my mind works in strange ways… O.o**

**Anyways, I probably can't update for about two weeks, being as I'm off to Malaysia on a school trip tomorrow and almost immediately after that to China with my family. But I'll see if I can do anything in between. )**

**By the way, does anyone know when Mizuki's birthday is? I think someone mentioned having to rush a birthday fic for Sanada because she had to write one for Mizuki too. I'd like to write one for our wonderful purple freak. XD**

**Please REVIEW!!**


	19. Care

Chapter 18: TennisChapter 18: Care

Yukimura was bouncing a tennis ball lightly on his racket as we headed to the courts. "Ne, Fuji, is something the matter?"

I caught the ball in midair and smiled at him. "Nothing at all."

He watched me intently for a while without commenting. Pretending not to notice, I spun the ball on my finger for something to do with my hands as I waited for him to make another attempt to get me to spill.

"You're still upset about what happened at lunch, aren't you?" he ventured after a moment.

"A little," I admitted. Stopping in front of an empty court, I unlatched it and went in. Naturally, he followed. "In any case, you said that we could discuss over tennis."

So I did," Yukimura agreed. "Do you want a real match, or just light rallies?"

"We wouldn't be able to talk during a match," I pointed out, dropping my bag onto one of the benches.

The blunette did the same at the other bench before starting some stretches. "True."

We stepped onto the court after all the usual preparations. As we both got into position, he served the ball gently over the net. "The first person who's panting loses."

I hit it back. "And what happens to the loser?"

"Loser gets to be Akaya's English tutor tonight." Barely applying any force to the ball, he returned it in a high lob that only just made it over the net. I sped to retrieve it.

The ball was still in play five minutes later as we tried to force each other to move more while minimizing energy loss on our side. It was quite an interesting way to play, I reflected. Yukimura really could be tricky. Not that I didn't know that already.

Suddenly I remembered the reason for our game. "Yukimura," I began, "why do I get the feeling that you've been looking after me the whole day?"

"Maybe because I was?" he suggested, tapping the ball up and over back to me.

"May I ask why?" I aimed sharply to his left as I returned it.

"Why not?" was the provocatively teasing reply as he easily caught up to the shot.

I contemplated answering with yet another question, but finally decided against it. 'Well, I don't exactly need to be looked after."

"You're a newbie here. I'd say you do need to be looked after."

"I'd rather find the ropes myself than have them be shown to me."

He threw me an amused glance. "How about thinking of it as my overly hospitable spirit? Then, becoming serious, he said, "Fuji, if you really don't like it, I'll stop. I just thought that as 'hosts' we ought to take care of you."

I kept my poker face as I observed, "So Yukimura-kun was only doing that because it's his duty and not because he likes me. I'm hurt."

The startled look that flashed on his face was priceless, but I hung to a straight face. Before he could say anything, I continued, "He was flirting with me only for fun, when here I thought he meant it. How could he do this to me?"

Instead of getting worried, like I half-expected him to, he smiled. "You little tease, Fuji. You're panting from all that talking."

"Ah… so I am Kirihara-kun's tutor for tonight, ne?" Fielding the ball easily, I sighed a little. "Does that mean I don't get to spend time with you and the others?"

"Well… generally whoever's free will help the tutor out, since Akaya can be… a handful at times," said Yukimura slowly. He flashed me a brilliant smile. "I'll be there, at least."

"To look after me, right?" I asked, resigned.

"Partly that, and partly to make sure you don't kill each other," he replied breezily as he put his equipment away. "It won't be just me. Renji likes to keep an eye on Akaya too. Marui and Niou often come along for the ride, so it's almost like a study group."

I zipped my tennis bag shut. "I rather prefer to study on my own. Eiji's my best friend, but… when we study together… I usually end up teaching him and not studying myself."

"Well, you're joining us tonight at least," he reminded me. "But since this is your first time, I'd suggest finishing your own homework first. Akaya likes to test our limits."

Remembering the prideful boy, I shook my head. "I'm not surprised."

"Let's go back, then." The blunette headed towards the doors of the court.

I looked at him in surprise. "Aren't you going to practice more? The tryouts are in a couple of days, aren't they?"

"I'm taking you to find the buchou," he informed me. "You haven't signed up for the tennis club yet, have you?"

"No, but –"

"Shouldn't you be in the club before trying out for the team?"

"Yes, but –"

His smile was positively dazzling. "I knew you'd understand."

"Yukimura, I _can_ go by myself," I protested.

He glanced at me amusedly. "The present buchou is an odd fish. You wouldn't be able to find him on your own."

"Well, he's got to be somewhere around here, or at least someplace that is related to tennis," I tried.

"He's not Tezuka Kunimitsu. Not all tennis captains are so predictable... Aihara-buchou, for one, can usually be found at the gardens," said Yukimura casually. "In fact, his garden's right next to mine."

--

Signing up was uneventful once we'd located the buchou. Aihara-sempai – Aihara Kazuki – seemed to be a rather absent kind of person, but once you got his attention, he didn't beat around the bush. Yukimura later told me that the green-eyed brunette was actually a former Hyotei student, yet presently a senior member of the student council. Once all that was done, we returned to our respective rooms for the remainder of the afternoon.

"Oi, Fuji…" someone called from outside my door. "Open up."

Getting up from the desk, I unlocked the door to admit Marui and – no surprise – Yukimura. "Yes?"

The redhead plopped onto my bed and gave me a hurt look. "Mou, Fuji, you're so cold. Nobody locks their doors here unless they're doing something that might get them punished by the dorm head."

"My very existence is probably something punishable in this dorm," I reminded him, seating myself on the other side of the bed.

"… That's true," conceded Marui. "But, well, locked doors are considered suspicious."

"We generally only lock up when we're going to bed, and some don't lock at all," Yukimura explained. He pulled over a chair. "Sometimes people don't even close the door when they're inside."

Marui popped his bubble and grinned toothily at me. "We're mostly all good neighbors, see. Anyways, we're here as your escort for dinner and then for 'Operation: Tutor Aka-chan'!"

"Do you call him that to his face?" I inquired, curious. Echizen may have been the baby of Seigaku, but nobody would've dared call him 'Ryo-chan' unless they had masochistic tendencies and enjoyed getting knocked out by well-aimed tennis serves.

He nodded affirmatively. "Niou and I do; Mura-buchou does when he's teasing Akaya; Yagyuu does when he's Niou. Jackal, Sanada, Yanagi and Yagyuu as Yagyuu don't."

"Akaya used to get upset over it, but I think he's used to it by now," remarked Yukimura. "In any case, are you ready?"

Ah. Dinner. Right. Glancing at the loose V-neck and jeans I was wearing then at the equally casual outfits they were sporting, I decided I was presentable. "I believe so."

"Great!" Marui bounced to his feet. "Then let's get going, or everything worth eating will be sold out!" He caught my arm and just about dragged me out of my room. Yukimura, watching with an amused smile on his face, followed.

"Marui – Wait – I _can_ walk on my own," I tried to say, but the redhead seemed to not have heard. I gave up; he'd get me to the cafeteria.

Throwing open the doors, Marui called, "We're HE-ERE!!"

"_Marui-sama_!" screamed the fangirls upon seeing him.

"_Yukimura-sama_!" screamed more fangirls.

Yukimura just smiled at them. "Konbanwa." They swooned. It was all so familiar…

I tapped him on the shoulder. "Is this a daily routine?"

The pretty blunette cocked his head in thought. "We-ell, Marui and Niou love to stir up the fangirls and encourage them… and whoever's with them at the time gets the same treatment. So yes, I suppose it _is_ a daily routine." He smiled at me. "Do you miss your fan club?"

"Not especially. Even though I'm used to girls screaming over me, I'd prefer to avoid it," I told him.

"Then you'll have to savor what time you have before fangirls start accumulating," he informed me, leading the way to a table where Niou, Yanagi, and Kirihara were sitting.

Niou looked up to greet us with his mouth full. "Yo, people."

Yukimura hit him gently. "Don't talk with your mouth full."

"Seiichi plays the role of Yagyuu when Yagyuu isn't around to keep Niou in check," supplied Yanagi when I gave him a questioning look.

"Ah, I see. May I sit here?" I asked politely.

"'Course you can. You're one of us already," declared Marui, flinging himself into the seat next to Kirihara and mussing up the younger boy's hair. "And, as such, you get to help take care of the bratling."

Kirihara tried to fend off his exuberant sempai. "I'm _not_ a bratling. Get _off_ me, Marui-sempai!"

I smiled at the sight of their carefree playfulness. They reminded me of Eiji or Momo teasing Echizen.

A breath tickled my ear. "I told you we'd give you reasons to smile," whispered Yukimura, a little too close for comfort. He gave me a breathtakingly sweet smile. "Enjoy, dear Syuusuke-kun."

It was going to be a long night, but I _would_ probably enjoy it.

--

**A/N: I want to cry. This is probably one of the worst chapters I've ever written. **_**Ever**_**. Writers' block is a pain in the ass. I don't even want to try writing a long A/N. T.T It's **_**that**_** bad.**

**PS. The dorms all share the same cafeteria and other facilities.**

**Please do review… -dead-**


	20. Sleepiness

Chapter 19: SleepinessChapter 19: Sleepiness

"You're an ass."

"Well, at least I'm a _good-looking_ ass."

"Yeah, you'd totally win first prize in the beauty contest for asses. Marui Bunta, Ass of the Universe."

"_Niou_!"

Ignoring the bickering pair, I looked at Kirihara. He appeared to be in some difficulty with the work.

"Need help with that?" I offered.

He didn't reply, but I took his silence for assent. "See, the 'to' infinitive has the nominal usage, the adjectival usage, and the adverbial usage. In this case, it is being used as a noun. Understand?"

The blank stare that greeted me was not exactly encouraging. "Can you explain that in Japanese?"

I sighed, wondering how Yanagi managed to keep his sanity even though he was Kirihara's default tutor. "That's what I did."

"Maybe you should try explaining in Pig Latin," suggested Niou from the bed where he was sprawled with Marui hammering his back with a pillow. "Keep it up, Marui – it's a pretty good massage, even if it's unprofessional."

As the redhead groaned in exasperation and flung the pillow in Niou's face in a last defiance, Kirihara shot me a puzzled look. "What's Pig Latin?"

Biting back the cutting reply that longed to be voiced, I smiled and answered, "Something only Niou understands, because the rest of us are too advanced to bother learning such a basic language."

"And what is that supposed to mean?" drawled the silver-haired boy, while Marui roared with laughter.

The door opened, and Yukimura stepped in. He blinked at the scene. "Is something the matter?"

"Nothing," I said, flashing my most dazzling smile.

He smiled back. "That's good."

Perhaps I could get used to this.

--

I restrained a yawn. The hands on the clock were slowly but surely closing in to midnight, but the study session still wasn't over.

Yanagi, who was checking through Kirihara's math homework (it seemed as if the boy didn't do _any_ homework unless his teammates helped him), cast me an amused glance. "You should go and sleep," he remarked. "I'm quite sure that _they_ don't feel like sleeping any time soon, so there's no need to wait."

By _they_, he was referring to Niou, Marui and Kirihara. The former two were egging their kouhai on as he hammered fiercely at the gameboy controls, teasing him when he lost a point and cheering when he won. Yukimura, meanwhile, just watched them with not a little amusement at their childishness.

"Are they always… _this_ juvenile?" I ventured quietly so that the subject of my enquiry wouldn't hear.

The brunette shrugged. "This is their method of diffusing the stress built up during the day – gaming, teasing, eating, and generally do what is sometimes referred to as 'mindless' things. Nobody minds, and I have found no detrimental side effects of this."

"I see; they have your approval," I observed. "Though I have no idea where they're getting this energy from."

"It's pent-up from being in class in the day," he replied.

I nodded but didn't answer, and he went back to the task at hand. Yukimura glanced my way as if to check up on me, then came over.

"Let's go back," he suggested. "Your forfeit has been paid already, and I'm sure you're tired. I know _I_ want to sleep."

Returning the smile he gave me, I stood. "Okay. But…"

"Renji will be fine," the blunette reassured me upon following my gaze to the data master. "He's a veteran at this."

Yanagi raised an eyebrow at his friend, lips quirked in a small smile. "That might indeed be the most accurate term," he commented. "Go on. Fuji, if you don't get to sleep soon, you will likely have difficulty waking up tomorrow."

"Now, we can't have that, can we?" Yukimura tugged at my arm, urging me to the door. "Unless you want to be woken by Akaya's favorite –"

"I'm sure there won't be any need for that," I quickly interrupted. "Let's go."

--

I should've realized that Yukimura didn't actually say he was only going to walk me back, I ruminated a short while later in my room. When it comes to him, I really need to keep on my toes.

The blunette was currently sitting at the foot of my bed and playing with my cell phone. "You don't use this much, do you?"

"Saa… why do you think that?" Honestly, _he_ was the one who'd said I should go and sleep, so he really shouldn't be here keeping me from doing just that. And trying to make polite conversation too.

A casual onlooker – one who knew that I was a girl – would have shaken their heads in disapproval of us both. Even though we were separated by a good few feet – I was sprawled near the head of the bed – there was the undeniable fact that we were _on the same bed_ at an unholy hour of the night. Really, Yukimura might have planned it to look and feel wrong.

Suddenly my phone rang with its familiar message tone, successfully startling me out of my zombie-like state. Yukimura passed it over to me obediently. My eyes widened when I saw the message – and its sender.

"Oyasumi, Syuusuke." – Tezuka. Just that. Short and sweet.

Tezuka didn't send messages often. He messaged to remind us of extra practice. He messaged to arrange meetings for projects or student council work. He did _not_ message to wish people good night. And he _definitely_ didn't message _anybody_ at twelve midnight for anything less than an emergency, such as notifying us that someone important (i.e. a teammate) had dropped dead – though this was purely theoretical, since nobody, not even Inui, knew of an event that might make Tezuka message someone in the middle of the night.

"It's Tezuka, isn't it?" Warmth engulfed me as arms draped themselves comfortably around my shoulders and Yukimura leaned over to look at the phone's screen.

So warm… So comfortable… Jerking myself awake, I attempted to peel him off rather half-heartedly. The blunette had always had a kind of irresistible allure, and at this kind of unholy hour, it was particularly difficult to keep my head. "Yukimura, get off me," I ordered, though without bite. "Does anyone ever tell you that you're clingy?"

"As it is, not many," he replied, not letting go. I gave up and relaxed instead – I really didn't feel up to physical exertion at this time – and was rewarded with a smile that was guaranteed to make hearts flip over. "Generally, I only act clingy towards people who I'd _like_ to cling onto," Yukimura added, shifting a tiny bit closer.

_Tezuka_, a part of my mind reminded. I was supposed to be with _Tezuka_. We were together, weren't we? It'd be wrong for me to forget about him.

_Ah heck_, another part of my mind cried. Yukimura's too gorgeous. And if he didn't want me, he wouldn't be flirting so much.

I twisted my neck to look at the pretty blunette. Beautiful blue-violet eyes caught mine as his lips curled in a smile.

Just a bare inch of space – no, less than that. Too close… but I wasn't about to complain. I closed the distance, pressing my lips to his.

Kami-sama, there must have been something questionable in that keep-awake tea Niou had offered.

He smelled like citrus and clean clothes, slightly teasing yet reassuring. And he really was warm. Sleepiness from the time and impulsiveness from whatever it was that Niou put into the tea for extra effect gave me a strong urge to curl up into him like a cat into a radiator – and the spring night's chill wasn't helping.

The kiss was chaste, just a light pressure on the lips without going deeper. I couldn't help comparing this with the first time Tezuka had kissed me. He'd been rough and unsure; the way he'd held me was more as if he were afraid I'd pull away, while Yukimura just supported me, making me feel comforted and protected.

_Stop_!! yelled the prim and proper side of me. Remember how deeply in love Tezuka is with you? Remember your crush on him? Why are you kissing another boy?!

As if he'd guessed what I was thinking, Yukimura broke the contact, drawing away. "Naughty girl, Syuusuke-kun," he admonished, though obviously still teasing. "Don't try to delay your bedtime like that."

Getting off the bed, he headed for the door. As he let himself out, he glanced back at me, grinning. "Wake up by seven tomorrow, or Akaya's going to have a little morning entertainment!"

"I'll lock the door," I retorted. "Then you won't be able to do that."

"Saa… where there's a will, there's a way, ne?" The door closed, but not before I caught the playful spark in his eyes.

--

It was only the next day at breakfast that I realized I didn't have my cell phone – because it was only then that Yukimura returned it to me.

I was not especially pleased to find some interesting messages 'accidentally' sent to Tezuka – one of which read, "Seiichi-kun, don't you think that Tezuka's an uptight prick with a pinecone permanently embedded in his posterior? I mean, his social life is _dead_."

Happily, it seemed that Tezuka had either not yet seen the messages or not bothered to reply.

--

**A/N: OMG I'm REALLY, REALLY SORRY for such a long overdue update. Major writers' block is not exactly helped by drama addiction, syncro competitions AND school. School always sux after June. T.T But I'm trying to get over it… really I am!!**

**Well… as usual, an absolutely crappy chapter, though it's made even worse by the aforementioned conditions… I'm really lousy, aren't I? **

**Please Review… Please?**


	21. Torn

Chapter 20: Torn

Memory, as we all know, is selective. Even with my so-called photographic memory (it wasn't, though it _was_ better than most), the weeks after that strange night were blurred and faded impressions in recollection.

I went for the tennis tryouts, of course, and got into the team – along with Niou, Yagyuu, Yanagi, Sanada and Yukimura. Marui was 'banned from tennis until further notice' by his irate parents, who had been less than pleased with their son's relatively lackluster academic performance in comparison with his older sister; Jackal, whose family was planning to migrate to Europe now that his father had a reasonably permanent position, had opted to remain in the club instead of trying for the team. The last two positions were taken by third-year captain Aihara Kazuki and second-year Sujuuta Marehiko.

Aihara-buchou was easygoing and absentminded, but unexpectedly good at spotting the mistakes or weaknesses of anyone on the court. He knew almost all the tennis club's members by name; out of all the former team members, he was the only one who bothered with those who hadn't made it onto the team. Niou, as incurably inquisitive as always, soon came up with juicy bits of information concerning the rather dreamy, messy blonde senior – according to him, Aihara-buchou went to see the coach in private in an effort to convince him to accept his request to yield the position of captain to Yukimura and take over the freshman's present position of vice-captain, and as yet a decision had not been reached.

However, the older boy was indeed of a certain standard in his tennis, though definitely not as outstanding as the current freshmen, possibly because of a lack of passion in the sport – he treated it in a way similar to mine, as if it were simply a game, played for enjoyment, where winning or losing was of no great concern.

On the other side of the coin was Sujuuta Marehiko. Small-sized and dark, there was an unmistakable fire burning behind his violet eyes that spoke clearly of his driving willpower, one that would not be easily doused. In a way, he reminded me of Echizen – how his very life seemed to revolve about tennis and tennis alone, with no time for anything else.

Yukimura told me that his brother was one of the children who had been inmates around the time Yukimura himself was hospitalized – Sujuuta Sakuhiko, who was apparently suffering from chronically brittle bones and low blood platelet count, such that he spent much of his time in the hospital getting checkups or with broken bones and incessant bleeding. The older boy tended to isolate himself and put up a façade of rude, uncaring indifference, but from what Yukimura said, he actually doted on his weak younger brother. That made me warm to him.

We didn't have much to do with either of our two sempais apart from tennis, since we naturally stuck together as friends and acquaintances from before. Apart from the training that we went through, which was much stricter and usually more demanding than what I'd had in Seigaku, nothing really stood out in that area. Like middle school, 

we began training for the national competition immediately, but once again it was nothing I was not used to.

One day, finding myself with some rare free time, I decided to satisfy my curiosity as to Hideko-sensei. She always watched me with unreadable eyes that showed nothing to betray her thoughts, and when I remembered what she'd said on my first day – that she had a sister in Shuubijou – I wondered if she might have seen me there. And I was right to be suspicious – her sister was Hideko Misaki.

Upon seeing this, I went to see the teacher. If she knew, she obviously had no intention of informing the school, since I'd already been here for some time and she'd had plenty of opportunities to do so. If she didn't know, that was a completely different issue.

I formulated plans for a week with Yukimura and Yanagi, only to be told flat out at the monthly teacher-pupil meeting that she knew I was crossdressing – and also that, for the moment, she would not say anything. "It is entertaining," was the reason she gave. I decided that it would have to be enough, though I did remember to be extra attentive in her class as thanks. Not that I was inattentive in other classes, but that wasn't the point.

Things happened. I found a new 'Fuji Syuusuke Fan Club' website, Rikkai version. Niou managed to successfully blow up the physics lab – he apparently overcame the obstacle posed by the lack of potentially dangerous chemicals in there by using a helium pump, among other things – and got an earful from Yagyuu and the principal. Half the male population swooned over the new relief physics teacher, who had allegedly been invited to an acting company but turned it down in favor of teaching (the girls whose boyfriends drooled over her legs insisted that she hadn't been up to standard.

Yukimura enjoyed himself in his favorite pastime of making Sanada feel uncomfortable in many different ways. Marui topped his class in all his subjects, won through into the quarterfinals of the national speech competition (Yanagi researched, Yukimura wrote and Marui gave the speeches) and was finally let off the hook by his parents, though on the condition that he joined the math and science club.

But most importantly, Tezuka and the rest of my old teammates came down to visit.

--

The visit had not only been unexpected but also uncomfortable. Rikkai had never outwardly approved of Seigaku's seemingly more carefree outlook on tennis. In return, most of my old teammates thought that the Rikkai members were uptight pricks with sticks permanently shoved up their rear ends and no lives to speak of. Needless to say, they didn't get along so well.

I personally felt that it was quite a pity that they couldn't – wouldn't – put aside their differences. Admittedly someone like Sanada – whose aforementioned figurative stick probably caused him some problems wearing his hat, it was that far up – would be hard put to withstand the mindless antics of Eiji when he was on a sugar high or 

the incessant, equally mindless fights between Seigaku's resident peach and viper. But he and Tezuka would definitely have found plenty in common, not least their lack of facial expression. Yanagi and Inui would certainly enjoy having a fellow data master to compare notes with. Above all, Marui was the most likely one to integrate easily and the rest, like Kirihara or even Niou, would naturally follow.

The more I thought about it, the more it seemed that everything stemmed from each team's pride and simple, mule-headed stubbornness. Rikkai had held the throne for too long. Haughtiness was almost an innate part of their behavior, though it was mostly unconscious. They still could not release their grudge against Seigaku for stealing the titles and trophies they felt were rightfully _theirs_.

Of course, Seigaku wasn't blameless either. To try and extend a gracious hand to the vanquished, who were still licking their wounds, still with the fire of rage and the stormy pain of defeat in their eyes – they should have let the sleeping dogs lie instead of allowing them the scent of meat. Anyone with the slightest bit of tact should know better than to invite the defeated finalists out to a victory celebration. I could find no way to condemn the Rikkai players for taking our goodwill as condescension, nor blame them for holding that lingering grudge against us.

Perhaps, by transferring here, I had unconsciously added fuel to the already well-fed and roaring fire. But also because of that, both sides knew better than to show open dislike, at least once we knew what was going on. After all, nobody could have expected Seigaku to appear right at our front gates, so to speak.

"Fuuujiiiiiiiikooooooooooo!!" The familiar cry split the air, easily heard over the tapping of tennis balls with the swish of rackets and the whirr of machines that was the usual background noise of tennis practice that still went on despite it being a public holiday.

I whipped around, eyes flying open in surprise. "…_Eiji_?!" I gasped, even as a speeding blur slammed into me, knocking me flat. And then he was hugging me and demanding to know _everything_ of what I had been doing since the last time we'd met and where was the rest of the team and was there anything to eat and did he mention that he wanted to know _every single detail_ of what I'd been doing and –

Well, the long and short of it was that he was exactly as I remembered. He was still uncontrollable when hyper and still the childishly cute overgrown kid who also happened to be my best friend.

Once I registered the fact that it was _Eiji_, here in Rikkai's tennis courts, I suddenly felt a little worried. If he was alone, I could handle him and my new team without much trouble, but if he wasn't… suffice it to say that things might be a tad troublesome. "Where's everyone?" I inquired.

"Nya? Somewhere behind, I think – " Turning to gesture, he paused, taking in the scene. "Well, they _were_ somewhere behind," he finished rather lamely. I did not comment.

Tezuka and Yukimura were apparently facing off in a staring match of some sort, with that weird electric kind of vibe that they only gave off around each other. Sanada's eyes were even stonier than usual as he watched the visitors, lips set even more rigidly than normal. Niou had a familiar crease between his eyebrows and was chewing the inside of his mouth thoughtfully in the way he always did when discomfited and put off, though he never showed it when he thought people were looking. Yagyuu and Yanagi just observed what was going on, eyes hidden behind spectacles and eyelids respectively. Marui and Akaya, who had been sitting outside, apparently noticed the disturbance and were making their way over.

Meanwhile, my old teammates weren't doing too well, but most of them were naturally thick-skinned and the suspicious stares just rolled off them. Inui was scribbling away at yet another army green notebook, spectacles glowing, while Kaidoh tried and failed to suppress the heat that rose to his face under the scrutiny of so many sempais. Momo was pretending to be completely unaffected, laughing rather exaggeratedly and talking loudly to Echizen, who simply tugged his cap down and attempted to subtly disassociate himself from the loudmouth. Lastly, Oishi was hurrying over towards Eiji and I, obviously flustered and embarrassed at this turn of events.

Somehow, I felt oddly trapped. Having been in Rikkai for more than six weeks already, the feeling of affiliation to my old teammates had thinned considerably, whilst the bond to my new ones was yet in the first stages of development. Of the two teams, I couldn't really say I was one, nor could I quite claim to be the other. I was neither; I belonged to neither. I was caught on the line separating them, and it was tearing me in half.

--

"I give up!! Stop making weird noises, will you?!" exclaimed Marui, finally snapping.

Niou only grinned and emitted the odd, disgusting sound that was half-gurgle and half-retch again, obviously to irritate his friend. "It's a free country; you can't stop me."

The unfortunate redhead groaned. "Oh Kami-sama, what did I do to deserve this… Yagyuu, _do_ something, I'm begging you here!"

"What do you want me to do?" asked Niou's partner and one of the few able to moderate the Petenshi.

"I don't know… gag him, kill him, rape him, whatever shuts him up!" cried Marui, literally tugging at his hair in frustration as the silver-haired boy continued working his throat to produce yet another variation of the gurgle-retch combination.

Coughing to hide my irrepressible laughter, I kept a firm grip on my poker face as I commented, "Murder and violation are rather… drastic, to say the least."

"Desperate times call for desperate measures," declared my friend. "It's either he shuts up or I go insane."

"You're already insane, sempai," Kirihara pointed out helpfully, earning himself a death glare from the sempai concerned.

Yanagi spoke up before the ruffled tensai could blow up again. "That last option would be quite counter-productive, since I believe Niou would be significantly louder when in the throes of bliss at the hands of Yagyuu."

"Are you insinuating something?" inquired the gentleman coolly, even as the room exploded with mirth at the _very_ suggestive statement. "In any case, though I sympathize with your plight, Marui-kun, I would prefer to decline. Why don't you silence him yourself?"

"You sound like you don't want to rape him," observed the redhead incredulously.

"_You_ sound like you want to," countered Yagyuu. Marui gagged and started coughing incessantly as the team roared with laughter.

I shook my head in amused disbelief at the side of the gentleman that revealed why and how he could possibly switch with Niou even though they seemed so different. Of course, having been here for almost five weeks already, I _had_ encountered this facet of Yagyuu's character before; somehow it still took me by surprise every time.

"That is beside the point, though," said Yagyuu once everyone had calmed down enough for him to be heard. "You see, Marui-kun, Niou-kun is difficult to incapacitate. Attempting to do so consumes a large amount of energy and is usually unsuccessful."

Kirihara blinked. "Say what?"

"He means that it's very hard to kill Niou and it needs a lot of force, but isn't usually successful, so it's not worth it," translated Marui.

"Oh…" The youngest among us nodded in comprehension. "But why? Yagyuu-sempai should be able to kill Niou-sempai easily."

Leaning over, the Petenshi whacked Kirihara with a rolled-up book. "Silence, foolish mortal! Thou knowest naught what thou speaketh!"

There was a collective sweatdrop from us all. Even Kirihara forgot to yell in pain. "That was just… so… _random_," declared Marui at last, voicing what we were all thinking.

Niou shrugged. "Well, the book I hit the bratling with was a Shakespeare text," he explained, unrolling the said book. "Yup; it's Shakespeare's Julius Caesar. Why the heck do you still have this around?"

"'Et tu, Brute'," quoted Yanagi. "It was our set text the year before last, if you've already forgotten."

Replacing the book, Niou gave the data master a skeptical look. "Yeah, but I'm sure I've chucked mine out already; my house has only so much space, y' know?"

"Not that I loved Caesar less, but that I loved Rome more,'" I observed, for no particular reason.

Yukimura, who had been staring out of the window, suddenly spoke. "Is that so, Syuusuke?"

His usage of my first name was not unusual, since he always did and I'd given up trying to stop him. What _was_ unusual was his oddly empty, blank expression. When I didn't reply immediately, he turned to look at me. "Do you love Rome more than you love Caesar?"

Confused, I ventured, "I'm not sure what you're trying to ask, Yukimura."

"Neither do I," complained Kirihara. "What's with all those weird phrases anyway? And does Yagyuu-sempai still have to kill Niou-sempai?"

Marui hit the green-eyed boy over the head. "Of course he does. Niou's very existence is a plague on the earth!"

"What I was trying to say was that murdering him would be too troublesome to be worth the time; people like Niou do not die easily," clarified the gentleman, his spectacles partially concealing his eyes. "He _clings_ to life and refuses to die, the way –"

"The way I cling to my Yagyuu," his partner cut in. "I die, you die too. So there."

As the uncomfortable feeling slowly dissipated, I couldn't help but keep an eye on the pretty blunette. He seemed troubled; his earlier question was troubling. Furthermore, it had been addressed to _me_… not in the context of Brutus, but of _me_. Me, myself, and I. Yukimura had to mean something by it, and if he didn't plan to tell me, then I'd have to find out.

Moonlight filtered through the tree branches to reach the window. Yukimura's eyes were unfocused and distant, unseeing; lost in thought and brimming with something that looked unsettlingly like loneliness. I shook myself, blaming my overactive imagination on yet another of Niou's little experiments – even though I knew full well that the drinks had been prepared by Yanagi.

--

**A/N: Kill me now. I suck and I don't deny it; this update is WAY overdue. I won't even try to blame it on watching the Olympics or studying for exams – I keep making excuses; nobody believes them or cares why my life sucks when their own sucks worse. A fic is still a fic, and if a fic is written, it has the right to be completed and its readers have the right finish reading it. If anyone is still reading this, that is.**

**So yeah, this chapter is a filler. Everyone hates fillers, but sometimes they're necessary – it's equally pissing when the time frame jumps by months when you're used to it crawling by in days or even hours. Flame as much as you like. I know when I upload substandard material.**

**Please Review.**

**P.S. The quotes from **_**Julius Caesar**_** are from the full online text of Shakespeare's play. Niou's weird Old English lines were made up by the pathetic authoress here. Feel free to speculate on Yukimura's motive in using Brutus' justification for his killing of Caesar to question Fuji.**

**By the way, rhythmic gymnastics is AWESOME. Even if three teams represented former Soviet states and the Russians still won. I wanted to cry when Ukraine screwed up their second routine.**


	22. Rome

**Chapter 21: Rome**

Yukimura's strange question had cropped up only a few days after Seigaku came to visit, and I was sure they were connected in some manner. He'd started having these occasional bouts of melancholy only recently too, probably because of something that had happened during the visit. But what?

(Flashback)

"She chose us out of her own free will, not Seigaku, Hyotei or even Shitenhouji – yet you insist she was forced?" That dangerously calm, polite voice could only be Yukimura's.

"Never of her own free will would Fuji choose to betray her closest friends." The familiar, quietly confident tone was definitely Tezuka. What were they doing, talking here alone – about me?

"It was no betrayal. You agreed to cede to her choice when Atobe arranged for us all to meet." It was interesting to witness another kind of battle between these two, one of words rather than tennis. As far as I could see, they were equally matched where willpower was concerned. "She knew the options and understood the weight of her decision. Taking her family's move to Osaka into account, she would have settled on the school that could satisfy the most number of criteria. If it were Seigaku, not Rikkai, I would not be raising such a hue and cry as you are."

"I find it difficult to believe that she did not base her decision on personal desires," was Tezuka's stony reply. "Your advances on her were painfully obvious from the start."

"That argument would have more impact had it not come from the boyfriend of the person in question," Yukimura informed him, tone so frigid I could have sworn the temperature had dropped by at least three degrees. "If your theory is true, she would have chosen Seigaku from the beginning without any second thoughts – and since this was not what happened, your theory is clearly incorrect."

"I was never the boyfriend of Fuji Syuusuke." Was that bitterness I heard? "She never has and never will think of me as anything more than a captain and a friend. You, however… you are probably the one she loves. That is why she chose you, not me."

Yukimura did not answer for a long time, and the silence that fell after Tezuka finished speaking was tense beyond any other I could remember. My heartbeat thundered in my ears as heavy silence pressed down on them, weighing more with passing second; my breathing was shallow and accelerated despite the need to stay quiet so as not to be discovered. What did all this mean?

Finally, Yukimura spoke, breaking the terrible silence. "Mistakes are unforgivable; you know it as well as I do. She did not choose Rikkai for love. What came after that may have been love, but at the time when she made her decision, she had not 

known of it. In fact, if humans could change the past, she would probably choose Seigaku instead, the second time."

Shock froze me to my place for a single, devastating moment. When I recovered my ability to move, I stole away to find a place where I could be a alone to think.

(End Flashback)

As yet, I still did not know what to make of that conversation. It was probably never meant for my ears – or for any ears, for that matter. I had intruded on something clandestine that, at this moment, I was unable to fully comprehend.

Choice was the only way that exchange and Yukimura's question related. It would seem that he was asking whether I had chosen Rikkai over Seigaku after judging the schools and teams impartially without any personal bias.

Even if my guess as to the meaning of his question were correct, I had no honest answer to it. There had been so many things to consider that I could hardly remember why I'd chosen Rikkai in the first place.

That aside, what puzzled me most was Yukimura's final remark during his conversation with Tezuka. At the moment, he and I were nothing more than friends – albeit, he did like to flirt and tease… and I never really protested, even knowing that I was supposed to be Tezuka's 'girlfriend'. Yet who could really blame me, when most girls in my situation would probably have committed the same mistake?

I was capricious, as changeable as the winds – interests, hobbies, even friends never lasted very long. From the beginning, I'd taken it for granted that anything could be made different – or made to seem different – if I wanted it to be so. I could change my apparent gender as I changed clothes; I could play with the grades I got simply by adjusting the ratio between the answers I knew were correct and those I knew were wrong; I could play almost any sport or game, or rather, learn almost any skill, if I really put my mind to it. The way I could effortlessly gain what others struggled to achieve and later toss it away as something meaningless was not the best way to shape character, and I knew this well.

I could do anything I wanted – and so, I didn't want to do anything. I didn't need to play tennis. I didn't need to stay near Tokyo. Everything I did, I chose to do on a passing whim. If I felt like doing something, then I'd do it. It was that simple.

My choices of schools, friends, activities, even lovers… all were founded on ground so tiny it was negligible. I had no motive in deciding to have Eiji as a close friend or in choosing to play tennis apart from clear-cut fun and enjoyment. Loving Tezuka was only a development of the tween crush I'd had on him in the beginning that I'd happened to find interesting enough to expand upon. Choosing Rikkai was just the result of my curiosity being fueled by the sudden wide range of options made available through graduation, my family's move to Osaka and the revelation of my true gender.

But now I stopped to think. How were the people around me affected by these groundless actions? Why were they affected in that way? What had I done that caused these things? If I had done differently, what might have happened?

Bringing these to bear on the problem at hand, I wondered what impact I had given my two teams, past and present. Would they be vastly different from what they were now?

My presence or absence in itself, though I had originally thought it unimportant, was apparently the crux of the situation now. It would be presumptuous to assume that both former captains were currently in love with me, but if it were so, many things would be clearer.

Had I not entered Rikkai, I would probably never have become so close to Yukimura. Had I not left Seigaku in the first place, I would not have needed to choose a new school. Had I not needed to choose a new school, there would not have been the meeting called by Atobe, where I'd read Tezuka's diary. So many things could have been different… but it was already too late to change.

There was a small, mocking voice in my head that sounded suspiciously like Echizen. "Mada mada dane, Fuji-sempai," it said, and for once I could think of no appropriate retort.

--

"Mood swings, Fujiko-chan?" The half-teasing tone belonged to Marui, who was observing me from across the breakfast table. "You're not smiling like you normally do."

"I _do_ have other expressions to choose from, you know," I informed him, almost forgetting to remove the tartness from my voice. "Just because I like to smile doesn't mean I _have_ to smile at all times."

He smiled crookedly. "Do you think we're _that_ stupid? You and Mura-buchou are the same – you both smile even when you don't want to or don't feel like smiling. But there's a difference when you smile from your heart and when you don't, and we can see it."

"Might I point out to you that I've only been here for a number of weeks; just over a month?" Why couldn't he just leave me alone?!

"That may be so, but we know Mura-buchou well, and the same probably applies to you," he replied, unperturbed. "You should learn to let go of your poker face. Smile only when you really want to smile. You can cry if you really feel like crying, frown if you're seriously stressed out, get angry if you're truly pissed off; heck, you can bitch if you really need to bitch and get it out of your system! Nobody minds if you're _human_, Fuji."

"… Since when were you a psychologist?" Even as I said that, I gave his words some thought.

Weren't his recommendations – to do what one felt like doing – exactly what had led me to the tangled mess of a problem that I was trying to solve? But then, why did he seem to think that I wasn't doing all he thought I should – that I wasn't being _human_?

"I'm not a psychologist. I'm just a friend who cares," said Marui, his expression one of complete gravity. "I'm serious, you know; I don't joke about these things."

"So you're trying to say that I'm _not_ human?" Although I didn't show it, what he'd said made me feel… better, less depressed. Because someone actually cared, and someone actually felt that I wasn't a plague on everyone around me. The frustration that I was a useless, self-centered ass diminished significantly.

"You are, but you don't want to appear to be one," he explained. "From what I see, you think that being in constant control of any and all situations Kami-sama throws at you is the only way to prove that you are not weak. But no human can ever do that; we eventually have to crumple under the pressure and relinquish control, and let the gods play with us as they like. 'Bend before you break' – you'll live to fight again. See?"

"I don't think you're correct," I argued. "I'm not always in control of everything, though of course I'd like to be. Moreover, how does this relate to whether or not I smile?"

"You smile to show everyone that you're on top of the situation, and that you're perfectly fine, so that nobody worries about you," he answered immediately. "Same for Mura-buchou. Why do you never stop to wonder _why_ you must worry about everyone else but not yourself?"

"You're wrong again – I worry about myself, not anyone else," I retorted. "I'm self-centered, okay? You don't need to think the best of me –"

"Oh, but you _do_ worry about others," he interrupted. "You worry about Mura-buchou. You worry about Tezuka-san and the rest of your old team. You worry about how your family is doing in Osaka. You worry about plenty of people, and they worry about you too!"

"Yukimura wouldn't –" I began, but stopped short when I realized that the person in question was making his way purposefully towards our table.

"Hello, Marui, Fuji," greeted the blunette, giving us his familiar, serene smile – or was it? It was, but it was slightly… off. Not so much serene as it was sad. Was that what Marui meant, about the difference when one smiled from the heart and when one didn't?

I knew that Marui was not right when it came to Yukimura and I worrying about those around us instead of ourselves – because I knew that I was not so selfless as that, which meant that neither was Yukimura. In that at least I was human, for as everyone knows, humans are selfish beings.

That was part of why I wanted one of the few things I could not have – the best of both worlds. Could I not have loyalty without being asked for loyalty? But some things are not humanly possible, and no matter how much I wished for the contrary, I _was_ a human, and those things would forever be out of my reach.

I had never wanted to have to choose between them. In the end, that was all I could say… 'Not that I loved Caesar less, but that I loved Rome more'? No, I was not Brutus, who had chosen Rome. Nor was I Antony, who had turned against Brutus after they had killed Caesar. Perhaps I was closest to Cleopatra, who had wanted both of them, unforgivable though it was.

--

**A/N: Okay, I suck, this chapter sucks, so shoot me. T.T I'm rambling my ass off again, and I don't think I made sense at **_**all**_** during this chappie, and I haven't even proof-read it yet because there is simply **_**no**_** time, and basically I just wrote anything that had any kind of connection straight off the top of my head into this chappie. OOCness and general crappiness, I suppose.**

**Note: IMPORTANT!! I'm going on hiatus until at least 10****th**** October because I have exactly four weeks to study for the final-year exams and I don't want to feel guilty about not updating. Updating and studying **_**cannot**_** be done simultaneously. It's humanly impossible. So, since I'd really like to see straight A1s again this year like I did last year, no more updates for anything till the 10****th**** of October… hopefully some of you will still be interested, though I seriously doubt it… :-X**

**Well, please review!**


	23. Onwards

**Chapter 22: Onwards**

Everyone knows that sitting on a fence for too long will inevitably progress from uncomfortable to excruciating. I had been sitting on a fence for too long. It _had_ to start hurting eventually.

Matters came to a head when I received a message from Tezuka that stated, quite simply, that he had a girlfriend. Obviously it was an indirect way of telling me to get out of his life, effectively breaking up with me.

I felt frozen for a few days, shutting down all emotional activity of the brain until Yukimura became impatient, barged into my dorm room and pinned me to the wall before proceeding to prove to me that Tezuka was utterly superfluous, redundant and nonessential. Only after he'd returned to his room, satisfied that I was thoroughly convinced, did I realize that Niou had recorded the entire thing from the window.

We played cat-and-mouse for hours before I managed to destroy the damned memory card, much to Niou's dismay. "Bitch, that memory card had some of the most titillating pictures I have of Hiroshi!"

"You perverted, horny idiot…" Somehow, I managed to conceal my mirth, schooling my face into a stern expression. "I have to say that you deserved it."

"Now, why did you assume that I took them for my own consumption? Those pictures were for the benefit of our school's fangirl population!" defended the silver-haired trickster.

I smirked, gloating over my victory and still exhilarated from my earlier intense make-out session. "Indeed, your wallet would welcome the sudden influx of cash… but I'm sure you'd never have sold those pictures. You wouldn't be able to stand the thought of other people drooling over _your_ precious Hiroshi, now would you?"

"Well, you _do_ have a point there. Nobody else deserves to see them, so they're probably better off scrapped." Niou sighed. "Sadness… all of my blackmail material, gone… _gone_…"

Marui walked in and blinked at us. "What did you do this time?"

"And what is _that_ supposed to mean?" demanded the Petenshi. "I'm as innocent as a bird, innocent as the bright blue skies –"

"It's overcast right now," I pointed out.

Niou rolled his eyes. "_Metaphorically_, my dear blue-eyed bitch."

"Whoa there, hold up a sec and tell me what happened," interrupted the redhead before we could continue bickering. Bickering with Niou had become somewhat of a hobby for me in the time I'd spent in Rikkai – it was an endless source of amusement and a great pastime, I'd found.

"I taped her and Yukimura making out in her room," explained the other boy. "She got pissed off and killed the memory card – the precious memory card with the best pictures of Hiroshi and the most valuable blackmail!"

"… you were making out with Yukimura?!" Marui stared at me, his expression an interesting mix of surprise, disapproval and intrigue. "Sanada's not going to be pleased about this… you know, he'd finally gotten around to confessing when you walked into the picture."

I tilted my head, thinking back. "Yukimura never said anything, and from what I saw, he seemed to be with Atobe."

"He… _sort_ of _is_…" The redhead popped his bubblegum. "Well, the last I heard was Atobe's after him, but Sanada didn't really know or didn't want to know. Ne, Niou, how about calling Atobe and telling him to standby to comfort Sanada when Yukimura breaks the news?"

Niou grinned. "Good idea, man. Maybe I'll get to tape _their_ intense make-out session rather than _yours_…" That last was clearly directed at me, but I didn't comment. "Oi, bubblegum-head, when are you going to give me material on you and that sleepy guy from Hyotei?"

"For the _n_th time, old geezer, I'm _not_ with Jirou," retorted Marui. "I'm not even into guys for that matter –"

"Oh yeah? I seem to remember him declaring his everlasting love for you at stereo volume whenever he can come to our live matches," teased the silver-haired trickster. "And I know you get cakes from him, ordered from high-end patisseries –"

"Hyotei's people are all rolling in cash; it's nothing to them," the other boy reminded him. "Seriously, I'm _not_ with him."

"How does his being rich have to do with you not dating him?" Niou wanted to know. When the redhead struggled to find an answer, he continued, "Denial's unhealthy for you. Sometimes you should just go with the flow of things, you know?"

Sulking, Marui pointed at me. "You should be telling _her_ that, not me!"

I glanced at him. "Why me?"

"You're the best example of a rebel," he explained. "Well, Niou used to be, but you really take the prize. Even Niou didn't crossdress."

"Don't be so sure," warned the trickster. "You don't know all there is to know about me, bubblegum-head."

"Does that mean you _did_?" I leaned forward, intrigued.

Niou smirked. "What if I did?"

Marui groaned, covering his face with his hands. "No way… were you a drag queen or something?!"

"Eh? Who's a drag queen? Fukubuchou?" Ambling in just in time to catch Marui's words, Kirihara stared at us, horror and excitement in his eyes.

The silver-haired boy roared in laughter. "_Sanada_?! Kami-sama, you never cease to amaze me…" Calming down a little, he added, "Then again, he might just be distraught enough to agree if I invited him, what with Yukimura and all…"

"Invite Atobe," I suggested. "The atmosphere would be tremendously conducive for them."

"Hear, hear," agreed the two older boys, grinning wickedly.

Kirihara looked rather lost, not understanding the absurdity of it all. "So… Atobe's a drag queen?"

That drew another round of laughter from us. Even I couldn't restrain myself at the bizarre mental image of Sanada and Atobe in lacy black mini-dresses, knee-high boots, colorful shawls and heavy makeup.

--

"Ne, Yukimura?" I addressed him later that evening. "You _do_ know that Sanada likes you, right?

He considered this for a moment. "Yes, I suppose you could say that… and yes, I wouldn't have minded dating him. It's a free country."

"I never said otherwise. But why did you want me when you had him already and I… well, I had Tezuka?" I asked, banishing my embarrassment in the blunt question.

"Why not? Besides, I'd heard that Atobe was stalking Genichirou, so I'm sure he wouldn't be lost and alone because I decided to date you instead of him," the blunette pointed out. "In fact, I'm quite surprised that rich brat hasn't barged in and swept him away in a flourish of gold and perfume."

"That sounds like Atobe, all right," I agreed, sitting next to him.

The awkwardness of sitting on a bed with boys was probably much worse for normal girls than it was for me – it felt almost normal. After all, there wasn't very much other furniture to choose from. The bed was about the only item that could fit more than one person.

Yukimura smiled softly and pulled me a little closer. I breathed in his scent, a mix of clean clothes, citrus and…. something just inexplicably _Yukimura_. Maybe the time he'd spent in hospital had left him with a permanent whiff of antiseptic… or the flowers he so loved had managed to mark him with their perfume…

Just then, my cell phone rang, shattering the quiet we'd been sharing. Muttering darkly, I answered it. "Nee-san…"

"Syuusuke? Is something wrong – no, did I call at an inconvenient time?"

"The _most_ inopportune moment. I swear you do this on purpose, Yumiko-nee-san." I'd used my sister's name so that Yukimura would understand what was going on. "So, why did you call?"

"I wanted to ask if you were planning on returning this summer," she explained. "You still haven't seen the new Osaka residence, and Yuuta says he'll come if they don't get to the Nationals."

Summer? It might be problematic… "Ah. I'll check if I can, ne? It's not very likely, but I'll do my best… Ja ne, Nee-san."

"In a hurry to get back to your pretty boy, aren't you?" she teased. "I just saw you in my crystal… well, ja, Syuusuke." The call ended.

"I wish she wouldn't keep catching me at the worse times on her crystal," I complained. "It feels like I'm a television broadcast that she tunes into now and then; there's no privacy."

"Does she do this often?" inquired Yukimura.

I sighed. "Well, last time she used to scry for me only when she's worried about where I am or what I'm doing… now, I'm not so sure. She's decent enough, though; she doesn't scry for fun. If Niou could scry, he'd probably use it to get blackmail on everyone and anyone."

"Then we should just thank Kami-sama that Niou is unable to scry," concluded the pretty blunette, his eyes sparkling in amusement.

At that moment, there was a knock on the door, and Niou himself strode in. "Sorry if I interrupted you two lovebirds, but you didn't lock the door, so it's your own fault," he began, talking at the rate of a machine gun. "Atobe has forgotten about Sanada and apparently is currently into Jirou."

"Poor guy," both of us chorused at once, then broke into laughter at how similar our opinions were.

"Yes, I pity him too, but that's beside the point. What are you going to do about Sanada now, Yukimura? He's got nothing to fall back on now…" The green-eyed boy ran his fingers through his hair, clearly frustrated. "And we'd planned out a date for them already!"

Yukimura frowned slightly. "Hmm… this _does_ seem to pose a problem. Syuusuke, we'll talk later, okay?"

"Mm, sure," I replied. "I need to talk to you about what Yumiko-nee-san called about."

--

**A/N: Finally back on !! Wheee!! Sorry I took so long to update, but there were celebratory parties after the exams and I was also updating my other fics… for some reason, post-exam seems busier than pre-exam… O.o**

**I personally find this chapter a little abrupt, but I didn't really want to describe the whole break-up-and-hook-up process (because this fic is much too long for it's own good already and I'm also an incurably lazy bum who can't write fluff to save her life) but more of what Fuji was like **_**after**_** it. And then there's a little hint to what's coming later… -mysterious smile-**

**Review please! Oh, and tell me if you think I should edit out the last few chapters' angst and thought processes… I won't waste time on it if you think it's fine… :-X**


	24. Clash

**Chapter 23: Clash**

"No." His tone brooked no argument.

I sighed. "Yukimura, please…"

"It'll be the Nationals, Fuji. Our debut on the high school tennis circuit. I cannot let you skip out on us simply because your family would like you home." I could see steel glinting in his normally soft eyes. "We'll meet Seigaku Koukou in five weeks in the Kantou Regional Finals if things go as per normal."

"Is that supposed to help convince me?" I inquired. "I personally would like to avoid having to play against my old team, you know."

Yukimura's lips tightened slightly. "Did you think you had a choice? Whether you are a girl, a boy or a chimpanzee, you're on the Rikkaidai tennis team. It does not matter who our opponents are so long as we crush them in the end."

"Surely there is time in between in which I can drop in for a short visit with them," I persisted. "Maybe even before the Kantou Regional Finals. We might be able to train there if you want – all I'm asking is five days in Osaka."

Our eyes met, steel and sapphire clashing in a battle of wills. Silently, I tried to remind him through my eyes of my extended separation from my family and Yuuta; tried to give him an idea of how much I missed them. Three months was a long time, especially when I was so used to having them barely an arm's length away, always there the moment I reached out.

Finally, he relented. "I shall put your request through to Aihara-buchou this weekend if you still stand by your decision."

I smiled with real joy. "Thank you so much, Yukimura. I owe you."

"If by chance our match is postponed by five or more days, it may be possible to fly down to Osaka for intensive training in harsher environmental conditions." The blunette turned back to the papers on his desk. "However, I cannot promise you anything on this count."

"I know, but at least you'll try, ne?" I seated myself behind him on the foot of his bed. "Thanks, really. I haven't seen Yuuta for so long… "

"Sometimes I find it hard to believe he's really your brother and not your boyfriend," Yukimura remarked, going through the pile of documents quickly and efficiently.

His wry comment drew a laugh from me. "Jealous, are you?" I teased.

He shrugged. "Not particularly."

"You're very sure of yourself, aren't you?" I asked, intrigued by his sudden uncharacteristic nonchalance.

"Naturally. You're all mine." The '_now that Tezuka's out of the picture'_ was left unsaid, but we both knew it.

Standing, I hugged Yukimura around the shoulders from behind. "I like that."

He smiled. "I know you do."

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Matches flew past in a blur of opponents, medals and soul-searching. Players good enough to make us sit up and take notice were few and far between, at least for the first few preliminary competitions, and I found to my horror that I had slipped into the very same practice I hated – that of treating my opponents as though they were of no importance.

It was exactly the same reason I had once hated Rikkaidai. I unconsciously mimicked the way my new teammates brushed past other unknown players without a glance at them, the way they won in under fifteen minutes without dropping a single point, the way they completely discounted their opponents' dignity and self-respect. Surrounded by people who did all these things with no second thoughts, it was some time before I noticed this.

I returned to my senses only on overhearing Niou complaining to Marui, well within his recently defeated opponent's hearing, that he'd barely begun to warm up at match point. To make things worse, the unfortunate boy's family and friends had come to see his match. He lost face in front of them, not only because he'd lost, but also because the person he had lost to had barely broken a sweat.

That really jolted me. I struggled to recall if I had ever thought of my opponents' feelings in any match I had played as a member of Rikkai's tennis team. Had I considered dropping points or even games so that their pride could be salvaged even after the ultimate defeat? Or had I simply sailed through without turning a hair and left behind a trail of destruction in my wake?

This was Rikkai's way. This was what the Kings believed in – this utter domination of other teams, other players, other people, this merciless clearing of a path for themselves all the way to the finals of the National Championships. This was the other side of my friends, the side I did not want to see.

Still, I had to admit that they weren't entirely at fault. It was ingrained in them – trophies and medals were not their goal but their right, and had been so since they began playing tennis. Thinking back, I had to confess that in this respect they and I were similar. Yet I'd never had quite the same conqueror's mentality.

To me, tennis was tennis – a sport, a skill, a game. I could probably never be able to live and breathe tennis quite the way my present teammates did. Perhaps that was why I often felt as though a glass wall separated my friends from me, wrought by our dissimilar mindsets.

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"So… what were the results of the draw?" asked Niou, leaning back in his chair so that it was balanced on two legs and stretching luxuriously.

We were packed in Yukimura's room after dinner, waiting to hear the news. As fukubuchou, he had accompanied Aihara-buchou to Tokyo to see who our opponents for the Kantou Regional would be.

The pretty blunette smiled. "We're meeting a team called St Rudolph first. Aihara-buchou and I believe that the next team we'll play is Rokkaku High. He's probably worked out more possible subsequent opponents – Renji?"

"I'll report to you by tomorrow evening," answered the data master promptly. "Contextually, neither of these two teams should pose us too much of a problem."

Rokkaku High? Saeki was highly likely to be on their team. I hadn't seen him for ages… to think that, just like the last time, we'd meet again in the Kantou Regional!

And as for St Rudolph… well, Yuuta wasn't in high school, but that purple freak was. It would be a nice opportunity to remind him to keep his mouth shut on my secret. Also, he was definitely one person I had no reservations about publicly humiliating.

"Fuji?" A hand waved in front of my face. "Fuji, you there? Earth to Fuji…"

"What?" I blinked away the gory images of bloodstained purple, only to be confronted by pair of mischievous green eyes. "Too close, Niou…"

Yagyuu sighed and pulled his partner off of me, sending an apologetic look to Yukimura at the same time. "Niou-kun, behave."

"Yes, yes, Hiroshi," grinned the silver-haired boy. "Just wanted to help dear Fuji here out of her daydream. I swear she was about to start drooling…"

"Oh really? Who were you thinking of?" Yukimura looked at me, his eyes teasing.

"Saa… someone I would dearly love to rip up," I replied, knowing I sounded evil and not caring.

Niou laughed and pretended to shiver. "How bloodthirsty… might that person happen to be me?"

"No, don't worry. He's from St Rudolph," I explained. "He nearly destroyed Yuuta; I haven't forgiven him."

The Petenshi looked surprised. "Man do you know how to bear a grudge!"

Yanagi nodded. "Research shows that females tend to bear grudges for a much longer period than males."

That drew a whistle from Niou. "Remind me to stay on your good side, Fuji."

"Actually, that's one of the few clues to your true gender," mused the data master. "Of course, one would only notice it after long and close association, so it is no cause for anxiety."

"For which I am grateful." I yawned and looked around. "Ne, where's Sanada?"

Yukimura shrugged. "Probably in the kendo gyms, avoiding me."

I quickly backtracked. "Sorry, I didn't mean –"

"It's not your fault," he interrupted. "Don't keep apologizing for it."

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As I'd expected, Saeki was on the Rokkaku High team. They were up against Yamabuki first. I found him warming up with his teammates, still relaxed and chatting easily with Itt-chan though others were silent and stony with competition nerves. _Same old Saeki_, I thought, amused.

The Rikkaidai uniform I wore was attracting attention from the spectators and players. I could hear the suspicious whispers and discreet pointing from all sides. By now, I was more or less used to it; it wasn't as if Seigaku hadn't gotten enough of this before. It only meant that I didn't actually need to try to get noticed.

Sure enough, Saeki caught sight of me a minute or so after my arrival. I smiled at him and indicated that he come out of the court. He looked rather puzzled, but soon complied.

"Fuji? Is that you?" was the first thing he said. His incredulity was obvious.

"Yes, it _is_ me," I reassured him. "Did you think I would wear the Rikkaidai uniform for fun?"

"You would," he pointed out.

"True," I conceded. "Well, I'm not. I'm in Rikkai now, Saeki."

The bleached-haired boy frowned a little. "Why? Don't those people hate you for beating them last year?"

"Not really… It's a long story, and there isn't enough time right now," I hedged quickly. "Maybe we can talk later – no, how about tomorrow? Will you be in town?"

"Nope, we'll be back in Chiba again," he answered. "The next match will be on Thursday… Perhaps this weekend? We'd have some time –"

"This weekend would be too late," I cut in. "I'll go to your place tomorrow afternoon, okay?"

Saeki looked vaguely amused and also quite confused by my insistence, but he let it go, just as I'd thought he would. "Tomorrow afternoon? Very well, then; I assume you'd like me to meet you at the bus stop or something?"

"You assumed correctly," I replied. "I don't think I can find my way around there the way I used to."

"Of course you wouldn't – you moved away, what, four, five years ago?" He shrugged, the picture of nonchalance. "Don't worry about that. You're my friend, remember? I'll take good care of you."

I smiled. "Thanks, Saeki."

"No problem. Hey, I have to go back; Itt-chan's calling me." He rested a hand on my shoulder in the old, familiar way he used to, the gesture he employed to extend comfort, reassurance, camaraderie and sympathy. "I'll see you tomorrow then, Fuji." With a final wave, he turned and began making his way back to his teammates.

"Tomorrow," I repeated, also waving before heading back to my teammates. Unbidden, memories resurfaced before my mind's eye.

Saeki and I, playing tricks on teachers and students alike (there was that useful old whoopee cushion), making a game out of whatever detention they gave us… the two of us and Yuuta swinging, crawling, leaping in the maze of Oji's wooden creations… all three of us sprawled on the beach, counting the stars, as our families chatted over the barbecue pit…

That was all so long – almost a decade – ago, so far in the past. That was the Saeki I'd risked life and limb with, albeit he'd always thought I was a boy. That was the Saeki I had loved as a child, yet never tried to be more than a best friend to.

Saeki Kojirou – my first crush, my first close friend, my first contradiction. In some strange way, he was an anchor, a constant presence that never completely abandoned me. If he couldn't help me sort myself out, I didn't know who could.

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**A/N: Here's the next chappie, at long last. I'm really sorry for being so late to update… T.T see, there were some rather consuming school activities over the last week, and I only managed to start writing a couple of days ago…**

**I've fallen back in love with Yukimura and Saeki – I watched bits of the Kantou Regional again to get inspiration. They're just so **_**gorgeous**_**… -fangirls crazily-**

**Please review!**


	25. Appearances

**Chapter 24: Appearances**

"What was all that about?" inquired Yukimura when I arrived back in our courts.

"Maa, nothing much – just meeting an old friend," I replied. It was not a lie, but neither was it quite the whole truth.

He raised one slim eyebrow. "And who might this old friend of yours be?"

"Saeki Kojirou, of the Rokkaku High tennis team," I answered. "I haven't seen him for ages."

"Hmm…" The look on the pretty blunette's face was thoughtful; he did not reply immediately.

Yanagi glanced at me. "Rokkaku High? There is an 85 percent chance of us meeting them in the next round."

"I know," I reassured him. "That wasn't why I went to see him."

"So… why did you go and see him?" asked Niou, green eyes dancing in mischief.

I shrugged innocently. "I just missed him a little, that's all."

"'That's all', eh? Looks like Yukimura's got competition again," declared the trickster, poking his doubles partner. "Right, Hiroshi?"

Yagyuu looked vaguely pained. "Niou-kun…"

"Yeeeees, _Hiroshi_?" drawled the silver-haired Petenshi, dragging out each syllable on purpose.

Not too far away, Sujuuta-sempai glanced up from his tennis bag and cast a weird look at Rikkai's best doubles pair before returning to his rummaging. I suppressed the laugh that welled up in my throat. He certainly wasn't very observant, if this was the first time he'd noticed them.

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St Rudolph was completely crushed, 3-0. It was a foregone conclusion. They barely looked disappointed – they seemed more than happy to have taken a game or two from us.

I sought out the purple freak for a gentle reminder that I was able to kill him at any point in time should he decide to reveal my secret. Having lost to Yanagi and I (I had requested for a doubles placing, and Yanagi had offered to be my partner), he took it better than he had the last time we had met.

"Hello," I greeted him smilingly. "It's been a while, hasn't it?"

"Ah, Fuji Syuusuke-kun." He controlled his expression quite well, managing a smile in return instead of the scowl I expected. "I was very interested to see that you made it into Rikkaidai's team. Might I inquire as to whether they know of your… gender issues?"

"Naturally, they do. However…" I opened my eyes, pinning him with a warning glare. "I expect you to uphold your side of our bargain. Remember, you are a hundred years too early to beat me, even though you're a male and I'm not."

He flinched slightly. "Yes, yes, of course. But how did you get Rikkai to approve of –"

"That is for me to know and for you to forget about," I cut in. "Some things require a level of understanding that I am sure is beyond your comprehension." With that, I ended the conversation, leaving him standing frozen and gaping like a fish in shock.

Rokkaku's match was almost over, and I contemplated staying to see Saeki again. Realizing that my teammates were waiting for me, I rejected the idea and went to join them instead.

"Sorry for making you wait," I said, actually meaning my apology. They had waited for me while I had spoken to the purple freak and stopped over to watch Rokkaku's match, wholly oblivious to their suffering.

Aihara-buchou just smiled. "It's okay. Just remember that we must move as a team, ne?"

Receiving a nod of assent from me, he turned and led us to the buses we had come on. The others followed; I fell into step alongside them.

"Ne, since we're pretty close by, would you mind accompanying me to the hospital?" Yukimura suddenly asked.

"Eh?" I glanced up at him in surprise before I remembered. "Oh… to visit those kids, is it?"

"Yes. I believe Sujuuta-sempai will also be going to see his younger brother there…" He considered this for a second. "Perhaps I shall venture to ask him…"

Yukimura fell back to walk with the older boy, who was following at the tail end of the group. He looked quite surprised at being addressed by the pretty blunette. I couldn't blame him; we rarely communicated with him, and he'd made little effort to change this.

Niou fell into step beside me almost as soon as the blunette left. Noticing the mischievous glint in his eyes, I quickly gave him my full attention.

"So tell me," he began, "are you bored of Yukimura already, or what?"

"Why would you think that I'm bored of him when I'm not?" I returned.

He shrugged. "Well, you seemed very eager to see that white-haired Rokkaku guy and all… Saeki, was it?"

Nodding, I countered, "He's a _childhood friend_, Niou."

"Does he know you're a girl?" The trickster grinned as my eyes flicked open in surprise. "Didn't think so…"

About to protest that I was planning to tell him, I closed my mouth again. Saying that would just be playing into his hands… still, I was having a little difficulty thinking of something else to say.

Luckily, Yukimura returned at that point, shooing Niou away with a single, pointed look. "Sujuuta-sempai and us will visit the hospital together," he told me. "I'll just inform Aihara-buchou that we'll make our way back on our own."

"Okay; I'll meet you at the gates soon." When he raised an eyebrow in question, I added, "I need to go to the washrooms."

His expression cleared in comprehension. "Sure. I'll see you soon."

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Sujuuta-sempai made a beeline for his brother the moment we entered the hospital's pediatric activity room for live-in patients – commonly referred to as the children's playroom.

The skinny boy's face practically glowed. "Aniki!"

The other children flocked to Yukimura with joyous exclamations of "Mura-nii-san!" He laughed and bent to hug them, their happiness reflected in his beautiful indigo eyes.

I leaned back, watching them rather than taking part in the proceedings. Both of my teammates seemed to have dropped their guard, forgetting about the facades they usually wore.

This was the first time I had ever seen Sujuuta Marehiko smiling, and smiling freely at that; if I was not mistaken, his eyes had lost their normal hard cast and become almost soft. He clearly cared very deeply for his frail younger brother.

Meanwhile, Yukimura seemed to have shed a great burden all of a sudden. His smiles were real, his laughter carefree. It felt as though I hadn't heard him laugh like that in a long time.

I wondered what had been casting a pall over his features for so long.

Thinking back, I realized that he had had an almost permanently serious expression for much of the past couple of months. He'd probably never admit to it, but from what I could see, tennis had been more stressful for him than I'd thought.

Perhaps it was the weight of the responsibility he had to bear that was causing the stress. Yukimura had been awaiting treatment in this very hospital this time last year. Even though he seemed well enough at present… were I in his shoes, I would be more than a little worried that my health would deteriorate again. His immunity was more likely than not lower than optimum; he was highly susceptible to disease.

_Yukimura_… I had to suppress an unexpected but strong urge to hug him tightly and never let him go.

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It was sunset when we finally boarded the bus back to Kanagawa.

The vehicle was almost empty but for us three and a few adult businesspeople, probably heading home from work. Thankfully, there were no other stragglers from Rikkai; else, we'd have been pestered throughout the journey by incessant fangirl screams.

I allowed myself to lean softly against Yukimura, who was sitting in the aisle seat on my right, and stared out of the window at the fading streaks of orange low in the sky. "Ne, Yukimura…"

"Hmm?" He was still in a good mood, almost like a leftover glow from our visit to the hospital.

"Can I ask you for a favor?" Blatant, blunt, but that couldn't be helped.

Turning his head, he gently pressed his lips to my hair. "Anything."

An emotion that felt uncomfortably similar to guilt coursed through me. _Saeki_… I needed to see him. He would surely be able to help me sort out my tangled mess of thoughts and emotions.

It still didn't feel entirely right to leave Yukimura. If anything, it felt almost… selfish.

I was going to skip out of practice for – frankly speaking – self-serving reasons. Working out my mind wasn't exactly something that would help the greater good of mankind. However, _not_ working it out would likely prove actively detrimental to relationships all around me. I still felt bad for Sanada.

Why? Why did I care that I might have hurt a person who exchanged little more than greetings with me every day? Why did I mind that Yukimura seemed less guarded around the hospital children than he seemed with me? Why did I still feel a hard knot in my chest that refused to disappear each time I thought of Seigaku – of Tezuka?

Why did I squander valuable mind space reconsidering – _doubting_ – so many of the decisions I made?

"Syuusuke?" Yukimura was looking at me, concern plain in his expression.

My given name slipped off his tongue without thought… yet, I couldn't remember ever having called him anything but Yukimura.

"Let me go to Chiba tomorrow."

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**A/N: Updated in five days! I amaze myself, sometimes…**

**Well, it's shorter than the previous chappie, but I hope you like it. I actually planned to write about Fuji going to Chiba in this chappie, but it seems that that shall have to wait for the **_**next**_** chappie… which, since I have an idea of what to write for it, will not be long in coming. ^^**

**The whole hospital visit thing just appeared from nowhere; I'd not planned anything like that at all. Besides, it was so long ago… anyways, the first hospital visit was in chapter 3-4, and the description of Sujuuta Marehiko (sempai) was in chapter 20. I'm sure everyone's forgotten about him; he **_**is**_** pretty insignificant, at least thus far.**

**As you can see, there is still hope for the Perfect Pair fans! XD I hope the Smiling Pair fluff was okay… tell me what y'all think, ne?**

**Please Review!**


	26. Shadow

**Chapter 25: Shadow**

The train slowed, gliding smoothly to a stop. "_Chiba City. Chiba City._"

I alighted unhurriedly and looked around to get my bearings. The place hadn't changed much, and I had little difficulty finding the bus stop. Once there, I boarded one headed for my old district – the Rokkaku district, where Saeki stayed.

The bus wasn't very crowded; I found a seat for myself with no trouble. If I remembered correctly, the journey would take five to ten minutes.

(Flashback)

I allowed myself to lean softly against Yukimura, who was sitting in the aisle seat on my right, and stared out of the window at the fading streaks of orange low in the sky. "Ne, Yukimura…"

"Hmm?" He was still in a good mood, almost like a leftover glow from our visit to the hospital.

"Can I ask you for a favor?" Blatant, blunt, but that couldn't be helped.

Turning his head, he gently pressed his lips to my hair. "Anything."

(End Flashback)

At least Yukimura had kept his word – he had let me go, even though he clearly did not want to.

He was learning. That was good. In all the time I had had with Tezuka, he had never really understood that I needed my freedom.

However, Yukimura knew how stifling it could be, confined to his bed by his illness and surrounded by people harping on how he needed to be extra careful about every single miserable thing. Perhaps my little excursion wasn't inherently good, but it did have the potential to be beneficial. What was life without a little risk?

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Saeki was waiting at the bus stop, just as he'd said he would be. I smiled; with those sharp eyes that missed nothing, he looked watchful even though his stance was casual.

"I was about to go and get you from the train station, just in case you've forgotten which bus to take," quipped my old friend. "I guess I didn't need to worry, after all."

"Saa… have I really been gone that long?" I asked, only half-joking.

He shrugged as we started off in the direction of his house. "You moved out five years ago, even if you do come back occasionally. Remember, we met last year when Seigaku decided to come to this beach to train?"

Five years? Somehow, it didn't feel that long. "Ah yes; your freshman buchou scolded us for bothering Oji, that time."

"Yeah, it gave us something to laugh about for a good few months after that," Saeki said. "But since most of us have graduated, Kentaro probably won't get teased about it anymore."

The old, familiar banter had an almost soothing effect on me, after having endured a long series of violent upheavals in various aspects of my life over the past few months. Regret cast a shadow over it all, though; I had to wreck the peace once more.

Saeki spoke again, pulling me from my thoughts. "So, Fuji, why were you so insistent on coming?"

"What, I can't come because I miss my old friend?" My smile was the essence of innocence.

He laughed. "I wouldn't mind that, but I'm sure you've got something pressing to talk about or you'd make do with an online video conference."

"You know me too well," I sighed, pretending to be disappointed that my ploy had not been effective.

Saeki only grinned. "Let's stop here."

I glanced around. It was Oji's playground, where Eiji had had so much fun that last visit. "Saa… it's grown again, hasn't it?"

"It's as if it's alive," he agreed. "Oji never tires of building more playground equipment."

"What happened to the kids, though?" I asked. The playground looked oddly abandoned without the small bodies swarming all over its equipment.

"No idea. Maybe they're being forced to clean their rooms." Saeki and I shared a laugh at the memory of getting grounded by our mothers until our rooms were cleaned to their satisfaction.

I took a seat on one of the tires nailed to the wooden A-frame, gripping it with my knees and feet while leaning back for balance. The unforgiving Chiba sun beat down hotly; I could almost feel my exposed skin starting to tan and the jacket I wore was uncomfortably warm. "Maa, I _do_ have something important to talk to you about…"

Saeki folded himself onto one of the low stepping logs opposite and glanced up at me, quirking an eyebrow. "Well, go on; spill."

Showing was probably better than telling in this instance. Besides, I was already sweating inside my jacket. Taking a deep breath, I shed it, revealing the camisole-like, unmistakably feminine top that I had on underneath.

"What –" His other eyebrow rose to join the first, eyes widening in surprise. I met them squarely.

"Yes, I'm a girl," I told him. "I'm not crossdressing for some weird perverted reason."

For a moment, he said nothing, and I had a horrible feeling that he was going to get angry with me for lying to him for so long – just as Tezuka had. _No…_

Then, to my ultimate astonishment, Saeki started to laugh. He laughed and laughed, so hard that he could barely catch his breath. My surprise began to turn to worry – was he hysterical, strange as it would be?

"Kami-sama… Fuji…" Saeki gasped, doubled up in mirth. "Did you really think I never guessed?"

I stared at him, at a momentary lost for words. _He'd known…?_

"I wasn't as observant as I could have been, I give you that," he continued, his eyes still sparkling with merriment. "And you were very careful, too. I only started wondering not long before you left for Tokyo."

"You… knew?" I ventured, unsure of whether or not to believe this completely unexpected development.

"No, I _guessed_," he corrected. "I made an educated guess. You had just too many little oddities that neither you nor anyone else could explain – you hated urinals, you preferred wetsuits over trunks, you rarely engaged in physical violence unless Yuuta was concerned… I could go on, but I don't think you need to hear them all. The only reason I could think of for all this was that you were Fuji Syuusuke, and thus had the right to as many oddities as you liked."

I could only gape at him speechlessly. Had I really been so easy to figure out?

"So I wondered. I took more notice of your weird habits and preferences and tried to reason them out. What really got me thinking was the way you seemed to have no feeling for girls of any sort, apart from basic friendship – which you extended to everyone regardless – despite us all being at an age when we start wondering if we should 'grow up' and get girlfriends." Saeki seemed to have calmed down now; he wasn't so short of breath as before.

"You guessed I was a girl just from _that_?" I asked, incredulous. "I thought I covered all my bases! And _you_ for one didn't have any special interest in girls at the age of ten, so –"

"Or so you think," he said, almost cryptically. I subsided.

There was a moment of silence as I tried to reorganize my thoughts. Saeki watched me, his deep blue eyes unreadable, before speaking again. "Was that all you wanted to talk about…?" he inquired.

"No," I admitted. "But you had to know I was a girl first, so…"

"That's alright," he reassured me. "As it is, now that I know, I too have something to tell you."

"And what would that be?" I asked, curious.

If he wasn't always so sure of himself, I would have thought his expression awkward. "I… I've got a girlfriend," he confessed.

_A girlfriend_. _Saeki._

Something inside me shattered.

"Saa… that's nice," I commented, forcing a light tone into my voice and a smile onto my face. "Congratulations, Saeki."

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I adjusted the hem of my capris and retied my shoelaces absently, watching the scenery flick past without really seeing it. A raindrop rolled down the window; I observed it morbidly, wondering why it had fallen away while its companions still clung tenaciously to the glass, protected in the train's slipstream.

Saeki's girlfriend had been quite decent. With her flyaway dark hair, mischievous smile and endless cheer, she matched him well. Her name was Takagi Mika; she was a dancer and gymnast, and it showed in the lean muscles of her long limbs. We got along without much trouble.

But Saeki was _mine_. At least, he _had_ been mine… till Mika had come into the picture.

I shook my head, mentally berating myself. Who was I to be jealous of Mika? Saeki wasn't even supposed to have known I was female until today. Besides, I had Yukimura…

Albeit that given a choice, I'd probably pick Saeki over Yukimura.

Good Kami-sama, what was I thinking?! I _didn't_ have a choice. And I really liked Yukimura. Just…

Saeki had always been a constant in my life. He'd been a part of it since the time I had beaten him in my first tennis competition to take the championship. Though most of my friends here believed he was an old rival of mine, it had never been much more than friendly rivalry; greeting each other with a reminder of our last match was a habit left over from those days.

We'd been through a lot together. He was like the twin I'd never had, my shadow, my support, my partner in crime. We suffered together, we had fun together, we were inseparable…

It was hard for me to adjust to him having another person in the place I had once held.

Comparing Yukimura to Saeki was unfair. Saeki was more like a member of my family; Yukimura more like a lover. Sadly, humans are rarely able to enjoy the best of both worlds…

After he'd told me about Mika, I'd refrained from saying anything about why I'd come. It was too awkward to talk about _me_ in front of them, since I was expected to be curious about all the usual things – how they'd met, how long they'd been together, etc. In the end, my visit had been rather less fruitful than I'd hoped it would be.

Still, it _had_ cleared up quite a few of my doubts; it hadn't been a complete waste of time. Some things were now much clearer than they had been before.

I pulled out my cell phone and typed a message to Saeki: "_I'll be going to visit Nee-san and Yuuta in Osaka later this month; would you like me to bring back some Nee-san's raspberry pies that Yuuta and you love so much?_"

A few minutes later, my phone vibrated, and I flipped it open to see Saeki's reply. "_You still remember? Well, thanks; if it's not too much trouble for you._"

"_No problem. I'll bring extra for you to share with Mika-san,_" I typed.

Once again, the reply didn't take long. "_Don't poison it, Fuji…_"

I felt my lips curl into a more honest smile than any other today. My fingers flew over the keypad. "_^^ Saa… I have no idea what you're talking about…_"

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**A/N: Once again, I'm very sorry for the **_**very**_** late update. I've been suffering from interminable muscle cramps in my shoulders, back and neck, not to mention tension headaches as a side effect, and using the computer for **_**anything**_** only exacerbates the problem. But I've been undergoing treatment and am recovering steadily.**

**However, with my packed schedule (treatment, dance, music, tuition upon tuition upon tuition, treatment, dance, music…), I am truly strapped for time to write my fics. In addition, I have three fics to update, two of which I have little inspiration for (Who Am I is one of the two; the other is Love Me Hate Me) and a third I shouldn't be updating as frequently as I am because these two are already uploaded and have greater priority.**

… **So, in conclusion, updates will probably take a while in coming in spite of it being the holidays. Again, I'm really sorry… :-X I'm doing my best, but it doesn't seem like I can finish this fic by the end of the year – the end of this month, rather. –hides from angry readers' rotten eggs and tomatoes-**

**Please Review!**

**P.S. Patience is a virtue. Really, it is. –shot-**


	27. Pride

**Chapter 26: Pride**

"As expected, we are playing Seigaku in the Kantou Regional finals," announced Aihara-buchou. "Their team comprises of several freshmen, similar to ours, and I believe you are well-acquainted with them – especially you, Fuji-kun."

I nodded. "Yes, most of them are my former teammates."

"Well, Tezuka Kunimitsu is probably the one to look out for… also, their doubles Golden Pair." The captain smiled. "I watched the finals of the Nationals last year. May I just say that it was some of the best tennis I have ever seen?"

Yukimura smiled and bowed. "Thank you for the compliment, but last year, Seigaku won the National Championship."

Aihara-buchou chuckled. "It could have gone either way. In any case, with Fuji-kun playing for us and Echizen-kun still in middle school, Seigaku's strength has been reduced to a mere third of what you had to face last year. The high school Kantou and National champions will be us, Rikkaidai."

There was a ripple of assent from everyone, and I couldn't help comparing it to the loud shouts of enthusiasm Seigaku employed.

Yanagi spoke up. "Seigaku's lineup, from what we've seen of their high school team, will probably consist of Tezuka, Sadaharu and Miyagi, a third-year, in singles; the Golden Pair and second-years Ginta and Seiji in doubles. Their captain, Yamato, is unlikely to play."

"We should start planning our lineup too," remarked Aihara-buchou. "Yukimura-kun, would…"

_Seigaku…_ Silently, I prayed that I wouldn't have to face Tezuka.

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It was not to be. "_Why_?!" I demanded of Yukimura later in his room after the meeting.

"Why what?" he asked innocently.

"You know very well what I mean." My tone was ominous. "The likelihood of Tezuka being Singles Three is too high!"

Yukimura's eyes were unhelpfully blank of emotion. "Are you so against the idea of him being your opponent?"

I glared at him. "That… well, I'll lose to him, wouldn't I? I won against Niou, but that was because Niou couldn't execute the Zero-shiki Serve. The_ real_ Tezuka – "

"The real Tezuka _can_, but I believe _your_ specialty was your ever-evolving counters," he pointed out. "I'm sure you can think up something. Of course, you could always try for a psychological assault – but it's very unlikely for Tezuka to be susceptible to such a thing, especially since he's officially broken it off with you."

"Yukimura…" I sighed and buried my face in my hands. "I'm sorry, but I hope you realize the only psychological assault possible would be one from _him_ against _me_."

His eyes narrowed. "Are you saying you cannot bring yourself to attack him?"

"N-" I paused before I could finish my answer. Could I? Could I really fight against Tezuka when just the thought of setting eyes on him again made my pulse quicken?

Impossible… right?

No, it wasn't. Rules had never applied to me. I wasn't about to let them begin to do so now.

I sank onto the foot of the bed, pressing my hands over my eyes. "I will. I must."

The bed creaked and I felt it sink as cool hands covered mine. "Yes. Remember that you are Rikkaidai. Fight for us, Syuusuke."

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Sanada expertly drilled guilt into the rest of us, training almost constantly except for school and the bare minimum amount of rest. Aihara-buchou said nothing, but he did extend our already long practices and up their intensity to the point that by the end of the day I barely had the energy to walk to the dorms.

To my surprise, Yukimura did not segregate himself from us the way I almost expected him to. He ran with us, sweated with us, breathed with us; he was not above the mundane as I'd somehow always thought him to be.

Yet I couldn't understand why he practiced with such dedication. The Seigaku we were going to face was easy meat, from Yanagi's data and my own knowledge. Perhaps I'd lose to Tezuka, but there was no way Yukimura or Sanada would lose in singles to anyone less than Echizen Ryoma. With Niou and Yagyuu back together in doubles and Yanagi pairing with Sujuuta, we were unbeatable as a team.

Perhaps he still felt the pain of his defeat in last year's Nationals. I could still remember, with stark clarity, the agony in his eyes when he lost and Rikkaidai lost along with him. The memory of Sanada slapping the losers, even Yukimura, until they could no longer stand remained burned into my mind ever since.

Their pain, their blood, their proud discipline… I had certainly not forgotten; I couldn't forget, even if I wanted to.

I admired that about Rikkaidai. They reminded me of the samurai of old, who truly believed that death was better than disgrace, whose pride was more tangible than the wealth of many merchants. These people were the real fighters, people who fought with everything and more – people who were so different from me I despaired of ever understanding them fully.

It was at such times as these that I felt how wide the gap between us was.

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"Fu-ji-ko-chaaaaan!" I was nearly bowled over by a familiar redheaded ball of energy.

"Hello, Eiji," I replied, clinging to the vending machine and trying to keep my balance. Still reeling from the impact, I lost the battle and folded under him, landing hard on the pavement. "Ow… Eiji, I think you've put on weight."

"Sorry!" He quickly helped me to my feet. "Are you okay? Mou, _Fuuuujiiiiiiii_… I can't believe we have to play against you today!"

I dusted myself off. "I can't believe it either. You know, Yukimura was the one who suggested I play Singles Three, and I haven't been able to get back at him yet…"

"Ehh?! You're Singles Three?!!" Eiji exclaimed, his eyes huge. "B-but that's –"

I could feel my heart sinking to a level somewhere around our knees. "Tezuka, right?"

He shook his head violently. "No, Inui!"

My eyes flew open in shock. "_What_?"

"Tezuka's Singles Two," explained my old friend. "Inui predicted that you'd be in doubles, see –"

"Good Kami-sama, Inui's predictions are getting worse," I remarked.

" – with Yanagi," he continued, as though I'd not said anything, "and that Sanada or Yukimura would be Singles Three since it's a really important match, and that you'd most likely be in Singles Two because you always were last time –"

"Okay, okay; enough, Eiji," I cut him off. "Inui was completely wrong, as you can see – _I_'m Singles Three, Yukimura's Singles Two, Yanagi and Sujuuta are in Doubles Two."

He pouted. "I was just _telling_ you! It's not _my_ fault that Inui's a stupid idiot whose data always goes wrong somewhere!"

"Yes, Eiji, I know," I said patiently. "_I'm_ just telling _you_ that he's wrong. You can go gloat over him later…"

"Nya, that'd be funny… his eyebrows will twitch, like – so!" The redhead did a passable imitation of Inui's expression when his data was refuted, making me laugh for the first time in a long while.

"Syuusuke?" Yukimura appeared from around the corner, beautiful blue eyes full of anxiety.

I smiled and waved. "I'm here, Yukimura!"

Eiji shot me a puzzled look. "He calls you Syuusuke? Oh yeah, I remember now, I wanted to ask you whether you and Tezuka had really broken up…" His voice trailed off as he glanced back at Yukimura, who was coming in our direction. "…Did you, Fujiko?" he asked, staring at me like a kitten wanting to be petted.

"Maa, if he didn't say anything, then I suppose I shouldn't either," I said, blandly innocent. "I'd better go back to my team, then."

He caught hold of my arm. "Fujiko, you –"

"Syuusuke, is something wrong?" Yukimura had reached us, his eyebrows soaring as he took in the scene. "Um… Kikumaru-kun, is it?"

"Eiji…" I looked at my friend, nonplussed. "Just ask Tezuka, ne?"

The pretty blunette glanced at me, frowning slightly, but not saying anything. Eiji ignored him. "Tezuka doesn't like talking about you, Fujiko; he won't say anything!"

I sighed in resignation. "Fine. We broke up a few weeks back. He said he had a girlfriend."

Once again, his eyes widened in surprise. "He _does_?!"

That caught me off guard. "He _doesn't_?!"

"We're going," said Yukimura firmly, taking the arm Eiji had just released and pulling me away. "See you later, Kikumaru-kun."

"But Yukimura, I –" I tried to protest, but he cut me off.

"You are Rikkaidai. Remember that, and remember that we must win, no matter who our opponents are." His tone was hard, but I wondered for a second if it was pity that I saw lurking in his beautiful eyes.

I allowed my tensed muscles to relax a little, closing my eyes for a second before looking up at him again. "Yukimura, Tezuka is Singles Two."

His grip on my arm tightened a fraction. "Hmm… is that so? Well, it's highly improbable that we'll even reach Singles Two. Seigaku should be crushed by the time Singles Three is over."

"Yukimura, if you want to play against Tezuka, I'll throw my match." I reached out tentatively, letting my fingers brush his cheek. "It won't be difficult to make it look like I didn't want to lose."

This time he flinched noticeably, but quickly let out a laugh to cover his surprise. "Whoever gave you that idea, Syuusuke?"

"You want to play against him, don't you?" I pressed. Somehow, I instinctively knew that both of them wanted to prove themselves against each other. "Then play. Just… don't lose to him, ne?"

Yukimura stared at me for a long moment, and for a second I was afraid I'd insulted him by even suggesting that he'd lose. However, the next instant he wrapped his arms around me in a warm hug, dissipating my fears.

I put my arms around him too, breathing in his clean scent and not caring if anyone saw us. His lips tickled my ear, making me shiver, as he whispered, "I won't lose. Not to him."

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**A/N: Again, I apologize for the late update, but I did explain that I wouldn't be able to update regularly or quickly in the last chappie… :-X I feel bad for not updating, really, which is why I rushed to finish this before I leave for Australia tonight.**

**Hope you like this chappie, even if it's rather too much like a filler. If you want to know, Fuji and Kikumaru met in front of a vending machine, the kind that sell Ryo-baby's Ponta. If I remember correctly, they're near the toilets, so it's a possible place for them to walk into each other. As for Oishi… let's just say Kikumaru gave him the slip. XD**

**Please review!**


	28. Tezuka

**Chapter 27: Tezuka**

Tezuka versus Yukimura. It was going to be something worth seeing.

Worth seeing… but even so, I wished myself a hundred leagues away. Preferably in Osaka eating raspberry pies with Yuuta.

Doubles Two had passed quite uneventfully, with Yanagi and Sujuuta-sempai securing the first win in the Kantou Finals against Seigaku's second-year Ginta-Seiji pair. As Doubles One prepared, I noticed that Echizen had come as a spectator. He probably had his own match to take care of – but then again, the few people against whom he had not won easily were present here now, which might perhaps explain his interest.

Yagyuu and Niou were up against Eiji and Oishi, just like last year. Again, the unbeatable pair held their own. Rikkaidai took both doubles again, and Seigaku did not look happy. Echizen, meanwhile, watched us all as he expressionlessly sipped his Ponta.

Next was Singles Three. I wasn't particularly worried about facing Inui. His precious data wouldn't help him against me; I refute it, each and every time we've played.

He gave up on beating me in our second year, deciding instead to focus on Tezuka. The reason? I had crushed him in fifteen minutes, three times straight. It was too much for him to take. The superb control of the Tezuka Zone was easier by far for him to stomach as compared to my complete unpredictability.

But this time, I had to lose.

"Fuji. Fancy seeing you here," remarked Inui when we met at the net to shake hands.

Smiling, I replied, "I hope your data-taking has improved, or this will be a difficult game."

As I walked away from him to the baseline, I could feel him staring after me in bafflement. _Let him puzzle. It'll keep him from wondering why he's winning._

I wanted to see Tezuka and Yukimura fight it out, once and for all. Since I held the power in my own hands…

Was I so helpless that I had to make them choose for me? Why was I pushing the responsibility to others? Did I have no backbone, no mind of my own?

"Fuji-kun? Fuji Syuusuke-kun?"

I looked up to see the umpire watching me rather anxiously. "Fuji-kun, please serve."

"Ah, I'm sorry," I apologized. It seemed that I'd missed the announcement saying that it was my serve first. _Maa…_

The ball flew high, and as I bent backwards, I forced other thoughts out of my mind to focus on the ball alone. _Let's go, Seigaku._

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"Game, Rikkaidai. Six games to five." Cheers erupted from the massive crowd of Rikkaidai supporters. "Change courts."

Yukimura held out my water bottle. "You'd better decide soon," he commented. "As much as the spectators love this seemingly difficult match, we all know you're only playing with him."

I sipped the water slowly, making sure to keep my poker face. "Inui isn't complaining. Who said I haven't decided? I'll lose so that you and Tezuka can play. I promised you I would."

A smile tugged at his lips. "Promises can often be as breakable as piecrusts. We both know that."

For some reason, that made me recall the way I had once promised to stay true to Tezuka. "And what's that supposed to mean?"

"Do what you want to do, Syuusuke. I will not decide for you." His beautiful blue eyes were serene, but I thought they seemed to have a tinge of sadness as well. "You know what your choice is, in winning or losing this match."

He was right. I knew it all too well. In winning, I would deny Tezuka and Yukimura a chance to fight against each other honorably. In losing, I would surrender my pride to them both. Yet, if I lost and they did play, it was more than likely that Yukimura would win. In a sense, that meant it was a foregone conclusion

Sometimes, making informed decisions could be a right pain in the neck. It was so much easier to just rush into something and then blame the outcome on the fact that you didn't know what you were in for. Unfortunately, I couldn't do that.

In the end, it all boiled down to which was the lesser of the two evils – whether my pride or the consequences were of greater import.

If I won this game, I would keep my pride, but there would always be a lingering question mark on who I'd chosen. Yukimura knew it; I knew it. Neither of us wanted the question mark to stay longer than it already had.

Winning the game meant cutting off all emotional ties to Tezuka. Losing it sealed his defeat to Yukimura.

I passed the water bottle back to the pretty blunette, fingers lingering just a little longer than was necessary. "I think you should go warm up."

His eyebrows rose a fraction, then he smiled. "If you say so."

Not long afterwards, the umpire cried, "Game, Seigaku, six games all. Twelve-point tiebreak. Rikkaidai to serve!"

As we changed courts, Inui commented, "Your game is significantly off. This may be the first time I beat you."

"No, Inui," I corrected, "It'll be the first time I lose to you."

Then we had passed each other, and I made my way to the baseline to serve. A short time later, the stadium roared as the umpire shouted, "Game and match, Seigaku! Seven games to six!"

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Yukimura and Tezuka faced each other across the net. "We will now begin the Singles Two match of the Kantou Regional Finals between Rikkaidai's Yukimura-kun and Seigaku's Tezuka-kun," declared the umpire. "Players, please shake hands."

They obeyed, shaking hands a little stiffly. I noticed that Yukimura wasn't smiling. Of course, neither was Tezuka – not that he ever did in the middle of a match.

It was Yukimura's serve first. As he bounced the ball in preparation, I felt a hand land on my shoulder – Marui's. His violet eyes looked odd without their usual spark of mischief. "Pay attention," he said around a large green bubble. "He doesn't say it, but he wants you to see him. _Really_ see him."

"Don't I?" I asked, surprised at the hint that I didn't know the blunette as well as I should.

Marui only squeezed my shoulder by way of reply before walking off, leaving me staring after him in puzzlement. What he'd said was quite thought-provoking, and it was probably best to take him seriously.

I turned my eyes back to the game, trying to see not just his actions but to see through them as well.

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The ball swerved and slammed out of the court. "Game, Seigaku, four games all! Change court!"

Echizen was opening his third Ponta. I could see the tiny, knowing smirk on his face – he knew what this match was about.

I watched as both players drank deeply from their water bottles, wondering why Yukimura was dropping games like this. He hadn't gone all out yet, not like Tezuka, who was unleashing his Zone and Phantom with a vengeance. By contrast, Yukimura had been playing an almost bland game. It wasn't like him. Of course, he was still holding his own – but for how long?

"Don't worry about him," came Yanagi's voice from behind me. "He's fine; he won't lose."

"Why are you reassuring me of that?" I inquired of him, voice carefully neutral.

"You're doubting him, aren't you?" The data master's tone was calm and confident. "You're puzzled as to why he isn't crushing Tezuka, the way he should be able to."

I couldn't deny it, but I didn't acknowledge it either. He continued, "Don't look at the score and the moves alone, Fuji. Look at their faces, and from there hypothesize what they might be thinking."

"They're both tired," I observed after a few seconds.

"Indeed they are. Tezuka's Zone and Phantom are dangerous, and they take a heavy toll on their user as much as their opponent," said Yanagi. "Tezuka is pushing himself to the limit, despite his full understanding of the consequences. Remember _why_ he is doing this."

Once again, I did not answer. The data master went on, "Yukimura could win easily if he only pushed himself a little more. Ask yourself _why_ he spares his opponent at this point."

I bit the inside of my lip in thought. _Tezuka… he really wants to win,_ I realized. _Even though he knows it's futile. Yukimura knows this and doesn't play to his fullest abilities because he doesn't wish to hurt Tezuka further than he already has been… And I was the one who hurt him first, by crossdressing and betraying his trust._

"I believe I've made my point." Yanagi's voice pulled me from my thoughts. "Watch them clearly, Fuji, or you will never really see them."

'_Really see_'. That was exactly the same phrase Marui had used. Was I blind, that I could not, in their words, '_really_ see' Yukimura or Tezuka? Had I never '_really_ seen' them before? Or had I simply forgotten how to do so?

I didn't know.

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"Game and match, Rikkaidai! Six games to four!" The crowd's cheers were deafening. "Beating Seigaku at 3-1, Rikkaidai is the Kantou Regional Champion!"

Yukimura exited the court, his eyes weary. "Syuusuke…"

"I know. You're too kind… Seiichi." I smiled, at first tentatively, then more confidently as he returned it with one of his own. Heedless of the spectators, I wrapped my arms around him and rested my head on his shoulder. He smelled of sweat and sun, but he was still Yukimura, and that was what mattered – because Yukimura would love me no matter whether I was really a girl or a boy.

Tezuka knelt on the court, surrounded by his teammates. His fingers gripped his elbow so tightly there were spots of white on his flushed skin.

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**A/N: Whew, I finally finished a chapter! I think this will be the last thing I can upload in year 2008… it's already the 27****th**** of December, after all.**

**I hope you liked this chapter, even though it's so disjointed and everyone's a little OOC. Sorry to those who were still praying for Perfect Pair :-X but it really didn't seem to be working out. I thought it best to give it a better closure.**

**This fic still has several chapters to go, though I'm pretty sure it won't go over 40 chapters total. Maybe about five or six more chapters for them to go to Osaka, have a few adventures there and then come back for the Nationals, and lastly an epilogue.**

**Please Review!**

**P.S. Kid-chan, I'll edit the chappie you sent me (HTIYS) **_**after**_** I write mine since mine has to be uploaded first. Sorry… :-X If you want, you can start working on your Part II for now.**


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